Staying on topic- threads in general

trisher

FarNorth

The husbands themselves claim that George or Alfred no longer exist.
That is surely the definition of a widow : a woman whose husband no longer exists.

I think trisher that you are underestimating the distress felt by women in that situation.

I think you are underestimating the distress felt by real widows .

I think you are dismissing the distress felt by transwidows who not only lose their husbands, but many feel their married life has been a lie, a sham. You don't get to tell them how bad their distress is. It's not Top Trumps in the grief stakes.

I don't know what I think about "transwidows" as a term but I can see it must be incredibly painful for some..

I would still love and support a partner in that scenario, I don't know how/if my feelings would change romantically etc but I don't think I would see myself as widowed because the love wouldn't die just due to that.

I'm not sure what my husband would think about me talking about this lol

Doodledog

Is there a whiff of widowphobia in the air? ?

It certainly seems so. Transwidows are widows, they've lost the husband they had, that person no longer exists. To compare them unfavourably by referring to 'real' widows is to deny their pain and need to grieve for what was, but can no longer be.
Another loss is to any children, they've lost their dad, and been presented with another woman in their lives, how confusing must that be?

FarNorth

The husbands themselves claim that George or Alfred no longer exist.
That is surely the definition of a widow : a woman whose husband no longer exists.

I think trisher that you are underestimating the distress felt by women in that situation.

I think you are underestimating the distress felt by real widows .

The husbands themselves claim that George or Alfred no longer exist.
That is surely the definition of a widow : a woman whose husband no longer exists.

I think trisher that you are underestimating the distress felt by women in that situation.

Is there a whiff of widowphobia in the air? ?

I don't see what's wrong with 'transwidows'. There isn't always some hope if someone's still living, of a new relationship, 'where there's life is hope' isn't true for everyone.

I don't see how the term 'transwidows' is harmful to anyone. Pain is pain and suffering is suffering. Regardless of how a relationship comes to an end, whose to say one person's pain and suffering is any greater or less than anyone else's.

But it doesn't really matter what you think they should call themselves does it trisher? They are whatever they say they are. They can identify how so ever they wish can't they? If they want to identify as transwidows, lesbowidows or gaywidows, that's their prerogative isn't it? We none of us need any one else's approval now, remember?

Are you conceding that language is important then? And that colonising words reduces their original meaning?

How about if I asked what the terminology took away from actual widows? Or told them that they could still choose to be known as such, but ‘transwidows’ allowed inclusivity and was harming no-one?

I think it's an insult to real widows who will never again be able to communicate in any way with their dead husband. Any relationship break up is traumatic and hurtful, but if the other party is still living there is always some hope of a new relationship . Real widows have no hope of that. What should we call women whose husband go off with another woman and refuse to speak to them? Or even someone whose other half goes off with someone of the same sex? Lesbowidows, Gaywidows? They are not widows unhappy as they might be.

The sheer level of knowledge, research, reference links and information available on the Feminism & Gender discussion boards on MN is incredible Galaxy, I've learnt so much on there. Despite asking GNHQ, several times, for a feminist discussion forum on here and being told, several times, that it's being discussed, we still don't have one.

The transwidows are one of the reasons I cheerlead for MN and GN in the face of criticism. They gave a space to women who desperately needed a space to talk and MN defended that space with absolute ferocity.

No, Chewbacca, I wasn’t expecting a response?

Doodledog. a very valid point but I don't think TAs and their supporters do irony.

Very much better than any "cute kitty" pics FarNorth thanks for sharing.

And to suggest that it is ‘a bit much’ for those women to choose their own name for the condition imposed on them, whilst simultaneously insisting that transpeople have the right to change the language in the name of inclusivity is deeply ironic, surely?

Ah, thanks, Galaxy ?

https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202110/medium-16195-screenshot-20211008-222105.png https://www.gransnet.com/uploads/talk/202110/medium-263032-244773746-3182972601922575-5472470425276933096-n.jpg

I was looking for a cute pic but found these.
I'll keep looking for a cute one.

trisher

I only know the last question I asked was about them calling women whose husbands transitioned Transwidows. I thought it was a bit much.
More bunny pictures? This thread is going to go!

Why do you think it's a bit much?
The men those women were married to no longer answer to their 'deadnames' because they claim those people don't exist anymore.
The women therefore feel that they are widows.
The women call themselves that, they were not named it by anyone else.

www.adulthumanfemale.store/apparel-1?page=2

I am not sure if it really works as an insult but to be clear, because people view it as one there is no way I would use it as one and risk alienating people I actually genuinely like and have time for even though we don't agree on trans issues.

I see your cat and I raise you with a kitten....

A lot of people would describe perfectly reasonable views about biological sex, as seen often on GN, as being terfy.
And would describe the people holding those views as terfs.
Many feminists are happy to take the stance "Yes, I am a terf if that means someone who understands what biological sex is, and supports women's rights."

cat for a change

I have looked at a lot of rabbits today to be fair maybe more than I have ever looked at

I only know the last question I asked was about them calling women whose husbands transitioned Transwidows. I thought it was a bit much.
More bunny pictures? This thread is going to go!