Made-up Sayings

Anyone interjecting with a remark not particularly relevant to the current situation or conversation would receive, "and what's that got to do with the price of fish?" Anyone asking too many questions would be told, "you want to know the ins and outs of a duck's backside!" Any, sotto voce, behavioural corrections from my mother, especially in the company of her rather grand relations, used to elicit from my father a loud, "Why? Is it not etty kwetty?" (Etiquette)

If you asked what was for tea mum and gran would say ‘a run round table and kick at cellar door’ ???? Also if it turned dark and stormy someone would say ‘it’s looking dark ore Bill’s mother’s’ but no-one knew who Bill was

when we were young and had an accident like the day I bumped my head on the bottom of the table after picking up my spoon which I had dropped she would say thats another bump of knowledge.I asked her what she meant and she said well you've just learned not to do that again.

Jillybird, I'm N.Irish and only this morning a friend called up for something out of my garage and when he walked in he said it's all tidy and Protestent looking lol. Probably doesn't sound ok to some, but we all have our own wee sayings...

Phloembundle
I love 'having a little boy's look'.
You could apply that to lots of things done in a half a***ed, unsatisfactory way!

Cfaz49

“It’s black over Bill’s mother’s. “
When bad weather was coming in. Never did figure out who Bill was or where is mother lived as a child.

This was mentioned on another thread.
It appears that's it's used throughout the Midlands and North at least.
I've heard that it's a reference to Shakespeare, but I'm not convinced.

Scentia

A little rude but my Nan used to say “ooh, she wants to know the in’s and out’s of a fat mans arse” ironic really as she was the nosiest person I knew?

Bleurgh! That's gross!

Gingster

My DM used to say ‘ they’re throwing their money around, like a man with no arms’ ?

That's a cracker!
But what did it mean?
Did it mean that they were throwing their money about (which wouldn't make sense, but would be funny)
Or that they were mean (which would make sense, but isn't as funny).

My Mum would always say when asked what was for dinner, 'two jumps at the cupboard door and a bite at the latch!' and to express surprise at something, 'Well I'll go to the bottom of our stairs' There were loads of others too but can only think of those two right now!

*His

Never heard any of those at all Bazza.

“It’s black over Bill’s mother’s. “
When bad weather was coming in. Never did figure out who Bill was or where is mother lived as a child.

Georgesgran- we always had one similar my mam used to say-"Dont go empty handed" meaning as same as you said- but not just for going upstairs- but e.g. going in kitchen but leaving your dishes etc. Or in the house but leaving shopping behind.Leaving whatever it is when you could just as easy take it along with you i guess! I now say it (regularly!) to my 2 sons.

In our family a TV control is a zoomie, any kind of insect is a grisby, and piece of hair sticking up is a jimpy, and to request more wine we ask for a filsh. Not sure where they all come from.

If someone in the house is going on and on about something boring, the other one will say, "Oh dear, I can't find my other sock". Hint taken. Also, if one of us can't find something that someone else quickly puts their hand on, they're accused of "Having a little boy's look", in reference to my son who could never be bothered to look for anything properly.

My mother's words of comfort when something did not go quite right "Its better than a smack in the face with a wet lettuce".

Her verdict on anyone trying to show how much grander they were than other people "Her mother used to chew bread for our ducks" although I suspect this was an old Somerset saying, as is "Fine words butter no parsnips".

Are you sure it’s a rat - could be a weasel.

Pamdixon, My dad used to say something or other was "better than a slap on the belly with a wet fish."
My mum used to say "don't pull a face. If the wind changes you'll stay like that."
My young brother used to burp a lot, and we used to say "Burpee's double mixed with trouble." Burpee was a seed manufacturer and the double mixed referred to hollyhocks and other flowers that he had managed to develop.,

When my family drove me mad by returning from school/work and asking 'What's for tea' as they walked through the door, I started to always reply, 'Elephant's trunk and chips'. It stopped the questioning - and has passed into family lore. I heard my DD say it to her children recently, so it looks as though it'll run and run...☺️

My mum used to say, if something wasn't quite right " A blind man on a flying horse wouldn't stop to notice". And if she thought a couple were strange " well, they're not spoiling two beds".

I never understood 'you can't have your cake and eat it,' until I heard the American version, 'you can't eat your cake and have it.' As a child I thought it was a bit much to give someone cake but forbid them to eat it! Just now, I told myself, on discovering my empty tea mug, 'Oh well, you can't drink your tea and still have it!' Very disappointing!?

Aged about 8 and watching my mother doing the ironing I asked some question. Answer was "I don't know! You want to know the in's and out's of the cats behind!" I was affronted, I hadn't mentioned the cat. Not wise at that age I asked "what about it's behind?" She was not amused.

our favourite family saying was something is 'better than a kick up the back side with a wet fish'. No idea where it came from!!

‘I’m going to see a man about a dog! ‘
If too tired to get up and do something when I was little my Mum would say ‘I can’t - I’ve got a bone in my leg’!

My Husband always slams the door when he goes out,I usually shout "take the door with you" but of course he doesnt here that,