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Is this grounds for divorce?

(77 Posts)
kittylester Thu 25-Feb-21 14:11:29

This morning I was using my laptop in a cold corner of the dining room so boosted the heating. DH, who is sitting (in the sunshine, in my car) outside a hospital waiting for the cancer patient he is giving a lift to, was bored so checked the hive settings and turned it down!!!

lovebeigecardigans1955 Thu 25-Feb-21 14:15:05

Well kitty you know what they'd say on Mumsnet, don't you? LTB (leave the bastard) - only joking!

Kim19 Thu 25-Feb-21 14:15:58

Suspect he won't be doing that twice!

Doodledog Thu 25-Feb-21 14:17:19

Yes. Divorce him, then kill him grin.

Mine will often complain about the heat in a room he's not even using, and has been known to walk past the thermostat (in the kitchen) and turn the heating down because he's warm enough.

Words are always spoken, and he behaves until he forgets, then the cycle starts again. I wouldn't dream of adjusting heating when there was someone else in the house, without checking with them first.

NellG Thu 25-Feb-21 14:24:38

Yes. I suggest spilling your coffee, accidentally, all over the Hive unit as a swifter solution than divorce. It at least might buy you some time!

Grandmabatty Thu 25-Feb-21 14:28:41

On Mumsnet they talk about building a patio. If you need a hand ...

midgey Thu 25-Feb-21 14:29:42

There is only one thing to do.......get the patio prepared!

Marydoll Thu 25-Feb-21 14:31:56

Kitty, I have just read this to my husband, your husband's doppelganger! He has blushed. 🤣

Rosie51 Thu 25-Feb-21 14:36:11

My other half wouldn't adjust the heating without checking with me, but is known to start playing a video recording when I've clearly been interested by the news or suchlike that's come on when he switched on the TV before he went to video playback. He always says "oh do you want to go back" when I mention it, but by then I'm in a huff so no smile After all these years I don't think I can train him out of it. Just read this to mine too Marydoll his reply? "See I could be worse"

Redhead56 Thu 25-Feb-21 14:41:54

I would verbally blast him they have their own rules and they are all dictated by remote controls.

paddyanne Thu 25-Feb-21 14:54:12

My OH is the one who feels the cold,I'm happy without any heating on most of the time ,he walks in the door and its turned up full .Same at bedtime I open the window he walks in shivers in a way that I can see and hear him and closes the window ,quite often he goes downstairs and turns the heating up " just until the chill is off the air".
I jokingly said to him that if he dies first I'll be quids in,I dont eat fillet steaks and smoked salmon and wash them down with nice wines and have a drawer full of chocolates and sweets and I dont have the heating set at 72 as it was on Monday .What will I do with all I save ?

Blossoming Thu 25-Feb-21 14:57:28

Grounds for divorce? It’s grounds for justifiable homicide imho.

ayse Thu 25-Feb-21 15:04:18

I’m lucky as I’m in control of utilities. I have no intention of getting hive or any other remote controller. Manual ones seem to be far more robust. In any case I have quite enough wireless in my life and don’t want more.

I think I might have given my husband an ear full!

Jomarie Thu 25-Feb-21 15:16:03

I feel your pain kittylester my OH is just the same grin

AGAA4 Thu 25-Feb-21 15:16:12

That's why I like being single. The thermostat is always where I want it to be. I don't have to fight for the duvet now either.

ExD Thu 25-Feb-21 15:21:34

Re the duvet issue - we have a single one each (on a king size bed) and its bliss (not solved the snoring issue yet).
The thermostat issue is a non starter, it will be top of my divorce reasons. I just turn the heat up again - higher.

HurdyGurdy Thu 25-Feb-21 15:43:14

Never mind grounds for divorce - no jury in the land would convict you of murder!

DanniRae Thu 25-Feb-21 16:31:33

Mr R wouldn't have a clue how to do that so not a problem.

kittylester Thu 25-Feb-21 16:53:00

We had a hive because the previous controls were in an awkward place and I was the only person who understood how to work them. I can see now that was an error!!

timetogo2016 Thu 25-Feb-21 16:59:33

Sadly Doodledog it`s illegal to kill him.
Thank god my dh feels the cold more than i do.
Then again when your sat on your arse most of the time you would feel the cold more.

tanith Thu 25-Feb-21 17:01:36

One of the few joys of living alone (they are few) is no one but me touches my heating controls. Defo grounds for divorce.

annsixty Thu 25-Feb-21 17:10:18

Who can I divorce/blame / kill then?
I had the boiler serviced yesterday, all day my GD who is working from home has been complaining of feeling chilly.
I have been in the conservatory where the sun was doing a brilliant job.
I came into the house and agreed it was a bit nippy, I turned the thermostat up to no response so checked the boiler.
The engineer had changed the setting to twice a day, no wonder we were cold.
All is well now, it is still February after all.
I suggest no wine for your H tonight Kitty, just a small punishment.

MamaCaz Thu 25-Feb-21 17:15:51

My OH doesn't seem to know how to alter our to thermostat, but we still have frequent disagreements about the temperature in the house.
Since the menopause hit me about a decade ago, I am the one who is tempted to sneakily turn it down.

In fact, I have recently started sleeping in another bedroom because I can't bear the bedroom at 21 degrees at night!

However, he has taken to lighting the open fire on cold winter days, saying that "it's going to be a cold night".
The thing is, we have modern air-sourced heating system that under normal circumstances keeps the house at a steady temperature anyway, UNTIL HE THROWS IT OUT OF KILTER BY LIGHTING THAT B****Y FIRE! (Because it works based on the temperature in a different part of the house.)

The result: the living room is far too hot for me to bear, but the rest of the house is colder than normal.

My reaction: Grrr!
His reaction: Brrr (shiver)

NanaandGrampy Thu 25-Feb-21 17:21:14

I'm surprised you didn't meet him at the door with the frozen leg of lamb and commit the perfect crime :-)

Luckygirl Thu 25-Feb-21 17:23:26

I think this is called "controlling behaviour" kittylester and it is indeed grounds for divorce.