Power of attorney

One thing I’d add - do be sure to read the instructions that come with the forms properly - and follow them exactly.

If you don’t, then IIRC your forms will be rejected and you’ll have to do it all over again - and pay another fee.

I have completed hard copy forms for POA and am waiting for the Court of Protection to register them. There are 2 of us and each of us have nominated each other and both sons. It was not complicated, but what made it confusing was all 4 of us have the same surname, I had to separate the forms to get all the witness signatures, one through the post. The forms for Financial and Health are almost the same. I got in quite a muddle and it was a headache for a long time, because of the difficulties in having to have a little physical contact with people. I could not ask a neighbour to pop in to witness signatures, and each appointee had the same issue.

So my advice would be

1. Be methodical.
2. Keep all packs of forms together, but separate
3. Do not attempt it during a lockdown!

Incidentally, I had some parts of the forms returned because of an omission/error. I was not billed for this.

Nonogran solicitors have been getting witness signatures outside, main person in the car, witness signing paperwork on the bonnet, being used for house purchases widely as well.

We have done this including and included an end of life plan too.
We watched helpless as OH mother was placed in a care home and given treatment others deemed necessary extending her life to a pitiful exsitence making her a mockery of herself. She had dementia and couldnt make the decsions for herself.
The reason we chose to do it through a lawyer was so that it would be legal and regestered. Even if I lose my copy its on record and can be called up aat the touch of a button.

My doctor has been emailed a copy so they know whats gong on and my children are all well aware of whats in it because we discussed it all before going ahead to ensure they were all in agreement.

We managed witnesses for our updated wills during lockdown one. A trestle table set up outside the garage, us on one side, neighbours on the other, used our own pens, hand washing right afterwards, QED.

The forms are very straightforward and simple. There is no need to use a solicitor. Just get it done now, rather than later.

Cass64, did you have no say? Once my poor mother was past a certain stage of dementia (she had it for nearly 15 years) we made it very clear to the care home where she lived from 89 to 97, that unless there was no other option (e.g. in the case of another broken hip - she’d survived one at over 90) - there was to be no hospital (in any case a terrible place for anyone with dementia) and no life saving or life-prolonging treatment.

We had absolutely no problem in getting the care home staff to agree that it would not be in her best interests.

It cost my dad over £1,200 (plus vat)with solicitor to sort health side and finances. I know I could have done it myself but dad/brother wanted solicitors. Then charged another £250 plus vat to change will...huh! Dick turpin comes to mind.

Witzend

*Cass64*, did you have no say? Once my poor mother was past a certain stage of dementia (she had it for nearly 15 years) we made it very clear to the care home where she lived from 89 to 97, that unless there was no other option (e.g. in the case of another broken hip - she’d survived one at over 90) - there was to be no hospital (in any case a terrible place for anyone with dementia) and no life saving or life-prolonging treatment.

We had absolutely no problem in getting the care home staff to agree that it would not be in her best interests.

As my sister in law lived nearby she arranged everything and would pop into the care home almost daily.
But as fast as we put up photos and tried to arrange physio it they were taken down treatment cancelled because 'it wasnt worth it' her hands curled into a ball and her nails dug into her palms, no one cut her nails until my daughter visited .
At the end she screamed every time anyone touched her so she was often left unwashed.

But for every cough or sneeze antibiotices were shoved down her throat and she was treated for several small things which might if left have allowed her to slip away with a little dignity but instead she was kept hanging on , suffering a life that wasnt living. Most of the time family was not even consulted because these things were considered routine.

It was awful. I also know a couple of people from dementia contacts whos loved ones have had similar issues, one man was moved to a home 150 miles from his wife and because she has no POA she had no say in his treatment or the power to stop it.

How awful, Cass64. I do often wonder why it’s considered necessary to keep people going when their quality of life is so poor, with every shred of dignity stripped away. Though I know some relatives do want absolutely everything done no matter what, and get very upset if anyone suggests that it might be kinder to let Nature take its course.

We didn’t have a Health and Welfare P of A for my mother, only the finances one - I think she’d originally set it up before the H&W one was available, i.e long ago, well before she actually developed dementia.

She hadn’t lived near us, but the care home we eventually moved her to was just a few minutes’ drive from our house, so I was able to visit regularly.

There was a childless elderly aunt in her late 80s, too, also in a care home with dementia, and at one point when it was fairly advanced and she was suffering the umpteenth UTI and refusing food and drink, I was asked whether we wanted her taken to hospital and put on drips etc., or left where she was, where they’d keep her comfortable, but where she was going to die.

Every other family member I could ask was away or otherwise out of contact, so it was a terrible decision. I could only ask the lovely GP what he’d do if it was his much-loved aunt.
He said that since it was only going to happen again, probably quite soon, he’d leave her where she was, in familiar surroundings, where they’d keep her comfortable.

I sat with her a lot during her last days - she was asleep nearly all the time. The care home staff were lovely, they continued to offer food and drink but she’d just close her mouth and turn her head away. She drifted away quite peacefully after about a week.
It was an awful decision at the time but I never once regretted it afterwards - I’m quite sure it’s what she’d have wanted.

The government website is easy, just go through it systematically. Same with Probate, straightforward although I haven't done one with IHT so can't comment on that.

We witnessed one for a neighbour who had gone through a solicitor and it was exactly the same form. You would have to find all the information for a solicitor so might as well do it yourself.

There is no charge to do it but you have to pay to lodge it, It think it is about £80 - £90 for each.

Thanks all..?

If someone does not have capacity to make a PoA, it can be done through the Court of Protection, a bit cumbersome and more expensive than if done while still sentient, but it is possible, because a friend had to do it this way for her mother.

We did our POA's about 18 months ago. We went through a solicitor, as a friend had problems with one they had done themselves, ( didn't find out until it should have come into action & they needed it), therefore costing more time & money. & they are clever, savvy folk.

Well worth doing though, however you decide to do it.
Make sure you do both parts(health & finance).

Good Luck.

According to Martin Moneysaver everyone, whatever age, should have a POA, on the grounds that you never know what’s around the corner. Makes sense when you think about it.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Well the forms have arrived this morning, very quickly. I must say they look a bit daunting and I think it would be easier to do online but I don’t have a printer and don’t know if you can get a printer that works with an iPad mini. Does anyone know of such a thing?

If you did have a wireless printer Shinamae you'd be able to send printing to it. Worth getting one if you are helping your son with his purchase.

Thanks shandy,yes I am definitely going to get one...?

Shinamae If you have a friend with a printer, why not ask them to download the forms and print them off? Must easier and probably quicker than waiting for the forms to arrive.

Thanks Dinahmo.....The forms have actually arrived but I find them a bit daunting and have done a lot of it online now where there doesn’t seem to be so much questioning so I am going to get a printer because I’m sure it will come in handy for other things as well...?

Printer ordered and on the way. ?

I’ve done POAs several times now. Twice for relatives and twice for friends. It’s really all very simple and easy to understand. It only costs a set fee for each one to be registered - 1 for health and 1 for finance. Probably no more than £200 in total. Some of my other friends have paid solicitors hundreds of pounds! There really is no need. Just read it carefully.

I can use my wireless printer on my iPhone, iPad mini and my laptop from any room in my house! Technology is amazing - when it works!

My husband has just finished sorting out the POA forms for his parents who needed very clear guidance to fill in ‘their’ bits of the form, but otherwise it’s a very straightforward process and each POA comes in under £90 if you do it yourself.