Granny23, love to you. This will be a difficult Christmas for you without your husband there. The first ones are always the hardest. I think people would understand if you didn't send cards this year. It's not easy to send cards and leave a name off when signing it. I'd understand if anyone didn't want to deal with that, especially the first year or so. it sounds like a good plan to wait and see who gets in touch with you via card. The cards you receive will tell you a lot about the sender too.
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Do you still send Christmas Cards?
(142 Posts)I remember my late mother in law writing what seemed like hundreds of Christmas cards to everyone she had ever known . She also loved receiving lots back. Given the financial and environmental concerns, it seems card sending is going out of fashion, particularly among younger people. How many cards do you send? Will it be fewer ( or more) this year? I quite like cards to decorate the house, but wonder if anyone would notice if I didn’t send any. My DH never sends any - so is there an age/ gender divide?
I am at a bit of a loss as to what to do re cards this year now that I am a widow. His relatives (cousins) have not been in touch for years apart from a Christmas Card. The last time we saw them all was at the funeral of the last of the Aunties and Uncles. I did try to contact the cousin who has taken over the matriarch role from her Mother but they are no longer at the address I have. Nor are they in the phone book. As we could only have 20 in total at the funeral anyway. i.e. immediate family and his closest friends, there was little point in making a big effort to reach them.
I suppose I should just wait and see if any cards arrive and take it from there.
I've cut down quite a lot really but still keep in touch with a few old friends/colleagues etc by Christmas card once a year, usually with news written inside.
Lucca I have a friend who I think feels exactly as you do. A few weeks ago,after more than 10 years she phoned me. I was absolutely delighted. She did not want to talk about herself but asked me lots of questions about my family and was able to see we were not the perfect family she thought we were.So pick up the phone and contact just one person. It will make their day.
Lucca, and (((hugs)))
Lucca, I don't have massive numbers of family and friends, more due to circumstance than anything. Many people send cards to all acquaintances, if they send cards at all. It might look like lots of friends but, really, it's sometimes just that they send to many loosely acquainted people. Maybe some really do have that many friends and big families, but I'd find that exhausting. :-)
It seems to me all the more important to send cards this year when relationships have become distanced out of covid necessity. There are people I haven’t seen for years but still exchange cards with. I also use e-cards, for any occasion really. lucca if you’ve addresses why not do as oceanmama suggests? We do all make mistakes, it’s part of being human, please be gentle with yourself.
I haven’t fallen out with anyone. I just feel I’m a failure on a few fronts and those other people aren’t. The problem is exacerbated at this time of year when all the talk is of massive numbers of “family” and “friends”. Ignore me. It will pass, roll on January !
Newquay thanks for your advice. I’ll check out 123greetings.
Oh Luca-do hope there’s someone you can talk to and we’re always here too.
Grannywanny I’ve sent e-cards for a few years now-especially abroad. I send them to “peripheral” folk who I usually contact by email so I know it will be read. You can type up a small (or larger!) newsy bit to copy and paste in. Search free e-cards-I always use 123greetings. It has a lovely nativity scene. I’ve started already (done about 15) post dated 1st December.
The cards I actually send are local hospice ones.
Lucca
Actually I’ve grown apart from so many people over the years due to how I feel about myself and the relative mess I’ve made of things so that’s maybe why I don’t send cards........this is the worst time of year for me.
A good friend will understand if you've been through a hard time and drifted away. We all make mistakes and messes sometimes. Maybe a card is a good way to reach out to those you want to reconnect with, if any?
I love sending and receiving cards. It is one of the nicest parts of Christmas for me and enables me to catch up with friends I have made over the years.I send about 30 and DH sends about 40. They are all from both of us of course but he sends to his side of the family and to colleagues he had when working.
Lucca we all have mistakes in our lives, please don't be too hard on yourself.
I know I have made some big ones and i often wonder if people who don't, can ever really understand the pain that goes with some of them.
Also how do they always know the right thing to do so as not make a mistake that affects them for the rest of their lives.
For financial reasons I’m considering sending cards to just close family this year. I’m going to send the rest of my Christmas greetings by email or text.
Can I ask anyone who has done this how did you go about it the first year? I was thinking send the Christmas greetings texts/emails a little earlier than I would normally send cards to give the recipients the opportunity to send an e-greeting instead?
I don’t tell everyone that.
Yes - especially this year when I haven't seen even close friends since February
I don't want to sound critical but I've long felt, it you want to donate to charity please do so but there's no need to tell everyone you won't be sending cards because the money is going to charity. No offence intended. At Christmas I always donate (more) to our local charity and to the Salvation Army.
I do still send cards although less than I did years ago, it’s reduced over the years by about a third. I like sending them although the postage gets more and more expensive. I walk to post local ones through doors. I make regularly donations to charity through the year so don’t feel guilty about that .
Oh Lucca that’s a sad post.
Yes I still do. It’s a way to keep in touch with people I haven’t seen for years and this year it’s even more important than ever.
Every October I wonder if it’s worth the effort of sitting down writing the seemingly ever growing list but I do get a lot of pleasure out of receiving them so hopefully friends enjoy getting mine!
I can see how it looks a bit pointless sending them to people we see regularly, but the majority of mine (especially this year of course!) are to people I rarely see.
Christmas cards v donations to charities? It’s possible to do both isn’t it?
I don't but if I know someone is going to send me a card, I be sure to send them one. Since they are into them, I hope it brings them some joy to get a card back.
Yes. I like sending them, love receiving and displaying them, and am happy to support both the charities we buy them from and the greeting cards industry, struggling like so many others at this time.
Actually, upon reflection, I will do both this year - cards and a donation to charity. It’s not an either/or choice and I’m so grateful for what I have in life.
Actually I’ve grown apart from so many people over the years due to how I feel about myself and the relative mess I’ve made of things so that’s maybe why I don’t send cards........this is the worst time of year for me.
I don’t really enjoy sending them, but I love getting them so I have to send them. I always buy charity cards, but I find the designs are usually terrible, which is annoying. Sometimes more obscure charities have better designs.
Yes I send Christmas cards even to people who don't send them (but give a charity donation instead). I love to send cards as for me it's a way of connecting with people and shows that I am thinking of them, especially this year when I've not been able to see anybody.
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