What’s your favourite mondegreen?

Michael Jackson "....the chair is not my son..."

Peter Kay has a very funny video that’s been around for ages…on this very subject

m.youtube.com/watch?v=7my5baoCVv8

Makes me smile every time ?

Lin52, you made me smile and think of a time I was with my 4 year old grandson (now 24) We ere in a huge post office with an equally huge line of people waiting to be served. My grandsons name is Asher.

So when the automated tannoy voice came over saying ‘Cashier number 5 please’ he looked at me unable to contain his excitement saying ‘that lady knows my name’!!! He misheard cashier for Asher!

For years I thought that Chris Rea's "Stainsby girl" was a Sainsburys girl.

I thought it was "Felines on your shirt "not 3 lions
And "we'll call it a tramp" not caught in a trap!

Grannybags

You don't have to say you love me just because of ham - Dusty Springfield

My brother and I were convinced that Dusty sang, "You don't have to say I'm lovely just because I am." Egotistical or what, hee hee?!

Nine stone instead of rhine stone cowboy. (Glen Campbell). Not your usual cowboy physique!

“Stand in your dinner your mummy or your life”
Adam Ant

My partially deaf mother used to sing what she thought were the words of a hymn as 'Itchy on earth hath you none'. I think the real line was 'Yet ye on earth hath union'.

Thank you all for the laughs.

Actually, Baubles " A wean in a manger, no crib for a bed,
The little Lord Jesus laid down his sweet head" does make better sense.

I can't be the only one who spent all Primary 1 singing "Jesus bits of shine with a pure clear light," can I?

"Jesus bids us shine with a pure clear light"

Hadn't heard the Thames station in the Lord's Prayer before either.

Here in Denmark we have some sweets called piratos - they are a bit like Pontefract cakes. A child was heard praying with conviction "crucified under tons of piratos" when of course he should have said " crucified under Pontius Pilate" in the Nicene creed.

As a young child at the end of each prayer - 'Our Men'. Well it was shortly after the war and I'd assumed it related to the military, having just moved into a new area, I was still getting used to the local accent.

While shepherds washed their socks at night.

My DD (now 35) used to sing “Freedom Whoa” to the band aid line feed the world. It’s stuck in our family now.

Niochorio - just saw your post, Desmond Deckers pronunciation has a lot to answer for!!??

I had s boyfriend back in the eighties who thought that the Jam's hit record was Eating Trifle.

More recently, Are we Human,or are we Hamster? has provided much amusement.

My grandaughter used to sing Noah’s brother built the arc instead of brother Noah etc. She once asked me what Noah’s brother was named.

Back in the seventies I used to gaily song “ oh, oh my ears are alight “ when I know know the word was ‘Israelites’ !!

I'm crying with laughter!!!
Not a lyric, just me crying with laughter!

In the National Anthem

"send her Victorias"

My GS as a toddler used to sing ‘glad tidings we bring to you and your kids’ (We wish you a merry Christmas)

'Spare him his life and his pork sausages.' Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen.

'Young girls with eyes like potatoes.' La Isla Bonita (I think) by Madonna.

No idea what either of them should be.

Nativity play
'The baby was born in a stapler'

Ekwanimitee the opera is Rigoletto, the aria is La donna è mobile and the "elephant's ears," which I think we have all heard, are: "e di pensier," meaning "and her mind" after "muta l'accento" = she changes her voice ... and her mind."

Ooh ooh me knees are alive - by Desmond Decker and the Israelites . ??

There’s a worm at the bottom of the garden
And his name is William Brew!