Where did my confidence go?

Totally understand how you feel Bluebells. Last Summer I felt anxious driving 2 miles to sit in a friend's garden for a couple of hours! This year, after further restrictions, I've felt the same anxiety prior to very tame social interactions. It will take time to get back to 'normal'.

Glad I'm not alone. Am living in a hotspot city with low vaccination rates. None of this helps. Even worse Stagecoach has no mask mandate. Hubby with own mental health issues, I am seeking professional help. Take care all.

So relieved and grateful for all these posts, I seem to have lost so much confidence and it's reassuring to know that iy's not just me. Everything feels like a major hurdle to be overcome these dyas.

well I have never been much of a traveller compared to lots of you here. but yes, everyday travel, anxiety, and then losing the will to do anything. the latter I have to fight cos if I don`t get out, I feel worse... living on my own the last 2 years , ever in my long life, (over 80) I feel that I have aged 20 years. before, though I was over 80 I felt and acted and looked, so I am told like a 60 year old, not I feel my age... physically,
but mentally a completely changed person. no confidence, anxiety etc... as most everyone here has commented

I find the pressure to be optimistic, somewhat confusing, cos it so helps me to hear that others are like me, that I am NOT alone! so thank you all for your comments

I haven’t used public transport at all since Covid except for one occasion. I went to London on the train to meet a friend for afternoon tea. I felt very safe as there was hardly anyone on the train or in the restaurant. However I’m becoming more nervous as the numbers go up again, and am avoiding crowded places. I was very confident a couple of months ago, but the rising numbers are spooking me.

I can relate to so much here! I too still feel odd simply doing normal shopping,- only a short trip on public transport for me. I think it's because there are still so many remindes that C19 is still rife.

Not actually afraid of getting it - as it appears most of us will at some stage, and am double jabbed. It's more that life still isn't quite 'normal' yet, with masks, SD etc still here.

Forgot to say - it is SO helpful to realise there are many of us who feel this way. Confidence boosting in itself!

same here. it's weird I seem to have a phobia of leaving a 2 mile radius area...refuse to go on motorway etc. don't want to go on public transport. just drive with dogs to handful of woods and parks and supermarkets. It started when I got a diagnosis that meant I could theoretically drop dead at any time...this, and lockdown and covid fear has reinforced it, has made me reluctant to travel far alone. I hope I get over it. So great empathy there. I hope you have a good trip

I have always felt like this Bluebelle,even before covid. Had started doing hypnotherapy to help,and was making some progress, then covid came along. I know I must make the effort but keep making excuses not to things outside the home, unless they are easy and I feel in control of the situation.

COMPLETELY agree. and especially with Gingster who talks about 'Mountains to climb' which is just how I feel now.over the slightest challenge.
Before Lockdown I would drive over 200 miles up the M40 and M6 to Cheshire to see my elder daughter and family, but now I've completely lost my nerve. All this talk of the danger of 'Smart' motorways hasn't helped.

And even the thought of driving in the dark locally is worrying me.

Daughter has suggested that I go by train to see her but even that daunts me. I would worry the whole time about where I have to change trains and find the right platforms, and then that I get off at the right place.

As I've heard others say - my world has shrunk.

Totally agree with all the comments on here. I’m thinking about taking a few driving lessons or maybe contacting the Advanced Driving people. I’ve been driving for 40 plus years but just lately I’m not enjoying it.

I agree annie it is so helpful to know others are feeling the same
It’s not about CoviD for me, I feel quite confident with being vaccinated and using my common sense, that’s fine and I have been doing things within my own town all through the lean times, working, meeting friends, lunches etc (except for when we couldn’t) It’s just the total out of practice challenge of travelling almost as if I was a young child learning for the first time how to navigate moving out my own town without mum and dad
But I did do it with a lot of help from my eldest who navigated the website for bookings/ times and all the various CoviD forms (none of which were even looked at at the airport) and I wrote everything down in order to cross off as done very childlike normally I would do this all myself or even for others but suddenly I was a jelly believing I d get it all wrong and make mistakes It was the whole process that felt so daunting and I never thought 18 months/2 years would make such a huge difference to me
Onwards and upwards my friends we ve got each other to chew this over with, it helps

Bluebell yes I believe I have lost what confidence I thought I had still havent been anywhere but medical appointments.

I am experiencing exactly the same feelings of anxiety and at times panic. Busy town centres freak me out. Large supermarkets are no go. I have been driving for nearly 50 years but I am finding that difficult now. I really don't know where the old me has gone. Where do we look for help?

With respect, you do need to get out more. I haven't driven around my city for nealy two years when I was required to take my granddaughter to the station. I was terrified, couldn't remember my way around, the alterations around parking near the station absolutely threw me into a tail spin, cars honking at me. But this twenty mile journey was what was needed to get me up and going again. Arrived home exhausted, recovered eventually after glass (or two) or wine and the experience restored my confidence.

I am pleased I am not the only one that does not like to drive on smart motorways as I see several posters on here have said the same.
BlueBelle you have done amazingly well travelling on trains,
buses and a short flight even staying overnight at premier inn, so I hope you enjoy yourself wherever you are going.
I have not taken a train for about 8 years as never felt the need to and have not used buses for about 5 years. I drive fairly local although will do journeys of over 1 hour usually
familiar places for me. I will put the dogs in the car and go to large parks which to me is relaxing. One dog is very whingey in the car and cannot wait to get out the other one loves it and I could drive for hours and she would not mind.
I have thought about taking the train into Paddington and going to Portobello Road market where I have not been for awhile TBH the reason for not going is not the Covid but a fear of venturing too far because of the high crime rates of young people in and around London it is all a bit frightening to me.

BlueBelle I've travelled to Bristol by train a few times this year and it was fine but, when it came to resuming flying, I was quite nervous about the protocols. Like you, I hadn't flown, what had been a regular trip, for two years. I wasn't sure I'd remember what to do! In the event, I sailed through, even dealing calmly with the security people querying my 'liquids' because, it turned out, the plastic bag wasn't regulation size.... (They provided another one.) I'm sure you will have coped just as easily today. Everything will have just slotted into place. It's the anticipation that plays havoc with your confidence

I am due in October to go to London to see a show which we had booked to go to over 18months ago. I feel nervous even thinking about it. Getting on the train to London the underground then the theatre. I have to use a stick now and the thought of how much walking may be involved gives me anxious feelings, plus the ever present problem of .......where are the loo's!!!! Am going with my sister and two of my nieces so not alone, but dont want to be a nuisance to any of them. I wasnt as bad mobility wise when we booked the show. I think this may my last trip to London.

You sound as if you have the confidence to do things. My husband died six years ago and i lost all my confidence. Its gradually coming back but I would still be very anxious about travelling on my own.

I have a trip in a few weeks involving two train journeys and a concert. I haven’t been on a train since December 2019 and only twice in a bus since then. I am also very nervous, but how reassuring to know that many others are feeling the same. To top it all, I’m currently recuperating after a broken leg! It should be healed well enough by then, but it’s adding another layer of anxiety.

Like washerwoman I’m on a train journey. First in 20 months. Surprised that trains are very yusy. 2 nights in London hotel. Yes it’s scared but hopefully the more we do it the quicker it will become normal again. Have fun!

I surprised myself yesterday going to Ealing with my dd for the day; I sat outside an Italian restaurant in the 'sunshine' with a beer while she went off to an appointment and really felt like I'd had a good day out! I didn't drive though, that would have been a completely different matter. I would have spent the whle time stressing out about having to drive home.

Bluebell - you did it, in spite of anxiety - I think that's great. And I think you probably know that the anxious self talk is really words, not The Truth! I hope that having written about it may be helping you mentally step back and see the fears more clearly as the thoughts they are - not reality. I hope you have a great time, wherever you are going.

I've felt the same. Don't want to meet new people. Had to drive through Belfast last week and was a nervous wreck. My problem is that hubby drives every time we go out.

It seems you're not alone from the replies above and I understand exactly how you feel. I had a very short trip to make a couple of weeks ago and even had to resort to the Immodium I was in such a. state. Take care and hope all goes very smoothly.