Should you let guests know you're not cooking traditional Christmas Dinner

I'd be really disappointed if I was expecting a lovely roast dinner and it didn't materialise.
It's my favourite meal.

Yes, I think you should mention that it’s not the traditional fare when the invitation is made. It would not, necessarily, make me turn down the invite but I would have to ask (tactfully, I hope) if I could bring something alternative for me as both Indian and Vegan food make me very ill. I’m doing turkey for 11 of us this year and also a vegan meal for my son.

Surely it's only polite to let people know what you'll be cooking if you're eating together? Some people suffer from allergies and we all have likes and dislikes and on Christmas Day it's not unreasonable to expect a traditional meal. Your guests may prefer to have the time and opportunity to make other arrangements.

No, don’t let them know what you will be serving, surprise them with a kipper.

Help! Sorry, my typing went berserk.. "Like others we have a big piece of gammon..."

I think yes, guests should be told that they are being invited for dinner on Christmas Day, and not for Christmas Dinner.

If I was invited out for Christmas dinner (I wish!) I would have the expectation of the usual roast turkey or other meat, the usual trimmings etc. I wouldn't refuse to go if that wasn't what was being served, but I would like to know in advance.

If we ever served anything other than Christmas Dinner and were inviting someone from outside of the family, I would let them know what was planned.

I should add that we normally have a cockerel rather than a turkey, though we do have a turkey crown too as my DH likes dry white meat. Like itgersxwe have a big piece of gammon over Christmas too. We usually finish the turkey breast as a turkey Dhansak during the following week.

My family would be very disappointed as they all love a traditional Christmas meal, though we do offer an alternative to the pudding as some don't like it.
I also love curry, but would definitely not be keen to have a vegan meal.
We spent Christmas in Kashmir on a houseboat in 1983 and were served chicken and roast potatoes followed by "English pudding", a yellow steamed pudding with jam and a white sauce which we were told was the traditional Christmas meal for the English, some of whom still lived in the area.

I think its generally a good idea and polite to let people know what they will be eating i case its something they can't or don't eat....and the less well you know the people, the more information you (and they) should give.

If as some think it's all about the company, why bother with food at all! Clues in the invite "sharing a Christmas dinner, " not "sharing some time gossipping and messing about a bit?!"

Surely the point of a Christmas dinner is not what you have to eat but the getting together of friends and relatives to celebrate by basically overindulging in food. I wouldn't care what was on offer.

No one is dictating what someone should or not cook in their own home Tanjamaltija. The majority of people associate a meal on Christmas day with the traditional turkey, so IMO if you've invited people for Christmas day dinner, and are not doing a traditional meal, you should say so when the invitation is given.

Hithere

For me, sharing a meal is about the company, not about the menu

The food can be excellent and matching the theme of the day but if company sucks, that is a reason to decline the invite

I agree but good friends would know what would be a delight for friends, and not try to shock

Some of the comments here sound as if a person who accepts an invitation to dinner, does so for the food, and not for the pleasure of the company and a shared meal, and the honour of being invited to be a part of a small community. You can cook a turkey on any day of the year, really, in your own house, but you cannot dictate what others cook / serve, in their own house.

How come it's now the tradition to bash anything traditionally "British" ?? Our food has been rubbished by the rest of the world(how they know what our foods like anyway?) Our history is shameful and cruel, we were the sole perpetrators of all evils in the past! Our values are tarnished by cries of "colonialist!!" What's going on? People may eat whatever they so wish for Christmas dinner .......but to impose ones choice without warning on others is tasteless(see what I did ther?)
As I always SAY-FLIPPIT how would a veggie/vegan like it if you served up/subjected them a trad. Turkey dinner? With NO alternative? Or maybe that person with a problem with allergies were told that prawns/nuts/gluten roast was the main dish? Think of others, vegan/veggies impose their tastes on everyone else but scream blue murder if you look sideways at a sausage!if you're SO good at being a bit different, try doing a menu and take on the task of cooking multiples as per guests choices?! Now thats clever!

Yes, before you invite them. Ie We are having an Indian would you like to join us! My answer would be "i have been invited to so and so's but thanks ?

For me, sharing a meal is about the company, not about the menu

The food can be excellent and matching the theme of the day but if company sucks, that is a reason to decline the invite

Yes, let potential guests know before asking them. Even if they already know about your own meal preferences, it's just common manners to point out that it won't be traditional.

If I invited guests for Christmas dinner and decided at any point not to serve whatever meal is traditional, I would most decidedly tell my guests so in advance and give them the option of refusing.

Part of Christmas is the traditional meal. I would be horribly disappointed if any member of my family had served something that in no way resembled the traditional meal.

In the past, when inviting someone for the first time for Christmas, I mentioned when extending the inviation that in my family we eat roast duck with boiled red cabbage, potatoes and sauce, followed by the traditional Danish dessert. Some families eat goose, others roast pork, and I would have hated a guest to be disappointed.

I do think if someone is having an 'alternative' Christmas Day meal, they should say what they're planning, before inviting guests who can then either accept or politely decline the invite.

Most people would probably expect a traditional turkey with all the trimmings, and may be disappointed with an Indian takeaway, which they could have any day of the week.

Saying that, if we were invited to DS, or DDs for Christmas Day, and they weren't cooking turkey, I'd be happy with anything they offered. However, we always do the full turkey & trimmings, and I know that they'd be the first to complain if I decided to offer them an alternative!

I think I’d like to know. Christmas is a special occasion. Indian takeaway is not. I’m happy to embrace a vegan Christmas but well, Indian takeaway is just not special.

I think you should. Christmas is an occasion. Indian takeaway is not. I could embrace the vegan option as that is a lifestyle decision and I’m sure it could be made special. I’m always up for something new. But Christmas isn’t the time for Indian takeaway.

If I was having guests for Christmas dinner and it wasn't going to be a traditional meal, I would say so.

With people we haven't entertained before, I always ask if there's anything they can't or don't like to eat.

My sister was invited to Xmas dinner by friends years ago and it ended up a cold buffet, turkey and ham, but with salad, etc. She was so disappointed, so I think people should be told what's on the menu.

*And my DIL was once hospitalised through sitting next to someone who was eating prawns... Anaphylaxis!
So it's not always a question of bad manners on the part of the guests, but consideration on the part of the host.*

Mother in Law always does a cheeseboard. I love cheese but am allergic to blue cheese which she always buys. She has never had any allergies to anything and blithely goes on about me not liking blue cheese!! Er no!! So far I haven't have have a severe reaction but its hard just to avoid it as everyone dives in with the same knives so the cheese I can eat plus the butter gets contaminated. I always correct MiL but to be honest the other guests don't really care. Luckily DH has long arms, grabs the cheeseboard first and cuts me generous chunks of the ones I can eat!!