What’s your favourite mondegreen?

My husband as a child thought that the last line of Rudolf the Red Nosed reindeer was. “you’ll go down and kiss Doreen”

I thought “ Poetry in Motion” was “Oh, a tree in motion.” Until someone pointed out my error.

WHEN I WAS 5 YEARS OLD I HAD TO LEARN THE HAIL MARY AND THE WHOLE CLASS PRAYED AND FORGIVE US OUR SCISSORS [SINNERS]NOW AND AT THE HOUR OF OUR DEATH AMEN.

When my sister was very small and the other children were playing at Dr Who she came home saying: “l am a toilet.”

From Black Velvet Band by The Dubliners- "And her hairy tongue over her shoulder, Tied up with a black velvet band."

It's really "And her hair, it hung over her shoulder" but I prefer the hairy tongue interpretation.

In "Christmas Carol " which they had seen on TV, a friend thought Bob Cratchit was Pork Scratchings and had done for years.
When the children were small we had dancadils and paterkillers in the garden.
A child I taught said she liked me better with stip lick.

When my DD was four years old, she would not accept that:
'Away in a Manger, no crisps in the bed' , was incorrect!
She did love her food though!

My daughter as a young child when shopping one day sat down and said "I am NOT going into Marks and Spensives again!"

Been known as that ever since!

My cousin who has Down’s syndrome loves to sing. He’s a big Elvis fan. He used to sing In the Gateau (ghetto). He even used to burst into a rendition of In the Gateau if he was served cake for dessert.

For Golden Brown he sang Gordon Brown and if Gordon Brown appeared on tv he would sing it.

The song by REM the sidewinder sleeps tonight, sounds like “only cheryl baker” it should be “call me when you try to wake her”

Kim19

For many years I happily sang what I thought was a fun nonsense song :- Mairsie dotes and dozey dotes and little amsey tivey. A kiddle etivie too, wouldn't you?

Actual words:- Mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy. A kid'll eat Ivy too. Wouldn't you.

I will never understand why my family never put me right on this. I was a reasonably articulate child......?? I was an adult when discovered this quite by chance. Blimey!

Well, I never! Kim19 I thought I was singing the right words, till you posted.
Never too old to learn.

At Christmastime 'A weighing a Major'.

The backing line to Elvis's Teddy Bear is surely the repetition of 'hot banana'. I think it really is...unless anyone knows otherwise.

I'm crying with laughter at some of these...

Bringing in the sheep, bringing in the sheep, we will go rejoicing bringing in the sheep. I still sing this even though I now know it should be sheaves.

EllanVannin

"And lead us not into Thames station". Lord's Prayer.

...and deliver us from Eve Hill. It's a place near where I live, well known in the area.

We're having big fun by Inner City, sounds like 'we're having meatballs'.

From Bohemian Rhapsody, my husband always sings "spare him his life for his warm sausages"

Go and get stuffed
When the going gets tough-Billy Ocean

Four hundred Children and a chop in the field
Ruby don’t take your love to town

Good King Wenless last looked out. But have to admit I was wrong with lots of songs before it was confirmed Was partially deaf in both ears!

From the Bear Necessities: My daughter when young used to sing “Forget about your worries and your stripes”.

Sex on fire by Kings of Leon

Woah Oh Oh Oh Oh your socks are on fire

Gcs sing this in the car and I just love it.

"Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curtains away."
I can still remember wondering why anyone would eat their curtains.

Bohemian Raspsody ....just gotta right out of Mia .
A hymn at school always confused me. The lyric was 'nobody knows the trouble I see'. I heard it as 'nobody knows the trampoline sea'.

I'm a Surviver by Destineys Child. It always sounds as if they are singing about a Bus Driver at one point.

My husband has absolutely loads of lyrics he’s got wrong over the years!
All sing Matilda - Waltzing Matilda
I’m a Thai girl - I’m a tiger (Lulu)
The night has a thousand knives - The night has a thousand eyes
And perhaps the best one
Apollo dives to her - apologise to her (She loves you, The Beatles)