A few minutes of tv . I am now an arch-criminal

MittensMum

Sorry BlueBelle, lost my concentration for a moment.

BlueBelle

Than goodness my children NEVER EVER dictated what I should or shouldn’t do with my grandkids when I had them They knew I brought them up well and completely trusted my judgement I think it’s outrageous to be so structured
If yours want free child care from a trusted person then they need to relax
If they want it all so perfect do it themselves I feel cross on your behalf

Your house, your rules and if they don’t like it there’s always nursery school. Blinking cheek.

Free or not I would have shown my children the door if they dared to tell me off like that. I don't know how you manage to look after them for so long. I'm 70 and mine would be watching more than 20 minutes. Tell your children you either look after them your way or not at all. And don't let them speak to you disrespectfully.

I looked after various grandchildren 5 days a week up until I was 68, 10 years ago, but I certainly couldn`t do it now. They were allowed to watch children`s TV whenever they wanted, but it wasn`t that much because they`d get bored with it.

I absolutely sympathise with you! My own DC learnt so much from TV, and I used to love snuggling down with them at the end of the day to watch a film or programme.
As is the way of the world, they have rebelled against their own upbringing and issued a fatwah on all television for their own children. (No matter that they can play mindless video games whilst eating meals....don't get me started!)
I looked after a young GS from the age of 11 months to 18 months 3 times a week and strictly complied with the parents' wishes. On his last day, he accidentally stepped on the remote control and the 60 inch TV on the wall (rented apartment), sprang into life. He nearly passed out with astonishment!

Than goodness my children NEVER EVER dictated what I should or shouldn’t do with my grandkids when I had them They knew I brought them up well and completely trusted my judgement I think it’s outrageous to be so structured
If yours want free child care from a trusted person then they need to relax
If they want it all so perfect do it themselves I feel cross on your behalf

Hi MittensMum. DGD has stayed here 2 days and overnight this week (school holidays), and afterwards I was very tired.
She's been part of my life her whole life, she's really good, sleeps well, but it's tiring. I'm younger than you, and haven't done 2 days a week regularly since she was tiny.
Simply put, granny's house, granny's rules.

I've never heard such nonsense.
For Goodness sake,
I'd have just laughed in the DP's faces and said
'If it doesn't suit then get paid child care'
Me and DH gave both of our DC's 3 days a week free child care(3 kids in all)
We always asked for their guidance re. feeding etc but if they'd have kicked up a fuss about such a silly thing then they would be looking elsewhere.
CBeebies is great.
We miss it now the DGC's are now at secondary school.

Sometimes my childminder used to do 'stuff' I thought she wouldn't do, like her husband taking my son to the off licence
They need to get a grip

I agree with lemongrove, there's a reason 70 year olds don't have their own toddlers, and how many childcare facilities look for 70 year old staff? I'd be telling them that all day is just too tiring without some rest time, so you'll be having to reduce to just mornings from now on. I'd bet that would concentrate their minds that perhaps half an hour of suitable children's TV isn't such a bad thing. I could not do all day care for 3 days a week even with a half hour rest. Toddlers are exhausting!

You really need to question this baby sitting malarkey. If you can't allow the child a few minutes TV time then just tell them they will have to look elsewhere.

I'm 10 years younger than you and couldn't cope with a toddler 3 days a week.

It's just too much, especially if you are subject to unreasonable rules.

My children would have nodded off though M0nica and then problems at bedtime would probably crop up.

There's more to watching TV than "watching TV" I think.

Our children often forget that we are getting older and do not have the energy and strength to keep going all day, let alone three days running.

I would tell your DD and spouse that you cannot cope with the amount of care they expect, it is too exhausting and if they insist that you be on the go all day for three days, then they had better find care elsewhere. Alternatively negotiate how much tv he can watch each day and what programmes, while you have a chance to sit down with him

As for the idea that it will make him have temper tantrums and behave badly for the rest of the day, I have never heard such ridiculous nonsense. That will only happen if you let him watch violent and unpleasant movies. There is nothing on children's tv, at least not in this country to wind up a small child.

If the arrangement was "no TV" I wouldn't do it. I definitely wouldn't try to do it secretly.

If you feel you need the TV to child-mind for half an hour, I would say so.
If they don't like it, I suggest you ask them to please pick up the little one earlier so you are less exhausted.

I think all you grandparents who have children day after day are extraordinary. I couldn't do it!

Are you happy to go on looking after him for this amount of time or would you like to cut it down.
I think the parents would notice the difference if they had to find the money to pay for even one of those days.

I used to look after my grandson 5 days a week till he went preschool. He spent quite a lot of time watching television, either on his own or with me. Didn't stop him doing very well at school and knowing all sorts of stuff.

I think you’re doing a wonderful job looking after your grandchild for 3 days a week. I don’t think I could do it quite honestly. As other posters have said I would be looking to reduce your child minding hours. They expect too much of you. What is it about parents today who seem to expect grandparents to take on such responsibility and then criticise them for allowing a child 20 mins of TV time.

Repeat after me:

Your House; Your Rules. My House; My Rules. Don't agree with it? Find someone else to look after your child for free.

I was helping with my twin GD for over two years I really enjoyed it. But it was so tiring I struggled with the long days and I was not that quick getting around after them because of arthritis.

The family are lucky to have you I would have to say something I couldn’t let it go. Our DC can sometimes forget we have done it before and we know what’s right and wrong. Watching tv for a short time is not going to harm a child and you deserve a break.

eazybee

a) If I was looking after a child for three days, presumably unpaid, I would expect to be allowed discretion about the activities he was offered.
b) I would seriously consider reducing the hours I give in voluntary childcare.
c) I would not allow my children to give me a 'right royal telling off' for looking after their child.
The cheek of it.

My thoughts exactly.

I look after my grandson one day per week, I'm 61, working part time and I get tired!
Consider asking the parents what their childcare day consists of..... including ideas for quiet time...as the child requested screen time..... surely he watches at home?!

You are fantastic!

We look after our grandson regularly. Full days occasionally 5 days a week. I am 59 and dh 61. We can find it exhausting at times. My son (his dad) is understanding of the fact that he has screen time sometimes as he himself says that he goes to work for a rest.

I would suggest to them that you are finding it too tiring to go all day without a break and need to cut down to one or two days per week.

It’s exhausting dealing with inquisitive toddlers and I would think you both need a rest! Your house, your rules!

And I imagine your toddler grandson also needed to sit down quietly for a while!
I bet you've had a lovely day, try not to let this spoil it for you both.

I think his parents would find that professional childcare involved some compromises to their rigid requirements as well ?

My DGD had half an hour of TV while I was cooking their dinner.
The only problem with that is that they could nod off for a few minutes; with one it was fine, she would go to sleep at 7pm but with the other a five minute nap would give her enough energy to last until 9 or 10 o'clock at night.

If we took her home she would sometimes nod off in the car and we'd have to sing very very loudly if I saw her eyelids drooping.

I can understand it but there's no need to lecture you and talk about respecting their wishes - perhaps one of them can pick him up earlier?