condolences to neighbours

BusterTank

Put a card through the door .

Markoni has already put a card through the door.

A card with a little note inside with your phone number, offering help if they need it.

One other thing I have started to do lately, when there has been a bereavement or other disaster in a person's life is as part of the next time I chat to them I just ask "are you coping ok?" Just in case it's the person's first opportunity to tell someone they're not! If nothing else some encouragement to seek help can then be offered.

Put a card through the door .

When my husband died fifteen years ago, our g.p at the time very kindly posted a sympathy card saying how much he admired my husband.
I was very touched that he took the time to do that.
I still have the card today.

Doubt very much If we would get the same response now.

I think the card was a nice thing to do, and, as others have said, nice to offer condolences in person when you meet.
I think women are usually less in need of practical help, but maybe handing in a cake or something later on would be appreciated.

It's nice that you have sent a condolence card, and do make sure to mention the loss to other neighbours too, they may have been close and due to Covid could be a little out of touch.

However, do be mindful on offering practical help; my OH and I have been well and truly taken for granted in a similar situation!

One of my near neighbours lost his wife this time last year. I sent a condolence card and offered my verbal condolences when I next saw him. That's all that's required I think.

Send a card. Some people cross the street when they see the bereaved as they don't know what to say this is the worse thing anyone can do, if this happens just offer you condolences and help if you want to.

One of my neighbours died not long ago. I popped a condolence card through the letterbox, and have chatted to his widow when we have met.
I wasn’t sure what to do about a Christmas card, not wanting to miss her out, but knowing that a “have a happy Christmas” would not be appropriate. I found a very nice card saying “with sympathy at Christmas time” and a nice message inside saying that we were thinking of them at this difficult time. People often don’t know how to interact with the bereaved, as I know from experience. I sometimes make a point of mentioning my late husband in conversation, so that people know that it’s ok to talk about him.

Can you cook a meal for her? Or do shopping? Or call her on the phone or FB Messenger?

Thanks all, popped the card through the door this morning...Didn't see them since then but will act normal if we meet any time soon and offer additional few words of sympathy. ReadyMeals it just happened yesterday....

Depends how long ago. If in recent days, then a card would be in order, it saves the awkwardness of having to offer condolences face to face later on when you bump into him in the street anyway (sorry to sound a bit practical about this). If it's weeks ago, I think personally I'd not say anything at all, and when you see him in the street just say hi and not refer to it unless he does. But do NOT cross the road to avoid him like some people do

Send them a sympathy card. I moved to a new area and the elderly man next doors wife passed away in a nursing home and the guy opposite told him he is mum had passed away through the first lockdown and he couldn't say goodbye, he was in tears. I popped cards through their doors and they were so touched.

Pop a card thru the door and say you would like to be there of she needs anything

A card through door don't knock I say this because when my dad passed some people kept knocking on mums door she didn't want to see anyone outside family. Ended up her becoming very reclusive

Like others have said, just a card through the door expressing condolences will be sufficient.

Definitely send a card. My DF died when he was only 57 and I kept all the sympathy letters and cards for years. What hurt most was when people who knew him never mentioned it as if he had never existed. I know people get embarrassed at what to say but just a kind word goes a long way.

Yes, pop a card through the door. Also I think Grannyjacq1’s advice is very important.

My mum died in October 2019, aged 95. My dad (96) lives alone and independently. He has just had a Christmas card from a neighbour addressed to both of them - over a year after mum's death. So one useful thing you could do is to let other neighbours know, so they can be supportive and perhaps avoid a situation like this. It's often difficult to disseminate news about a death these days - especially for older people who are less likely to post on Facebook etc. Also cards, letters etc are very very much appreciated and any offers of help.

It's nice to get a card - and a great comfort if people just continue to behave the same way as they always have.

It's really quite alarming if people either avoid you, or become overly sympathetic and friendly.

Yes, a simple card with a nice message. Offers of any help should be carefully considered as things can easily go beyond what you can give.
A friendly wave when you see her and maybe a word of condolence.
So sad, especially at this time of year and the added limits imposed by the virus.

A card would be a nice gesture. My neighbour brought over some flowers, which was lovely too.

Just don't avoid them afterwards when you see them. It makes things weird when neighbours obviously avoid you because of their discomfort. Give them a wave.

A kind sympathy card put through the letter box would be sufficient in this case

Thank you all once again!