Is this normal?

Hmm, think I would probably got in my car and gone home !

Regardless of the underlying reasons behind this behaviour it is really unacceptable. I don't understand why people think that as parents we should take any abuse dished out by our adult children.
I agree with glammanana no way would I be waiting outside in the car. When your daughter has apologised greeneyes then is the time to have a talk with her and see why she felt as she did.

Cornishpatsy You say "Trolling is not permitted on this site."^ but neither is saying matter-of-factly that you don't think a post is genuine. Just how can anyone say something which is neither condemned as trolling nor encourages someone they suspect to be a troller? If they are genuinely suspicious that a post is not genuine, they have to report it to moderators who usually err on the side of the suspect, or else they've to keep schtumm and leave others to be taken in.
Incidentally, don't take this to mean that I necessarily want to label this thread as suspect. I haven't read enough by greeneyes57 to have an opinion. She does seem to have difficult relations. Perhaps she needs to change her approach to them.

Mind you, my mother had a dreadful habit of arriving early when I was often rushing round like a headless chicken trying to get the place half decent.
It annoyed me then but now that I am a Gran and my daughters all live at least 2 hours away, I fully understand it.
What a pity everything kicked off - is she menopausal?
Has she been OK since?

Is this the same daughter you posted about in 2018 as always being abusive to you?

Did she give you any idea of why it was so bad, you turning up a bit early?

Her reaction was probably not about you being early as that makes little sense.

She was either in a bad mood at the time and took it out on you or is stressed about something else.

I would text just asking if she is ok and you dont want to fall out.

There have been a few posts lately where they are not believed, I assume that is what Hmm means. Just because you have not experienced it does not mean it is not true. Trolling is not permitted on this site.

I’m just wondering if she didn’t want you do see the house until she’d run round for that 15 minutes doing last minute tidying up - if she’s under stress it might be that she isn’t coping with the housework, and was embarrassed. She shouldn’t have flown off the handle, but to me that sounds more likely than her needing medical help as it’s two weeks till Christmas and she’s probably struggling to get everything done.

I'm on a babysitting stint this evening for DS and DIL. I'll arrive somewhere around the time I've been asked for, but if that turns out to be too early/too late and I'm instructed to go and sit outside; they won't have a babysitter for this evening and so won't be going anywhere.

I can well understand your DD being stressed at this time what I can't understand is the total lack of respect she has shown to you just for arriving early,if it where my daughter she would not be having my help babysitting until an apology had been received and there would be no way I would sit in my car I would have taken myself home.

X post - my was wondering about another possible reaction.

Just wondering how she'd have reacted if you were 15 minutes late?

Would someone like to explain the cryptic Hmms? If you don’t think the post is genuine than say so!

And ANOTHER.

If it is totally out of character than there is something wrong.

I assume it is out of character or presumably you would not have asked the question.

If one of your children is clearly in distress, than as a parent it is your duty to help. Bugger your own feelings, rise above it and do your job as a parent.

Another hmm here!

Would she speak like that to her MIL, stress or no stress? I very much doubt it. I wouldn’t get in touch with her, let her call and apologise. Just because your are her mother you are not her punchbag.

DD is very stressed at the moment, we tend to rant at each other occasionally, me yesterday.
We love and understand each other and it really helps to get things of our chests.
One of the things that DD hates is when I go upstairs without warning, and I get short shrift and do not stay. I understand and try to get over it.
Please forgive your DD you do not know what was going on at the time and I am sure she did not mean to upset you, be strong and put it behind you.

Greeneyes My daughter would have been very pleased that I was there. I once arrived at my daughters and almost had new born put in my arms as I went through the door she was having a difficult time. I most certainly would not have sat in a car outside. May be as others have suggested she needs m3edical help.

I am sure that you are aware that this is far from normal. I am sure you must be worried for her and for her son.

Urmstongran

Hmm.

Indeed

Hmm.

No, that's not right. She asked you to do her a favour and look after her son then blew up because you were a little early? I'd doubt this has anything to do with you being early and everything to do with something else completely unrelated. I'd be concerned to make sure she is okay when things have settled down a bit. She sounds stressed.

That is completely out of line, however I imagine she was frazzled and in a state as other posters have mentioned. I can’t imagine parenting during the pandemic so I think she should be given a little leeway on outbursts. Your DD probably has so much on her plate and it’s safe to vent and take it out on mum, I’d try not take it personally.

I am so sorry that this happened but I think COVID and lockdown are responsible for many being taken to the edge and sadly sometimes beyond .
A couple on my road were found dead just weeks ago, murder/ suicide, and the preliminary inquest is investigating the effects of COVID on the terrible effects before the full inquest in MarchMental health is being affected bu many, many people.
Ring your D and chat about it and if you are not happy suggest she needs to talk to someone about how she is coping.