Strong women

I agree with you all. However, I suppose people are just trying to be nice.
What would be a better comment or thing to say to people with cancer or other serious diseases? Serious question?

I do not like it when people say how well someone has fought cancer, it implies that those that died did not fight hard enough.

GagaJo

When I had cancer, people said 'Oh you're so brave'. WTF? Like I'd chosen the fight.

I agree.

And as for bravery/heroism, words bandied about. In my opinion these words should be applied only where there is a choice, and people do it anyway. A shining example is Zelensky and his wife. Neither my husband nor I chose to have cancer so weren’t brave. Just lucky.

Strong is someone who gets up again and again and that can be man woman or child

I wonder if anyone would admit to being a weak or feeble woman?

Oddly enough, one of my neighbours actually described herself to me as "not one of those independent women types" not long ago. She admitted that she had never learnt to drive because her husband "does all the driving" and she isn't involved in bill paying, savings, insurances or household finances because "Steve sees to all that". She happily confirmed that, "If Steve goes before me, I'll come to you for help; you're good at that sort of thing!"

I like the expression sorry. There are many different types of strong women. The overworked (and certainly underpaid )nurse I encountered in hospital last week who stayed cheerful and kind despite insanely long working hours , a close relative who has endured the loss of a teenage child but carried on her life helping others, a friend who had an abusive marriage and near bankruptcy but battled through taking on many jobs to keep afloat and helped other people along the way.

I wonder if anyone would admit to being a weak or feeble woman? Would those be the ones who have to have a man take charge in any situation? The ones referred to as 'the little woman'?
I know some women who always prefer a male doctor, solicitor or accountant. A woman of my acquaintance once said to me, 'Its alright for you, you've got opinions and everything.' I didn't know quite how to take that!
My suspicion is that it's females like that that give us all a bad name!

I would much rather be a difficult woman.

And me! Because strength is gained from surviving difficulty, learning from it and moving on.

I think it is about resilience and ability to cope, also allowing yourself to set firm boundaries and asserting yourself to ensure that they are respected. I’m not saying that I’m always successful, by the way, just that’s what I aspire to ?

I would much rather be a difficult woman.

I interpret being strong to being positive

Someone who doesn’t dissolve into tears or take to her bed when faced with life’s challenges, but gets on with things regardless of how she feels inside, for the sake of others. That’s probably most of us.

I don't think it is necessarily about the things we go through...

You can be strong and go through a little or strong and go through a lot... What we go through is not a measure of strength

I think the strength is how we handle it.

When we go through things, are we still kind to others or do we take our problems out on them?

Do we allow ourselves time and rest or tears when we need it? Self care is also strength.

Do we make time for others problems when facing our own? That is also strength.

Do we love and hug and smile at our families when we are exhausted or stressed or anxious? That is also strength.

That's how I see it anyway

I was called weak by a colleague once because I have no confidence or drive to 'get on'. This person had no idea of what my life's been like.

I loathe the expression and would never use it.If a woman isn't "strong" does that mean she's "weak"? It's just another of those trite expressions used by lazy people and tbh I have no idea what it means.

Perhaps strong is going through so much c**p that you don't want to get up in the morning but still manage to do so.

That's what I think too paddyann54 I'm often the one listening to the concerns of others, helping to sort things out and generally being supportive.

GagaJo

When I had cancer, people said 'Oh you're so brave'. WTF? Like I'd chosen the fight.

My thoughts exactly - people would tell me to "keep fighting" - what alternative did I have!

A strong woman is:

Courageous
She knows who she is
She builds others up
She doesn't see showing emotion as a weakness
She follows and trusts her intuition
She knows what it takes to give her happiness
She owns her successes and believes in herself
She doesn't let the opinions of others influence her
She doesn't feel bad about breaking societal rules or reinventing herself
She knows that she can survive in life going it alone
She is a work in progress on growing stronger

I think its the ability to hold everything together under pressure.I've always been the go to person when anyone has a problem and the one who stays in control when the world is falling apart around us .I get things done .
Months down the line I 'll probably have my own meltdown ,but in private because I 'd rather not burden others .
I THINK its a woman thing ,something mothers in particular have always done .The women in my family certainly have .

Likewise when my DD had twins she was told she was brave. As if she had any choice !

Exactly Gagajo. My husband is in remission from cancer. During his treatment people said he was brave. He had no choice.

When I had cancer, people said 'Oh you're so brave'. WTF? Like I'd chosen the fight.

For me I think it's emotional resilience and the ability to 'bounce back'.