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IRONIC HUMOUR ..........BUT so true

(93 Posts)
Maywalk Mon 17-May-21 19:52:22

I had this sent to me the other day and thought others might like to read it too.
.........................................

Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape.
He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:

Knowing when to come in out of the rain
Why the early bird gets the worm
Life isn't always fair and maybe it was my fault
Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge).
His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations
were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.
It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an Aspirin to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.

Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realise that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

Common Sense was preceded in death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife,
Discretion, by his daughter, Responsibility, and by his son, Reason.

He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers:

I Know My Rights
I Want It Now
Someone Else Is To Blame
I'm A Victim

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone.
If you still remember him pass this on.
If not, join the majority and do nothing.

Callistemon Tue 18-May-21 16:30:22

Not particularly you, FannyC, yours are probably the least spiteful.

I may not agree with the OP's views but I think there is so much spite on GN lately which is far worse.

Callistemon Tue 18-May-21 16:32:45

Not you in particular FannyC, yours are probably the least of it.

If posters don't like a thread why not ignore it or just say they don't agree and leave it at that without all the spiteful comments?

Callistemon Tue 18-May-21 16:33:28

2nd post would not post.

Ngaio1 Tue 18-May-21 16:40:31

Maywalk, So very true.

FannyCornforth Tue 18-May-21 16:42:10

Callistemon it's okay, I'll take the blame!
I explained upthread that I enjoy May's original posts.

May for heaven's sake, don't stop posting because of my comments.
It seems that you have a lot of experiences and opinions to share.
Those are the really interesting things.

Brahumbug Tue 18-May-21 17:00:40

"Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault."

That verse is utter bilge. You have always had the right to defend yourself and your property against intruders and still do.

Blossoming Tue 18-May-21 17:12:01

I misread that as ‘you couldn’t defend yourself from a bugler’.

Galaxy Tue 18-May-21 17:13:26

They can be lethal those bugles you know.

Callistemon Tue 18-May-21 17:35:19

Blossoming

I misread that as ‘you couldn’t defend yourself from a bugler’.

grin
Especially one who is off-key

JenniferEccles Wed 19-May-21 07:19:21

I recently read something which shows a complete lack of common sense.
An individual, with an online user name of Laurence complained to LNER railway because the conductor on his/her train had made an announcement welcoming ‘ladies and gentlemen’ to the train service.

Now it appears that‘Laurence’ describes themselves as non-binary, so doesn’t identify as male or female and so concluded that the train announcement didn’t apply to him/her.

Now the shocking part of all this nonsense is that the rail company issued a grovelling apology, unbelievably stating that its staff “shouldn’t have used language like that”
Language like that? Ladies and gentlemen?

Too often it’s found that grovelling apologies are issued in daft incidences like this which turns a non- event into a laughing stock.

Kim19 Wed 19-May-21 07:39:41

Maywalk, I totally respect your decision to take your leave of us. I would simply ask you to please reconsider that and perhaps decide in our favour?

JenniferEccles Wed 19-May-21 07:41:06

I second that Kim19

DiscoDancer1975 Wed 19-May-21 09:24:23

Brahumbug

"Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault."

That verse is utter bilge. You have always had the right to defend yourself and your property against intruders and still do.

It’s true....you can defend yourself, but you can’t use ‘excessive force’ ( whatever that is ). The problem is it’s open to interpretation, and if you’re frightened for your life, or those of your children / grandchildren, you’ve still got to weigh up, in the heat of the moment, how best to deal with it.

DiscoDancer1975 Wed 19-May-21 09:39:50

JenniferEccles

I recently read something which shows a complete lack of common sense.
An individual, with an online user name of Laurence complained to LNER railway because the conductor on his/her train had made an announcement welcoming ‘ladies and gentlemen’ to the train service.

Now it appears that‘Laurence’ describes themselves as non-binary, so doesn’t identify as male or female and so concluded that the train announcement didn’t apply to him/her.

Now the shocking part of all this nonsense is that the rail company issued a grovelling apology, unbelievably stating that its staff “shouldn’t have used language like that”
Language like that? Ladies and gentlemen?

Too often it’s found that grovelling apologies are issued in daft incidences like this which turns a non- event into a laughing stock.

I feel like giving up.....everyone’s going mad!?

Parsley3 Wed 19-May-21 10:05:01

Non events turned into laughing stocks? So true, but then we humans like to pick up on nonsense and call it typical of today.

JenniferEccles Wed 19-May-21 10:06:25

What’s so annoying is that it’s a tiny minority, albeit a vociferous minority, who engage in this nonsense and the rest of us, the majority of the population are expected to pander to their daftness.

If the nonsense was just ignored they would soon tire of it.

It must be a form of attention seeking mustn’t it?

DiscoDancer1975 Wed 19-May-21 10:09:30

Goodness knows Jennifer. It’s all mad to me!

JenniferEccles Wed 19-May-21 10:13:05

Of course those who don’t wish to identify as either male or female are perfectly entitled to do so, but when, as in the case I described, they kick up a fuss at the term ‘ladies and gentlemen’ they have lost us!

Ro60 Wed 19-May-21 10:57:14

Maywalk Thank you for the poem. I love the ones you compose too.

This one made me think of instances where we have gone too far & forget Common Sense - but there again if Bojo is to be believed, we need all the safety instructions & rules because we're all dumb serfs.
A friend had to go on a days course for her to be allowed to use the step ladder in the company where she works!
The mass of unnecessary signage around today.
I'm sure there are other examples .....?

Feelingmyage55 Wed 19-May-21 11:13:22

Maywalk. Would you please pm me a link to your books? Also your WW2 page.
Thank you and I certainly don’t want you to stop posting.

FannyCornforth Wed 19-May-21 11:17:32

Feelingmyage
I can't do links, but if you Google Maisie Walker, her books are available on reprint.uk

Maywalk Wed 19-May-21 15:15:59

Thanks to those who have asked me to carry on and Thankyou Fanny for letting Feelingmyage know how to get to the books. I say books but really they are more like a slimline magazines. No glossy covers.
Any profits from any of them has all gone to charity, especially for the Rainbows Childrens Hospice or animal charities.
I will PM Feeling my age with my WW2 website addie.

I could not get in before to answer folks.
I have been celebrating my 91st birthday today with my family because it is also my d-i-ls birthday.
Keep safe everyone.

Shinamae Wed 19-May-21 15:21:24

Happy happy birthday * Maywalk*...??????

Maywalk Wed 19-May-21 15:25:25

Many thanks Shinamae.
It has been a busy day with SO many lovely greetings coming from worldwide.

Squiffy Wed 19-May-21 15:31:39

Happy birthday Maywalk. I’ve read and loved one of your wartime stories. I think I may have found it via a previous post of yours on GN, some years ago!