Do you think 4 children is a ‘big family?’

My mom was one of 5 and my dad one of 6. My maternal grandmother had terrible bladder issues due to the pregnancies but the Dr would not send her for treatment ( he had very old fashioned views) in case she wanted more!

i knew somebody that was the youngest of 19 , 17 surviving. The only reason the family did not get any larger was because her dad died when she was a baby.

Blondiescot with the age of many first-time parents increasing (in the West) and levels of fertility decreasing I’m afraid the choice to have children at all is diminished for some.

I think four is a big family in the UK these days. DH and I decided on two because we were concerned about overpopulation, and that was in the sixties!
I agree with MOnica on that subject.

kittylester

Granmarderby10

I don’t believe so very many women actually wanted more than 2 or 3 babies. Catholic doctrine aside, effective contraception has been the game changer for most.

Well, I certainly wanted lots!

would you really have wanted 17 though? (which I think was the highest number on this thread) or double figures? if I'd have relied on no contraception, I'd have had one a year and would have died very young. I think if you choose to have a 'big' family with access to medicine and healthcare it is completely different

Contraception has been a game changer for most catholics as well.

kittylester, I think the point is choice. Maybe some did want a big family, maybe some didn't. Unfortunately, until relatively recent, for many, it wasn't their choice. Thankfully we do now have that.

I think it’s lovely to have four children as long as you can afford it, I think five is a big family, my husband is one of seven, I’m one of three

Granmarderby10

I don’t believe so very many women actually wanted more than 2 or 3 babies. Catholic doctrine aside, effective contraception has been the game changer for most.

Well, I certainly wanted lots!

I do think 4 is a big family by today's standards, however I'm mindful my husband had 4, including our two! Children and how many individuals decide to have, or don't have is highly personal in the way religious and political beliefs are imo. I imagine most parents of larger families have given the matter much consideration.

I've got four. Nice amount. Larger family than average but worked well for us.

I'm one of four! I think it is just about right. I always wanted 4 but it was not to be but feel blessed to have my 2 DC.
To me 6+ is a large family.

I don’t believe so very many women actually wanted more than 2 or 3 babies. Catholic doctrine aside, effective contraception has been the game changer for most.

I think three is big and four is very large. Five or six is unimaginable to me.

I think it depends on the size of family that you grew up in. We were both from three-child families - so having four didn't seem a 'big family' to us.

I'm one of three, I have two children as do my brother and sister. My DD has three children, my son none. My DH is one if six, his father was one of fourteen and his mother one of six, strangely his mother was the only one to have children. DH has three, his son has one boy and his older DD has two girls , his younger DD is expecting a girl in November.

I suppose that nowadays having 4 children in the UK would be perceived as a ‘large’ family.

I had ten siblings (split family so some half-brothers/sisters), however we have only produced 23 children between us. My own contribution was 5, but with a 19 year age gap between the oldest and youngest. I have 9 grandchildren, so none of mine have gone on to have big families, but the singletons meet up with cousins often enough that my two year old granddaughter always includes her four year old cousin when she draws her ‘family’. ?

I am an only child and would have loved lots of brothers and sisters. I am very envious of big families.

Yes, I think 4 is a big family these days, 2 or 3 seems to be the norm.
I am the youngest of 7 siblings, and DH is one of 4.
We have 3 sons, perhaps hoping the 3rd might be a girl, but no regrets.
We have 1 DGD and 1 DGS with our oldest, and 1 due next month with our middle son. Our 1st DIL is an only child and I think felt lonely sometimes growing up, which is probably why she wanted to have more.
It is good to have siblings with whom to share the joys and sorrows of life.

My father was one of 11, I am one of three. That was then. Nowadays I think 4 is a big family.

Although population growth is now being driven by longevity, rather than excess births (except in Africa). I think that, as a whole, the world has too many people in it and that optimum population, that enables, human, animal and plant life (and any other kind of life that exists) to live in harmony with other, is probably half the number we currently have and that to choose to have more than 2 children nowadays, except multiple births and one or two other rare occurences, is a little selfish and damaging to the environment.

I am 1 of 4 and my dad was one of 10, which raises even more eyebrows!
Even though his family had barely 2 pennies to rub together, hand me downs were quite normal, toys were shared, it meant that they all grew up really close and all got on well as they grew into adulthood .
Those that married into the family were absorbed and for my generation, it has always been seen the same way!

Each to their own Blondiscot but one of my DGC is an only and his DP are so wrapped up in him and everything he does that I can't help thinking he'll grow up like a Chinese little emperor. They are good about inviting friends round and so on but he is lonely.
Also when his parents need caring for it will be just him to make the decisions.

So many split homes these days that children have to be more resilient than ever and to learn to get along with step siblings .
I'm told on good authority, that the population here in Scotland is fairly static but more homes are needed because there are ever more households. One million people live alone or one in five..

I have 5 sons and 1 stepson so we have a big family. They eldest each have two children. It is hard work especially nowadays when everything’s so expensive and you can’t just throw them in the car . We are proud that They all have degrees . But We are conscious that we can’t help get them on the property ladder like others can because we’d have to help them all equally.

Sorry Blondiescot I missed your post, I feel exactly the same.

It is definitely a big family now. A lot of my youngest's child's friends parents have stopped at one. I don't know any that have had four.