Its all OK…….for now. Do we ever stop worrying about our AC?

You never stop worrying no matter how old your Kids get if you love them that is!

StephLP

All this worrying! It doesn't change the situation or outcome at all.

try telling your brain that......

All this worrying! It doesn't change the situation or outcome at all.

My daughter , aged 41, recently apologised for being a disappointment! Nothing could be further from the truth ! She is kind, generous, fun, caring , has a very responsible job , runs her own home but us still hurting after the love of her life left her after 13 years! She says he stole her future as she placed so much Hope and faith on him!
I am just disappointed FOR her never WITH her ! One day somebody will see her for all she is Worthing I NEVER stop worrying about her ! However , she comes from a stock of strong females !

I am taking great comfort from this post. My youngest rings me in the middle of the night (or early hours of the morning) sobbing because he feels so low. He has usually been drinking and, whilst his problems are valid reasons to be depressed, the alcohol just tips him over the edge. As such, I listen and comfort but it is so painful and distressing. He is waiting for an operation to put things right but a genetic abnormality means that he is likely to suffer the same again and it has such an impact on his life. When he sobs that he just wants to be normal, I feel so helpless. My other children tell me I should put a stop to the late night calls but I worry that if he can't turn to me, he will get desperate and do something stupid.

On the plus side, he sometimes rings me just because he is walking home at night on his own. On those occasions he is normally happy and chats away telling me all about what is going on in his life and his friend's lives. His brother tells me that he occasionally rings him as he doesn't feel that he can keep putting on me. Despite all his brother says about me putting a stop to the late night calls, his brother is more than happy to receive them!

Humptydumpty it is difficult; children can feel responsible for their parent's happiness. I can recall that particularly, and evidently children blame themselves for a divorce. How we beat ourselves up throughout life. How simple life would be without emotions!

Rosina absolutely, that was the saying that came to me while I was reading this. I once made the mistake of telling my DD who felt it put a lot of pressure on her and I regretted it.

Sapphire24 hang on in there! This time last time last year we were all devastated at the end of our sons marriage and worried about the effect on our GC. He was at his very lowest and so desperately sad.

A year on, our GC have adjusted and seem to be absolutely fine. Our son has met a lovely girl who seems much better suited to him and life is good again.

Life gets good, then bad, sad then happy and we just need to hang on in there supporting our children when needed. So hope everything improves for you too.

The price of love. I was told 'You can be only as happy as your unhappiest child'. That was a wise comment - how true.

A lot of us don't have any to worry about!

I don’t think we do stop worrying. My oldest 32 now living in Canada for 1.5 yrs, my only worry with him is not seeing him much, his life is good and wholesome, though communication is v good via what’s app and FaceTime. He will be home May for 2.5 wks to catch up with friends & family. We go over to his wedding in August.
Youngest 29 son, lives about 5-8 miles away, works hard In hospitality, lives the life, always busy... has a heart of gold but doesn’t find much time for me. Like yourself alcohol plays a big part of his life & somehow all his socialising revolves around this, as his work, so yes for me a big worry. But nevertheless we will always worry about our AC. Mums can’t seem to let go.?

As an adult child with a surviving parent, I would be upset if I thought my dad was worrying about me. I hope we have an honest relationship, and even at 55, I want him to be proud of me and trust me.

I hope my AC think they can be completely honest with me too, although I suspect that isn’t always the case. I do worry sometimes, but equally, I want them to know I trust them.

I don't think I will ever stop worrying about them. DD was a big worry at uni, always phoning in tears about a broken relationship or not coping with workload. Used to dread the phone ringing and jumped whenever it did. She is now married although they had big problems to start with, again constant phone calls and tears. Happily they are now fine and have 2 children so clearly turned out OK. DS is currently living at home, single and unemployed, made redundant during furlough. He does worry me and I really try hard not to nag too much. I'm hoping it won't be long before he is settled.

it never stops does it. its the grandchildren I worry about mostly though they're grown up now...

I worry but I don't think my husband worries as much as I do

No, never. Your children are always your children, however old they are. And you can't just break the habit of always worrying for them and about them because they are now adults.

At least half of my children have told their children I died. I have no contact any more so nothing to worry about.

Short answer... NO.
Now that my DS has children of his own, I worry about the children now and fear for their future in this crazy society.

It all depends on the luck of the draw. I almost lost one last year. Home after two huge operations and months in hospital and waiting for a third op. Another has a brain tumour. I worry about both of them all the time and the fit ones too because I have seen how lives can turn in a second. If I had all thriving happy offfspring I wouldn’t need to worry.

I have always told my grown up children that when you become a parent, no one supplies an OFF switch. You are permanently on duty 24/7 whatever the ages of your children.
Its the price you pay for the privilege of having them and of course Grandchildren

I can remember when my daughter's marriage broke up in terrible circumstances, and I felt so sad for her I didn't think I would ever feel happy again.
Twenty years on she has happily re-married, had another three children and is at the top of her profession. I still worry though.

I will be sixty in just over a year and my DM says she still worries about me.

I worry about them, their partners and their children far too much, I'm sure.
I've often thought I'd like to be immortal but, the rate our family is growing, I think the worry would kill me, even if natural causes didn't!!

I don't think you ever stop worrying. We have had the usual up and downs as a family until about 5 years ago. Our DD had an horrendous event in her life that affected the whole family and I thought my heart would break. Now she has put her life together and we are now again a family with our usual ups and downs. I still worry about my AC but now I am a real worry guts about my GC. It never stops.

Since our daughter split from her husband three years ago my husband has become extremely anxious. He phones her at least once a day. He is worried about the children. I feel that they are all fine. He is waiting on tenterhooks for the next catastrophe. Its all very wearing.