Do you think 4 children is a ‘big family?’

Don't feel sorry for me Grammaretto I was quite happy being an only child. My husband has several siblings and there are always feuds going on. I'm happy for those people who like larger families but not for me. I don't have any other blood relatives apart from my children and grandchildren. It's not a problem for me.

Yes it is a big family now, I don’t know any younger couple who have, or aspire to have four children or more. You need a big car, holiday accommodation is more expensive, etc. as well as the logistics of looking after four children when both parents work, which most do - aspirations have changed.

Four is a big family and was considered so when I was growing up as one of four. Today you need a supersized car to carry more than three children so four is big! My nephew has four, but that wasn’t planned - the third was twins.

My parents were both only children. My dad in fact had been one of four but he was orphaned and his siblings all died young. I had no aunts, uncles or cousins and only one grandparent, growing up. It didn’t matter to me as a child but now, I wish I did have those connections. My mum says she always wanted a sibling but her mother wasn’t able to have any more babies.

I have four dc, two of each, spread over twenty one years. I have five and a half grandchildren, and will have three of each sex when the sixth arrives. My youngest is only 25 so no children yet.

My mum’s father was one of eight, but grandpa was the only one who had a child that survived to have their own children. Mum has one adopted cousin, too.

Jaxjacky

I think it will be, over population is the biggest threat to the world’s resources, but will never be a popular message.

I think that's actually because it's not really true and more complex than it sounds.

www.google.com/amp/s/amp.dw.com/en/overpopulation-climate-change-emissions/a-54725928

Yes, four is a lot. I was one of three and I have three, one girl and two boys. But there are too many people on this planet and apparently the way forward is to just have two children. Of my three, one has a daughter and the other two no children at all.

for 2021? yes.

I was one of eight it was a miserable poor child hood with no luxuries and many hungry days. Although both my parents worked and didn’t get hand outs but it was difficult.

I had two children I could easily afford but found it a struggle when I divorced being on my own.

If you can have lots of children and afford the expenses then it must be a joy. It’s everyones choice how many children they have. I think as long as they are able financially that’s fine.

My own DC have good jobs and want the best for their children. They are fortunate because both sets of grandparents help out with some expenses. We help out not because we have to but because we can and want too.

GrannyGravy13

We have 5 children, you just get used to the noise level when all AC and GC get together.
It is absolutely joyous ❤️❤️❤️

I agree. We have four and nearly eight grandchildren. Wouldn’t be without them. Life is fun and packed with excitement.

Grammaretto, don't feel sorry for only children. I'm an only child and wouldn't have wanted it any other way (and no, I wasn't spoiled - in fact, I think my mother was more strict because I was an only child). I can't remember ever wanting a brother or sister, and even now, I'm happier in my own company. My best friend at school was one of nine - and her house always seemed like chaos to me.

I so often love the 'throwaway comments'. can BlueSky (or anyone) tell me why it is " quite fashionable nowadays to add a fourth child"

My DD has 5 boys and 1 girl all off her hands now, she has seen 2 x boys through Uni and 2 x boys with good apprenterships my DGD training as a vet's nurse and no. 5 son just got 5 Alevel results so she has done a good job raising her "large" loving family.I also have 8 GCs and 2 x GGCs all doing well.My DD has always held down a full time job and instilled a strong work ethic into her children.

Anything over two is a big family to me, especially when we can control our fertility nowadays.

To me four is big. I’m one of two. When I was growing up most of my friends were either onlies or were one of two siblings. Occasionally there were three, but never knew of any families larger than that other than the family which fostered and so the numbers there varied! Now I have an only of my own, I know a few families with four and one with five.

We have 6 , offset by my siblings being childless , my lot complain about not having cousins !
I have 8 grandchildren

Average household has 2.4 children so 4 is large

My father was one of 10 which is apparently why I'm an only child! I found 2 was enough, DD has 2 because although they both have "good" jobs it's all she and her husband can afford. DS has 1 and can't afford that one!

momb, that's the way to do it!!

We have 3 daughters. I would have loved to have one more.
DD1 has a boy and DD3 has two boys. DD2 has no children.
I have a brother but DH is an only child.
My Mum was one of 3 and my Dad one of 5.
I have a friend who has six and one who has 4 but most have 2.
I hunk anything over 4 children is a large family.

I have 4 and was the only one in my group of friends to do so, so we were treated as 'the big family'.
Now many with one child say they regret it but never envied me at the time.

Yes, I do, but ok if you can afford it and enjoy having several children. My DH was one of 9, quite poor, living in a big old farmhouse with outdoor ‘hole in the wooden board’ loo and tin bath etc. His mother had her favourites amongst her offspring, but was a good, caring mother. She worked very hard, the cooking, cleaning, washing, must have been overwhelming, especially when she was always pregnant.

They were cared for, but not given much attention re their schooling and career choices.

I have 5 sons. No regrets! It was hard work having 5 under ten, especially as I had a career as well. We did live in a vicarage - DH was a vicar.

No 4 is fine.. My cousin has 6... 5 boys 1 girl. Not a problem.

Maybe it is by today's standards, but it is exactly what I wanted but was not able to have. I only managed two. I think those of you with 4 or 5 children are wonderful.

We always said we wanted to fill a vicarage but didn't realise that having 5 children meant that we wouldn't be able to afford the vicarage as well!

I was thinking of two children, and two boys came along. I would really have loved a girl, but even in those days I was thinking that it was only fair on the world population just to replace, not increase. However then my brother made it plain that he and his wife would never have children. She would have made an excellent mum, but he refused to go for tests. So we had a girl, and then because the fighting was always two onto one, we had a fourth!