Gransnet forums

Chat

What happened to the man I met 52 years ago

(35 Posts)
kittylester Sun 14-Nov-21 19:56:06

He was just out of university where, despite coming out with 2 degrees, he had had a rip roaring student experience. grin

Prior to going to university he had led his (public) school out on strike, been on numerous student marches and was often in trouble at school much to his parents' despair.

Last night, he happily drank 'tea' made by an 8 year old, listened to a 10 year old read a story she had written, having already taken them to the pizza shop to choose a take away and then he cooked me a curry.

He has matured quite well.

Kim19 Sun 14-Nov-21 20:01:51

Sounds absolutely lovely and a perfectly gentle transformation. Maybe, just maybe, you played a small part in moulding this treasure?!!

Chewbacca Sun 14-Nov-21 20:05:30

Quite agree Kim19; "behind every great man is an even greater woman"!

Marydoll Sun 14-Nov-21 20:13:53

You are correct there Chewy. The women behind the throne! wink

Urmstongran Sun 14-Nov-21 20:43:02

What a lovely thread kitty..

I’ve known Himself 50 years. When we met I was 17y and he was 19y. Babies really, looking back.

Yesterday he made a huge pan of chilli to save both me and our daughter having to cook Sunday lunch as today would have been my mum’s 90th birthday. Almost four years on we all miss the matriarch of the family and although ‘next up’ I’m only doing my best.

Plus it was lovely listening to his kindness yesterday. He set up ‘Mousetrap’ (who on earth has the patience for those fiddly plastic pieces?’) to amuse L’il Miss. Then half an hour later our Boy Wonder wandered in saying ‘can we play chess grandad?’.

My heart melts.
This is the person who, in 1972 had platform shoes, long hair and sideboards (think ‘Slade’) and chewed gum (ugh!).

Every now and again when I awake I look over to his pillow and think ‘who is this old bugger lying next to me?’.

He must think the same. We are no longer young with dreams and plans.

And then I remember.
He’s the man I love. Who puts us all first. Who shows his love not in words but by being a provider. Dependable and true, over those years. My sweetheart.

Who irritates the life out of me sometimes.
As I’m sure I do him.

Shinamae Sun 14-Nov-21 20:49:52

Urmstongran

What a lovely thread kitty..

I’ve known Himself 50 years. When we met I was 17y and he was 19y. Babies really, looking back.

Yesterday he made a huge pan of chilli to save both me and our daughter having to cook Sunday lunch as today would have been my mum’s 90th birthday. Almost four years on we all miss the matriarch of the family and although ‘next up’ I’m only doing my best.

Plus it was lovely listening to his kindness yesterday. He set up ‘Mousetrap’ (who on earth has the patience for those fiddly plastic pieces?’) to amuse L’il Miss. Then half an hour later our Boy Wonder wandered in saying ‘can we play chess grandad?’.

My heart melts.
This is the person who, in 1972 had platform shoes, long hair and sideboards (think ‘Slade’) and chewed gum (ugh!).

Every now and again when I awake I look over to his pillow and think ‘who is this old bugger lying next to me?’.

He must think the same. We are no longer young with dreams and plans.

And then I remember.
He’s the man I love. Who puts us all first. Who shows his love not in words but by being a provider. Dependable and true, over those years. My sweetheart.

Who irritates the life out of me sometimes.
As I’m sure I do him.

That is so lovely ?

Calendargirl Sun 14-Nov-21 20:51:26

We are lucky aren’t we, to have them?

It’s not Mills and Boon, it’s no Hollywood blockbuster, it’s just having a kind, supportive, caring other half, without whom we would feel only half human.

“Grow old with me, the best is yet to be”.

Lizzie72 Sun 14-Nov-21 21:22:57

”Grow old with me, the best is yet to be”

My DH once gave me a card with that written on it smile

We, too, met 52 years ago.

Bluebellwould Sun 14-Nov-21 21:57:57

I met and married my husband within ten weeks in the summer of 1978. We were married for 40 years and 3 months until cancer took him from me.
In the first card he ever gave me before our wedding he wrote
“The love that I have is all that I have, and all that I have is yours”. And so it turned out to be.
I’m in tears writing this, god I miss him so much.

MissAdventure Sun 14-Nov-21 22:04:43

smile
This is so lovely to read, but I'm sorry for your loss, Bluebellwould.

denbylover Sun 14-Nov-21 22:09:59

It’s not really about roses on. Valentines day is it?, although if that is important to you so be it. We are 47years in, and the kind shy country boy I married is still a bit diffident but every single evening he comes in he’s smiling. He’s a doer a provider, not one for flowery comments, but he’s as open and honest as the days long. He’s respectful and true. Yes we’ve got the wrinkles and the grey hair but they’re nothing compared to what we do have. Thankful oh yes, very very much.

I love the line quoted above “grow old with me the best is yet to be” that’s beautiful.

nanna8 Sun 14-Nov-21 22:10:15

I was 15 when I met my husband and 19 when we married. We had 4 children and now have many grandchildren and 3 great grandchildren. He was an academic engineer until he retired and I was a teacher and then a social worker. We have been together more years than I can count, the 50 th is just a memory. We both changed over the years of course- like I grew up and found my way in life and so did he. We have had a wonderful life, couldn’t ask for more and travelled all over the place. Now we are content to discover our own country which is huge enough to keep us going forever. He has had a melanoma which would have killed him except that I nagged him and nagged him to get it looked at so they caught it before it spread. Sometimes nagging pays a!

BigBertha1 Sun 14-Nov-21 22:13:32

I've met kittylesters DH and can confirm he was quite a catch. Lovely family.

BigBertha1 Sun 14-Nov-21 22:16:49

DH has spent almost 43 years coping with my paranoia, neuroses, obesity and generalised strangeness whilst encouraging my career and mopping up my various health problems. He says it's an adventure. Nice man.

Luckygirl Sun 14-Nov-21 22:19:15

It is lovely to read these stories.

Makes me sob ..... my quiet, witty, intelligent, musical man was lost to Parkinsons - the wonderful mature man he might have become turned into a sick and mad person for several years before he went. Unrecognisable.

Treasure what you have.

Luckygirl Sun 14-Nov-21 22:22:22

It is lovely to read these stories.

Makes me sob ..... my quiet, witty, intelligent, musical man was lost to Parkinsons - the wonderful mature man he might have become turned into a sick and mad person for several years before he went. Unrecognisable.

Treasure what you have.

kittylester Sun 14-Nov-21 22:22:23

I am so sorry if this thread has upset you bluebellwould

I was really just reflecting on how the rebel I married turned into a great big softie. Not that I thought about what he might be like in the future- I was in lust.

kittylester Sun 14-Nov-21 22:22:24

I am so sorry if this thread has upset you bluebellwould

I was really just reflecting on how the rebel I married turned into a great big softie. Not that I thought about what he might be like in the future- I was in lust.

Nannytopsy Sun 14-Nov-21 22:45:16

GN was double posting this morning. Still happening I see!
What a lovely thread kitty!
He had hair - quite long hair when we met 47 years ago. There was a thin patch on top, we he assured me was due to pressure from his motorcycle helmet. And I believed him!!
Now we have a son who looks just like his Dad and is also balding! We have a daughter who looks just like her mother and only looks at food to put on weight!
We are so easy together and I can honestly say we have never had a row.
Please may it last until we are very old.

harrigran Sun 14-Nov-21 22:56:46

What a lovely story kitty.

Luckylegs Sun 14-Nov-21 22:59:51

Never had a row? Oh if only…… we’ve been married for 52 years as well and barely a day goes by without us having ‘words’, if not a full blown row! He is soooo irritating, awkward, contrary, argumentative, boorish sometimes and an absolute pig! Many friends laugh at this description but they end up agreeing if they spend any length of time in his company!

I am of course, equally irritating, argumentative etc etc and we barely agree about anything - vote opposite in any and everything, can argue the hind leg off anyone, and all that and yet, I love him more now than I have ever done and would be lost without him, literally, because I seem to be losing my marbles and memory quite quickly!

Bluebellwould Sun 14-Nov-21 23:24:43

You didn’t upset me at all Kitty. It is so lovely to have a nice thread for a change and a chance to read about all the lovely husbands out there. Just because mine and many others have gone doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy reading about other lovely people. At the end of the day the only thing that matters is love.

Kate1949 Mon 15-Nov-21 00:23:53

He sounds lovely kitty. I have a similar one. I am both grateful and
fearful if that makes sense.

kittylester Mon 15-Nov-21 06:29:32

Oh, it so does kate.

Kandinsky Mon 15-Nov-21 07:29:09

I met my husband in 1980 when we were both just 17. Both so young & full of hopes & dreams. We went on to have 4 children & he’d carry them all up to bed on his back, pretending to be a lion. They absolutely loved it! he was so strong he even told me to jump on once!
I can still hear their laughter.
Now he can barely walk up the stairs on his own without getting out of breath.

It’s already sad.