Gransnet forums

Chat

Good Evening Monday

(2 Posts)
Rufus2 Mon 05-Oct-20 14:19:12

A woman in her fifties is at home happily jumping unclothed, on her bed and squealing with delight.
Her husband watches her for a while and asks, 'Do you have any idea how ridiculous you look? What's the matter with you?'
The woman continues to bounce on the bed and says,
'I don't care what you think. I just came from having a mammogram, and the doctor says that not only am I healthy, but I have the breasts of an 18 year-old.'
The husband replies, 'And what did he say about your 55-year old ar*e hole?'
'Your name never came up,' she replied

G'Day! What a lovely pseudo-Summer's day! sad
Rained most of the day and cold. Had to get up early; my body has to get used to this "clocks forward" ritual. Grey, dismal sky at 8.45 and street lamp opposite still on.
Our "ring of steel" is still in operation to prevent us escaping interstate, but today there was a "ring of ice", namely our plastic toilet seat! Gee whizz! shock
I believe heated ones are available , but the idea of electricity in a water environment doesn't appeal. Could be a bit of a shock! Wooden ones remind me of old-fashioned facilities in public parks!

Sorry about that; not a pleasant breakfast topic.
Our Covid stats are still acceptable, especially when compared with yours; no deaths yesterday, but young Covidiots are still a problem especially when hot weather combines with public holidays as on Sydney's beaches.

Helen Welcome! Our extended families lived in "Darzet, mainly around B'mouth, the home of "beige cardis!" and retirees! grin

rafichagran In light of your latest Covid stats I reckon Boris looked stern enough on TV News today to introduce tighter controls on how far from home you can travel, or even a curfew. hmm
Bet you had more than one cup of coffee after that ordeal. grin It's good you're able to get to see your family.
Reminds me of "Chloe" especially the Spike Jones version!

"Through the smoke and flame, I gotta go where you
are.."
;substitute "wind and rain" Something like that!

Megs I get the impression it's wet up there, but be thankful you're not sunning yourself in the South of France or Italy. Looks terrible!
What's your NHS App.? Some sort of tracking log to help trace your movements should you develop symptoms?
That system is used here. Glad you've noticed "petering out" too; it could be due to a Covid side effect.
Anyway, keep your chin up, preferably above high tide! grin

Jane Och! you're a restless soul! Off on holiday again! You must love hotel haggis! hmm
What loch is it this time? I reckon that from all the weather reports you could hire a bull-dozer and create your own mini-loch in your back garden as shown on GN recently. Mother nature would supply the water free of charge, I imagine. Plus you'd avoid all that travel hassle!
Don't forget to take a portable CD player with you and an Arti Shaw CD of "A Room with a View" for the benefit of the hotel manager!
As for Glasgie; I've always avoided being seen there at the best of times! grin

Jaxjacky have you ordered your bandannas yet? If not, tell me which you like and I'll post two for pick-up at GNHQ. Some very distinctive designs there such that you'll want to wear them all the time!
If the "jokes" are not what you had in mind just say so; I'm working on another angle! AGAA4 seems to have disappeard; probably giving them a zero rating! sad

Chewsday already! Good Health wine wine wine
OoRoo

Jaxjacky Mon 05-Oct-20 14:55:56

Man and woman are having an argument at breakfast, he leaves for work, as his parting shot the man says ‘and you’re rubbish in bed as well’. Late morning he feels guilty, so gives her a call, ‘what took you so long to answer’ he said, she replied ‘ I was still in bed’. ‘Why are you in bed this late?’ ‘Getting a second opinion’.
Bandanas delivered, very efficient, husband hijacked a couple, bemoaning no green (he’s Irish).
Well, it was sunny here, guess what..💦 again, s’pose it is Autumn. Children and 2 GC round for garden visit next Sunday, Indian takeaway should warm us as it’s forecast to be sunny and cold all weekend.

Take care 🥂