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Family rows over wedding dress

(88 Posts)
Newatthis Mon 02-Aug-21 15:33:52

Surely the bride to be should have the choice?

www.yahoo.com/entertainment/bride-accused-tearing-family-apart-205144370.html

Kaggi60 Wed 04-Aug-21 14:58:02

I got married and I brought my wedding dress off my friend. But what I got was hassle off her Dad all the time. He wanted it back and would not leave me alone but I did pay for it. We moved house was going to use it to Christing my first child but unfortunately I lost all my clothes that went mouldy even the wedding dress it was bad luck from the start. But at least I am still married just had our 40th.

annifrance Wed 04-Aug-21 13:06:02

first wedding 1970 a white dress chosen by my mother and I in Dickins and Jones (so regret to loss of that shop in Regent Street).

Second in 1987 a buttercup yellow and deep purple full on 80s dress and jacket with enormous padded shoulders, peplum, ruching, the lot!! very Dynasty but an iconic 80s outfit. I offered it to DD for an 80s party she was going to, she refused! Got good use out of it at the Cannes Film Festival for a few years.

Third in 2019, red jacket made by me for DMs funeral in 1998, a highly coloured skirt, cut off a dress by Diane Fries which had also had many airings at the Cannes Film Festival during the 80s.

No-one would have been able to influence me on what I wore, even at 20.. I said to parents that I insisted on choosing my dress and for my three bridesmaids, and they could do whatever else they wanted as it was the last thing I would do for them. (Little did I know how that would haunt me when they reached old age and Alzheimers and dimentia set in - then my entire days seemed to be around them despite being 70 miles away!)

Magrithea Wed 04-Aug-21 12:56:47

Watch 'Say Yes to the Dress'! all sorts of opinions from the poor bride's 'entourage' (parents, sibling, opinionated 'friends'). As everyone else has said, bride's day, her choice!!!

Lucca Wed 04-Aug-21 12:27:34

Georgesgran

I was married in 1972 and wore red. A Susan Small dress, bought by my beloved Gran from The French Salon in Fenwicks, Newcastle. Still have it!

That takes me back - Fenwicks French ! Did you also go to Bainbridges ? And have coffee in the Chattery?!

Hellogirl1 Wed 04-Aug-21 12:03:14

It was in 1986 Gabrielle, and ended in 2003. She chose her own dress for her second wedding in 2005.

Gabrielle56 Wed 04-Aug-21 09:21:30

That's good to know?

Gabrielle56 Wed 04-Aug-21 09:20:42

Agree with telling ma to butt out! I married in 1976 and wanted a monk's skullcap (all the rage) like my cousin's wife had worn a year earlier! I was cajoled and basically bullied-i was just 20- into buying a drippy veil! Yuk!! Hated it and still think it spoiled my Guinevere-sleeved high necked flowing dress! Silver lining? It got dragged through the gravy at the meal as I'd necked all the leftover sherries and couldn't care less!

annsixty Wed 04-Aug-21 09:18:41

Thank you Gabrielle56 for your kind advice to examine my conscience.
I really don’t need to and you would be the very last person I would want as a chum.

Gabrielle56 Wed 04-Aug-21 09:14:08

Hellogirl1

I once saw a beautiful all black wedding dress at an exhibition, but my daughters were horrified when I suggested black for their weddings, but like has been said, Bride`s choice.
When daughter 2 went shopping for her dress, her fiance went with her, as, in his words "You`re not walking down the aisle in something I don`t like"! And she actually bought his choice!

"

Sounds like he's already controlling every little decision the poor girl makes.oh dear, good luck with that one..

Gabrielle56 Wed 04-Aug-21 09:12:32

annsixty

Well I for one didn’t like the dress and if I were the bride’s mother I would be disappointed but that would be as far as it would go.
It is the bride’s right to choose her own dress and that should be respected by all.

Disappointed? Really? Your love and 'approval' hinges on a bleeding frock? Sorry chum but you need to seriously examine your conscience....

Gabrielle56 Wed 04-Aug-21 09:10:21

I'm thinking this is in USA? All that guff about virgins and whores?! Ha ha! Bride and groom's day, they can do what the Dickens they wish! Anyone who don't like it need not attend.i thank you!

sweetcakes Tue 03-Aug-21 21:17:40

Elope that will teach her family.

GreenGran78 Tue 03-Aug-21 20:14:21

The poor girl is in a very difficult situation, especially if her family is paying for the wedding. She sounds American, and perhaps lives in a place where everyone is very ‘religious’ and doesn’t want to break the local traditions. They certainly aren’t behaving in a Christian way!
Unfortunately she has to decide whether sticking to her guns, and wearing the dress, is worth the consequences. They will probably make the wedding into a miserable affair. Even if she gives way they have succeeded in taking all the joy out of the occasion.
What hateful people they are.

suttonJ Tue 03-Aug-21 19:44:41

Weddings! Nothing but stress and arguments. Why does anyone bother?

Lucca Tue 03-Aug-21 19:17:32

I can’t see the dresses just some brief film

coastalgran Tue 03-Aug-21 18:45:39

Watch the film 27 Dresses and you will see the horror stories of the brides and bridesmaids dresses. It is ultimately the bride's choice so that however many years down the line she can look back and go "did I really wear that." The best dresses are the ones that are classic, Princess Grace of Monaco, Lady Kitty Spencer last weekend, Duchess of Cambridge.

JadeOlivia Tue 03-Aug-21 16:39:41

Never in a million years would I allow someone to influence my choice, never.

CleoPanda Tue 03-Aug-21 16:29:22

Is it this one?

Hellogirl1 Tue 03-Aug-21 16:26:18

LynneH, the marriage didn`t last, he left with someone else after 17 years, but was seeing the other woman for 3 years before that. She`s now remarried to a nice man, and chose her own dress.

Dinahmo Tue 03-Aug-21 15:11:24

eazybee

This is what makes Say Yes to the Dress so fascinating to watch; all the family disagreements with mom, sisters, bridesmaids, sometimes brothers, occasionally fathers, bridegrooms and gay best friends, all of whom have their own agenda which has very little to do with what the bride wants, or actually suits her.

I watch this occasionally. To my taste the dresses are usually horrible and cost a fortune. They are so over the top they make Lady Di's dress quite tasteful.

LynneH Tue 03-Aug-21 15:06:24

Hellogirl1

I once saw a beautiful all black wedding dress at an exhibition, but my daughters were horrified when I suggested black for their weddings, but like has been said, Bride`s choice.
When daughter 2 went shopping for her dress, her fiance went with her, as, in his words "You`re not walking down the aisle in something I don`t like"! And she actually bought his choice!

"

Well, he sounds far too controlling for my liking. And he’s not supposed to see her or the dress before the event

Cossy Tue 03-Aug-21 15:01:41

I personally think it’s no ones business except the bride, unless of course it’s the price and someone else paying !!

timetogo2016 Tue 03-Aug-21 14:44:31

Wow aysc,i didn`t know that.
Thank you for that info.

Summerlove Tue 03-Aug-21 14:25:38

If it’s not the dress, it’s the guest list, or venue, or the meal.

The poor couple get so many opinions thrown at them?

bobbydog24 Tue 03-Aug-21 14:15:09

My daughter married in a red and gold wedding dress with bridesmaids in the same material without the gold. Everyone commented on how beautiful they all looked.
It’s her day, why should anyone else have an opinion.