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Is this grounds for divorce?

(78 Posts)
kittylester Thu 25-Feb-21 14:11:29

This morning I was using my laptop in a cold corner of the dining room so boosted the heating. DH, who is sitting (in the sunshine, in my car) outside a hospital waiting for the cancer patient he is giving a lift to, was bored so checked the hive settings and turned it down!!!

LMW1 Sat 27-Feb-21 07:23:04

My Husband has done worse and lived to tell the tale. I don't think Divorce would be an option in this case.

GrannyRose15 Sat 27-Feb-21 00:07:03

I couldn't live with a man who insisted on a cold house. Fortunately DH would never dare turn the heating down. grin

Saetana Fri 26-Feb-21 23:28:05

I'm peri menopause - although I've always been warmer than my husband, due to being a hardy northerner rather than a soft southerner (as I call my beloved). We get around the issue by me sitting around in a thin t-shirt in the middle of winter and him wearing a t-shirt, sweatshirt, and a thick cardigan on top. Marital harmony is maintained by this and a moderate level of heating grin

Kryptonite Fri 26-Feb-21 22:13:36

I'm the one who turns the heating down in our house!

kittylester Fri 26-Feb-21 21:37:42

Thank you all for engaging on this thread.

For the avoidance of doubt - as Laura said, this thread was started as light hearted banter. I am not an ill treated or oppressed wife. grin

Florida12 Fri 26-Feb-21 21:01:45

Lol, I now believe the male species comes pre programmed to be obsessive about thermostat control with the heating, and commandeering the tv remote controls.

Harmonypuss Fri 26-Feb-21 18:35:27

One of the reasons I divorced mine was for persistently buying me chocolates that I hate and he knew full well that I'd rather have had nothing!

The day I served the papers I threw 4 years' worth of birthday, mother's day, easter and xmas chocolates at him!

Tea3 Fri 26-Feb-21 15:46:26

Thank you kittylester. You have given me one blessing to count. Mr T irritates me in many ways but that’s not one of them. A cold dinner and a bag of ice cubes put in his side of the bed tonight could sort the problem.

TLVgran48 Fri 26-Feb-21 15:30:46

My DH tends to turn down the heating saying "It's hot", to which I retort (like a broken record) "No, it's not hot, you're hot" ... all a question of semantics.

EmilyHarburn Fri 26-Feb-21 14:58:32

I need good heating. Once we have the winter all day programme off and go over to morning and evening I use my personal small fan fire with thermostat which I set in rooms where I am sitting alone and the temperature is below my comfort. It then only comes on if the temperature falls below my comfort level. I have to be careful to turn it off if I leave the room as I do not want to make the mistake of it running in my office all night. I do however as a first measure put on a One Size Beach Bath Microfiber Surf Poncho Robe Hooded, a Wetsuit Changing Towel. I paid for one that was long and in a pattern. It is much admired and goes over anything.

Nicegranny Fri 26-Feb-21 14:14:30

He would find that Hive gadget
@£;/-)&@?!’$#|^’ shine !

dolphindaisy Fri 26-Feb-21 14:03:11

DH and I never argue about the heating, instead he simply turns it down when he passes the control in the hallway, and I simply turn it up when I pass the control in the hallway. Neither of us says a word!

muse Fri 26-Feb-21 13:46:22

NellG

Yes. I suggest spilling your coffee, accidentally, all over the Hive unit as a swifter solution than divorce. It at least might buy you some time!

cafecafe grin

Flakesdayout Fri 26-Feb-21 13:42:00

My heating thermostat is remote device working on wifi I think. Its far to complicated for my OH so if I'm hot I turn it down and if its cold I turn it up. If he is cold then he puts on a jumper etc. So selfish of me I know :-) HaHaHaHa

TrixieB Fri 26-Feb-21 13:37:14

I can never understand why some women allow themselves to be treated like disenfranchised children.

It’s no longer the 19th century and husbands/OHs are not entitled to decide whether you are warm enough or use the tumble dryer too much. If it’s a question of economy, then it needs a joint financial decision not a decree.
This kind of control is surely unacceptable in the 21st century?

vampirequeen Fri 26-Feb-21 13:27:13

My solicitor told me that not putting your socks in the wash bin can be deemed to be unreasonable behaviour and therefore reason for divorce. Your DH committed a capital crime but you can't have him executed so you'll have to go down the divorce route.

grandtanteJE65 Fri 26-Feb-21 13:26:41

This is a really good reason not to have a smart phone and apps that can turn your heating , oven etc ,up or down, on or off.

Right now I am fighting the opposite battle, trying to get DH to realise that our heating bills are too high not because we have had more heat in the house, but because the radiators that he says are working fine, are according to the municipal heating plant malfunctioning and he won't do a d*** thing about it, and I can't.

Beanie654321 Fri 26-Feb-21 13:17:05

I put more clothes on, but hubby turns it up in our house. Must admit we both do things that irritate each other. I've just got into trouble for mowing front lawn as I'm shielding and he thinks it's to risky, he never mows the lawn.

Marydoll Fri 26-Feb-21 13:08:58

LauraNorder ?
No martyr here either. Of course it's just meant to be banter. ?

Quizzer Fri 26-Feb-21 13:01:11

Mine moans about the heating bills, but he's the one who ALWAYSVleaves the doors open when he goes outside!!

LauraNorder Fri 26-Feb-21 13:00:21

brazenp75, I’m pretty sure this thread is about a bit of banter and fun between happily cohabiting equal partners. No need to worry. No martyrs here.

brazenp75 Fri 26-Feb-21 12:47:36

It's easy to apparently put up with this thoughtlessness and thus turn yourself into a martyr - not a good idea as it festers and is a kind of passive aggression.

Marydoll Fri 26-Feb-21 12:37:44

Bbbface, if it was in the coldest room in the house, it would boost the heating, without him realising. He never feels the cold. Chronic ill health means I feel the cold badly. It used to be a battle, I would turn it up,he would turn it down.

leeds22 Fri 26-Feb-21 12:25:23

Definitely grounds for divorce. On the other hand, I’m the thermostat turner downer in our house .....

pamdixon Fri 26-Feb-21 12:15:23

Definitely grounds for divorce I'd say. Good luck with the patio.....................