The life you could have had

I have made good and bad decisions, probably in equal measure! I tend not to dwell on either and live in the here and now. One decision has, however, always interested me as to what my life might have been. I passed civil service exams etc when I was 17 and was invited to work in London in the DSS. I took cold feet and turned it down and went to university instead. I don't regret that decision but I've occasionally wondered what my life could have been.

That is so important for me to look back and be content with the past . Life is still good and everyone makes mistakes that is human

I think for most women our lives are often led by what our husbands did.

Apart from DH, there were two men in my life that I probably would have married had one or two things happened differently. Both have died in the last 10 years.

One moved to Australia in his 30s, and I am glad things resulted the way they did. I had a very peripatetic childhood and I do not think I would have been happy so far from my immediate family. The other was a doctor and joined a practice in a remote rural part of Britain where work and career opportunities for me would have been limited.

As it is, the marriage I actually made, as well as making me happy, enabled me to live somewhere where there were suitable job opportunities, and if not close to family, at least I had them within a couple of hours drive

Of course I have made poor decisions in life and had my fair share of tragedies and unhappiness, no ones life is perfect. But overall, when I look at the alternative lifes I could have had, I am glad I have had the one I have.

My regret is breaking my heart over people that were not worth it. Over worrying and taking responsibility for their inadequacies, wasted a lot of time on them. I’m older and wiser, did my best at the time, you can’t do more. I know I wouldn’t be anywhere in the world but here in the uk and I’ve done a lot of travelling, I’ve had a good life and I’m thankful, but I’ve things yet to do.

As we get older, we can all look back and wish we had chosen different paths and done different things.

I wish I had worked harder at school. I wish I had thought more about what job I did when I left. Should I have branched out and worked away, instead of remaining in my little home town, marrying young to a lovely lad with no ambitions either, having our family and just getting on with our uneventful life?

But we are still together after nearly 50 years, pretty content, comfortable, two adult children, married with five grandchildren.

Who knows what would have been if I had trodden a different path?

Ive come to the decision that it’s no good looking back and thinking I wish I had done that this or the other . The past has gone . It’s the future that’s now important for me as I’m realising that time is flying and I’ve got hundreds of „ to do lists“ I hope to be able to do in the next few years

My thinking is similar to karmalady. At various 'forks in the road' I made choices I am very happy with now.

I am a glass half full type of person and I wonder if that makes a difference. Or I am not very self reflective.

I am content and glad to be so, it is a nice state to be in, no regrets about my life and especially none about my choice of husband. I look back and can see all those choices from a young age, it was my fate to take the paths I did

Me too. If only we could turn back the clock with the knowledge we now have.

Yup, same here

I wonder about this all the time and know what bad decisions I made...drives me potty.

- turned my back on.