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Where did my confidence go?

(126 Posts)
BlueBelle Fri 03-Sept-21 03:46:56

Today I m travelling alone (I usually do) ….. which necessitates a couple of trains and a bus, a premier inn overnight stay and a short early morning plane journey today (only one flight a day now since CoviD ) I ve done this journey many times before, (apart from the overnight stay) however you would think I was going to outer space I am so nervous Having to do some deep breathing exercises? obviously I haven’t been out my town for nearly two years and yes I am two years older but even so everything looks so unfamiliar, so different and inside I m a nervous wreck
Anyway else feel these kind of anxieties

Kim19 Fri 03-Sept-21 04:01:47

Not anxieties parcularly but a definite fragility which was once total confidence and is simply just a wee bit out of practice. I'm viewing a forthcoming trip with a small degree of trepidation whereas it would have been total joy pre Covid. You are definitely not alone.

Lucca Fri 03-Sept-21 06:21:33

Only to be expected Bluebelle! Exciting though, where are you going ?!

Juliet27 Fri 03-Sept-21 06:34:16

Yes Kim fragility is a good word to describe how I feel if I venture anywhere different now.

Calendargirl Fri 03-Sept-21 06:36:31

Like you, have hardly been out of my home area for ages. Have had to take DH to hospital 25 miles away, feels nerve wracking. Have to keep reminding myself “You can do this, stop being silly.”

Completely understand how you feel. TBH, not bothered if I never venture far again, which is daft I know.

Gingster Fri 03-Sept-21 07:03:07

Same here. Everything seems like a mountain to climb.

Jaffacake2 Fri 03-Sept-21 07:11:44

Hope you have a wonderful trip and a happy destination x

seacliff Fri 03-Sept-21 07:12:35

I'd feel nervous too, totally understandable, it has been a very unusual 2 years. We're all going to have to overcome these fears the first time we break out from our cage.

You seem a strong capable woman Bluebelle, and I'm sure after the initial butterflies, you'll sail through. Sorry, fly through.grin Hope it goes well and you enjoy the freedom.

Rosycheeks Fri 03-Sept-21 07:27:19

I feel stressed a lot lately. Car gets Mot nervous wreck( it passed) going to spec savers today feel nervous. Took some Kalms been taking them a lot lately. Dont know why.

Grandmadinosaur Fri 03-Sept-21 07:27:52

I know exactly how you feel as I feel this way too. I’ve always been out on day trips, overnight stays both alone and with friends. I renewed my rail card in May intending to get back to normal but I just haven’t got the confidence. The rail company had a flash sale last week of tickets for £1 each way. I’ve booked a couple but as they are so cheap if I don’t feel up to it I won’t go. Yes Bluebelle where had our confidence gone indeed. Hope your trip goes well today.

GrannyGravy13 Fri 03-Sept-21 07:30:13

Yep I know exactly what you mean.

I have had to push myself these school holidays to drive GS’s to places that I hadn’t been to, before Covid I wouldn’t have thought anything of jumping in the car with sat-nav and going far-a-field
I think confident me is still struggling to come out to play…

DanniRae Fri 03-Sept-21 07:38:44

Good Luck BlueBelle flowers

ginny Fri 03-Sept-21 07:50:41

Hope you enjoy your trip Bluebelle. I know just how you feel.
I find myself feeling apprehensive about so many things these days that would not have bothered me one jot before.
Determined to push myself to carry on with them and hope a feeling of confidence returns as I go along.

Blondiescot Fri 03-Sept-21 08:09:14

Oh BlueBelle, I totally understand what you mean! I used to think nothing of travelling on my car, whether that was by car, train or plane. Now, apart from going out to do essential shopping, I've not been out since the pandemic began, and it's only now that I'm starting to realise the toll this has taken on my mental health and my confidence. I see people going out shopping and socialising as if nothing has ever happened and wonder how they can do it. I hope your journey goes well and you're not too anxious to enjoy your trip.

MawBe Fri 03-Sept-21 08:10:47

With you on that BlueBelle - it’s entirely natural and I hope you can “feel the fear and do it anyway” . It will be fine, but the combination of being locked down and more isolated, plus (alas) being a couple of years older, will have undermined many people’s confidence.
Looking forward to hearing how it was all worth while when you are back! shamrock

rosie1959 Fri 03-Sept-21 08:14:42

This virus has had many more effects than just the illness itself and I think it spans all age groups. I haven’t been particularly apprehensive but I have noticed a relative loose her confidence and become more forgetful. She tells me it’s not the fear of Covid she is 89 but quite fit and still able to drive locally.
Time has changed my perception and of course the vaccination program

Juliet27 Fri 03-Sept-21 08:24:51

going to spec savers today feel nervous

I did that recently ^*Rosie*. The test wasn’t an ordeal but trying on glasses was. As I said elsewhere, any you try on now have to be put in a tray rather than put back for Covid reasons but it does have the effect of restricting freedom to choose easily.

kircubbin2000 Fri 03-Sept-21 08:49:50

I always feel like this even before covid. I feel I won't visit my daughter next time as the trip 2 years ago was a nightmare with the crowds.
When she was here last week I decided not to go out with them on their day trips and I missed a couple of family get togethers and meals.I felt relieved to have the house to myself again.

silverlining48 Fri 03-Sept-21 08:50:05

I am also reluctant to stray further than my very immediate area and feel nervous even thinking about going even a little further. Definitely am out of my comfort zone but when I do pluck up courage and succeed in small things I wonder why I worried.
Enjoy or endure your trip today and when you have done it, you will be happy and next time won’t be so bad,

seacliff Fri 03-Sept-21 08:58:34

I've found it very tempting to not go far, outside my comfort zone now. It's scary how easy it would be to just accept this new restricted life for evermore. But I did drive to London for a family reunion, I was nervous before hand. Once I'd done it I was fine. And I've had to go into office one day a week, done it twice now. Hated the thought, but the reality was ok.

Notinthemanual Fri 03-Sept-21 08:59:35

Some days I feel the same Bluebelle. To be honest I was already losing confidence before covid. When I'm wavering I tell myself I only need to go as far as the end of the road, I can turn back if I want to. I realise you can't do that exactly as you are committed to a whole trip, but maybe only thinking about each stage at a time might help.

Wherever you are off to, I hope you have a lovely time. Beating your nervousness will give you a bit a buzz too.

timetogo2016 Fri 03-Sept-21 09:10:38

Have a lovely trip Bluebelle.
What`s the betting as soon as you get back you will feel much happier.

Redhead56 Fri 03-Sept-21 09:24:18

I mentioned on another thread I went on my first train for nearly two years. It felt like a nightmare but it’s not unusual as we have all lead a sheltered life for ages. You will be fine enjoy your trip.

mokryna Fri 03-Sept-21 09:24:27

Bluebelle Last week I drove a two hour distance, I was a bit nervous beforehand and so were my ACs. This was me, only two summers ago I drove from Versailles up and round Scotland. My trip went fine, worrying about nothing and I am sure yours will. As they say it’s like riding a bike, though I would like to try that as roads are too busy. Where are you going to? Take care.

Washerwoman Fri 03-Sept-21 09:36:02

I'm currently waiting for a train to meet my DD in a nearby city and I feel like an alien !And next week I have a much longer train journey with 3 changes to go and stay with a friend. I've been feeling ridiculous for feeling nervous so you have my sympathy. I can't believe I used to fly alone and drive abroad without a care in the world. I think the last weird year plus has battered a lot of us confidence wise.Jope it all goes well.