The Argy Bargy Bar is back!

Ooh lemongrove I've got serious boot envy...I love a bit of bovver.
Nice to meet you Rich Roger...I can see what attracted lemongrove ?.
Which reminds me I was knitting some socks for Thor...only got one finished but it's a big one. Anyone seen him?

Oh hello Lemongrove, you do look smart! Just like ixion. Bin bags must be the rage the world over.
Did you notice, when you were sailing the seven seas last Friday, a UFO followed by a meteor shower? It was Doodle! Shot out of a cannon with her roast potatoes!

Lots of orders for hot pants grandmajet. Black leather and studs seem to be a favourite.
Now I know why my bloomers keep falling down, ixion’s pinched all my safety pins. ?
I see we have a new punter Flora. Welcome. Are you any good in a pair of marigolds (we need more bar staff)
Whoooeee, look who’s here. lemon I knew you couldn’t stay a way for long. See you’re still shopping at Madame PomPoms
Lovely outfit.......why does it say refuse on the back?
The Admiral has been upset since you left. He can’t believe you went without him.
20 more orders for hot pants girls plus a few hunky phone numbers which I’ll just keep safe for later.

Ahoy, lemongrove, fancy you two dropping anchor in our humble abode.
Lovely to see you and your gorgeous toy boy. Umm. How old??.
Or is it a case for him of any port in a storm?

Ah! It doesn’t say refuse Doodle it says refuse ( as in just won’t do it!)?
Am leading a very refined life now, which is why I have to be head to toe ‘hore kuture’ and wear the latest Paree fashions doncha know.
I do remember some sort of meteor shower now that you mention it but any roast potatoes would have been swooped on by seagulls.
I spent a parting night with the Admiral aboard the HMS Barnacle .....gave him something to remember me by ( my silver bloomers.)

You jest ixion ( surely?!) Reggie is my any port in a storm.
Am getting on a bit and a girl has to do what a girl has to do.
He’s well under my thumb btw and just meekly signs the cheques.
Send my bar bill to him, Rich Reggie, on the Sloop John B, c/o harbourmaster,
Nassau town .....our next destination. We shall be drinking all night and getting into a fight.

Blimey. Landed on your feet there lemon.
Good for you.
Does he wear a medallion, perchance ?

Good luck lemongrove. Whatever splices your mainbrace, that’s my motto!

Don't be fooled Flora, marigolds = toilet duties ?. Have you visited the little girls room yet???
Big boys room best avoided...I saw Rich Reggie headed that way...I may need to check he is ok ???

Cheek Happyme. I take great pride in my shiny urinals!

lemon I’ve made a special life belt for you in case you fall overboard after drinking too much. It’s a pair of ixion’s big bloomers with some balloons tied to the corners. It should make you float ........mind you, you might be upside down with your feet in the air..........but no change there then. ?

Happyme don’t let lemon catch you in the toilet with Rich Reggie. She might make you walk the plank ?

No offence meant grandmajet , they were immaculate but those punters were a right rough lot.....they've nicked all the loo rolls....and those M&S pot pourri thingies.

Don't worry Doodle , I have got the Admiral on distraction duties and you know how distracting he can be

I’m off home with the order book. Looks like we’ll be busy making hot pants next week. Just make sure lemon doesn’t help herself to the takings (she’s already pinched the loo rolls)
Last one in locks up. First one in cleans up. ?

Just wondering, has anyone seen LauraNorder since she took ixion’s disappearing potion? Is she still here unknown to us? That could explain the missing snacks/poteen slops. I hope she’s ok.

After a night locked in the lavs with Rich Reggie I can report as follows.

Firstly he is NOT rich.....he flatly refused to stump up my one and six despite it being clearly displayed on my price tag.

AND..... he is not even called Reggie .....he is Roger from up the boating lake. Yes ..that Roger...Roger with the megaphone shouting "come in no. 9 your time is up" followed by "are you in difficulties no.6" when he remembers he only has 7 boats!
His wife reported him missing a couple of weeks ago after he had a knock on the head with an oar.

She on her way round to collect him now so I've locked him in the cellar.

The safe is empty and so is the till. Has lemon been in? When she went off with Rich Reggie she left a note saying "there is no money left". She is the owner so we can't complain. Need to get those hot pants orders paid for.

My politician dress has had some interest. Not as a dress but to use as a dartboard.

grandmajet I think Laura is working at the Slug and Salt down by the docks.

Happyme what a disappointment for lemon when she has to pay for the cruise he took her on.
She should know by now never to trust a sailor even one on a boating lake. What a cad!

Well I’m not surprised about Rich Reggie. I think lemon might have sailed away with our takings.
Right, sewing machine set up in the cellar. We’ll take turns knocking out our designer cheap hot pants. AGA your excused sewing duties as you’re in charge of poteen.
Grandmajet just lay on the floor so I can draw round you to make a pattern for the hot pants. ?

The Admiral has just been in asking if his hot pants are ready.
I have persuaded him to pay for 3 pairs. I just hope he wears them at home

After last night lying down is no problem Doodle. It’s standing up that’s a bit tricky. ?

Which part of your dress is the main target Aga? Putin, Trump or Cameron?
No orders for the Christmas wrapping paper outfit? Well, I am surprised - although maybe not after it exposed Happyme in her smalls!
I’ll take a turn on the sewing machine after my nap. ?

I think they will all end up being skewered grandmajet

Here now for a bit while, since the sewing machine is, according to Betty Hutton, a girl's best friend.
Sad, I know.
I'll knock out a few pairs. Any tips on sizing, or just XXL to err on the side of caution?