The Old Argy Bargy Bar....a new lease of life!

Achilles, Thor and Gloopy say they are all coming as centurions ( cor!). And the Admiral wants to be Nero, with a fiddle tucked under his arm, and the Captain is coming as Caligula.The lads from the fires station will be all legionaries,
And the tattoo parlour staff want to be charioteers ( minus chariots obvs.)
The lovely lady AGA will be a vestal (giggle) virgin, I will be the wanton wicked Agrippina.
No idea what any others will be, hope we are in for a nice surprise ( as long as Doodle doesn’t come as Lurkio from Up Pompeii !)

If anyone is around, drinks are on the house tonight for the next hour, help yourselves as all the bar staff are at that new fancy club in Abattoir Street ‘ The Fast Fling’ ( I’ve heard it’s a bit of a dive actually) but there’s a speciality act on apparently,
Some old trout doing the dance of the seven veils, I expect.
Where on earth has Chewbacca got to I wonder?

No lemon I will be reclining on a lounger (lilo) being fed grapes by a handsome centurion (Thor, I’ve given up on Gloopy). ?

No staying power?

I understand....Thor has a bigger sword.?

Considerably ?

I'm here lemon. Just been swilling out the lavs ready for tomorrow night. Thought it best, what with all those grapes and wine being quaffed tomorrow. I chucked some fresh straw down on the floor; that should soak up the worst of it.

I can vouch for Doodles ability to recline for hours on a lilo. In a previous life she was actually known as Lilo Lil!

that’s me Chewy . What seductive apparel will we see you in tomorrow? ?

Funny you should ask Doodle as I was just putting the finishing touches to my outfit. I've sewn 3 king sized bed sheets together to make my toga (it's a bit on the skimpy side, so I should probably have used 4 really). I've nicked the laces out of OH's hiking boots and will lash those round my feet and legs. And I've raided next door's laurel bush to make a garland for me 'ead. I've got my eye on that terracotta jug in the next door neighbour's porch; I could carry that on my shoulder, don't you think? Don't want to look overdressed or put the rest of you to shame?

We’ll have to stand you outside the door Chewy. In that get up we’re bound to pull the punters in. ?

Looks like we’re all set up for Roman Nite then?
Will anyone be coming as a gladiator I wonder? I could ask George, he’d look good in the get up I reckon.I may even have a tussle with him meself.

The outfit sounds amazing Chewy are you coming as Voluptua? I have made my dress from nextdoor's rather grey net curtains with garlands of freesia attached to camouflage the smell of embassy no 1. The curtains are quite see-through so I'll come as Ludicrus Sexitus. I think the Emperor will be putting in an appearance as I heard Thor saying something to Gloopy about Caesar from behind, I don't think they were discussing salad.

Thanks for the lav cleaning Chewy actually I was surprised
To see you were here ( I thought that you may be the speciality act at The Fast Fling.) ?
I’ve borrowed a few old sofas for us to lounge about on this evening whilst quaffing and scoffing.

The Admiral will be aptly attired as he already has Roman hands.
Looking at the state of the floor in the gents I think Poteenus Bilius has already arrived.
Poor AGA being cast as a vestal virgin, ah well, feigns sympathy all the more for the rest of us.

I heard Thor saying something about ‘Agrippa’ earlier....am surprised he knows so much about Romans, being as he’s a Viking.

Tattoo Terence and Steamy Stan will be here later on....Stan
Is coming as Sid James and Terence as Kenneth Williams, they say they know everything there is to know about Roman life ‘cos they saw the film’.What a carry on eh?

All dressed up in my vestal virgin costume trying out an innocent look. Not easy after 2 pints of poteen. I will be Cassia Virginus but not for long judging by the look the Admiral is giving me. Or is it just his piles playing up?
I think George is coming as Gassio Maximus after Laura's description of his 'problem'.
Looks like Chewbacca will be belle of the ball tonight.
Poteen ready and I have made wine as it is Roman Nite. The llamas have been treading the grapes all day.

Hope the wine won’t be too hairy AGA as I almost choked on some of their hairs in the poteen last week.
Yes, George is swanning around the bar in his gladiator get up, he isn't missing Amal at all with all us gorgeous laydees around the place.
I’ve put the dormice on sticks, easier to nibble at that way, was I supposed to cook them first though??

Chewbacca is showing off as usual, carrying her amphora around on her shoulder and asking any male punter if he ‘wants a bit more’.Disgraceful sight really with her toga barely covering her assets.

I, on the either hand, look classy in my purple and silver costume, my dark curls in ringlets, silver bangles all up both arms, and an eagle tatoo on my arse ( in case anyone looks, later.)

These gladiators all like a young virgin. Pity. They wont find any in the Argy.
I think George is looking for Ammonia. Where is Doodle?

The wine is delishusss Lemon hic. Going down to the cellar now with Gluteus Maximus to brew more wine.

You mean Gloopy eh? Don’t be all day about it, we have customers waiting.
The Captain is looking very alluring in his Calligula persona,
What a pair of legs! Right....must go and check on the karaoke machine and .....OMG the llamas have eaten the dormice!?

I hate to be a Moaning Minnie but it has come to my notice that the Argy doesn’t seem to be observing the 10pm curfew.
Is it a case of round to lemon’s with a carry out when the bar shuts?

Are you a Covid Marshall Maw? Put on a toga and have a Roman Coke.