Prince Louie going through THAT stage

volver

^Getting riled doesn’t improve anyone’s situation.^

We didn't get riled. We left.

So why so riled now?
"gang, loud, selfish, screaming, annoying, ineffectual, noisy, intrusive, amok etc"

GrannyGravy13

volver

Well they're all adults now. But anyway.

In the situation I am describing, 10 or so children who were not obviously related (but could have been, admittedly) were making the venue unbearable for anybody but themselves. It wasn't a large venue. These were not people who wanted to be treated the same as anyone else, by wanting to use a footpath in a wheelchair for instance. So to make that comparison is unfair.

These were children running amok and ruining everyone else's day. Literally. It was impossible to see the attractions properly because of the large groups of screaming children.

Think I said this before, yesterday. With rights come responsibilities.

Did you complain to the management at the time?

Were there staff on hand who did nothing?

No, because we do actually realise that people are supposed to suck it up.

Yes.

Joseanne

I've just got back from a few hours in school and managed to grab a quick chat with a highly qualified, expereinced and wise member of staff who holds an SPLD diploma.
She has watched the footage several times over, and while we all agree that he was a very naughty little boy, her take on the incident was interesting. She suggested it could be a case of over disciplining and too much disapproval directed at the boy. Apparently if you watch all the video, at some time before Charlotte was laying into her brother about sucking his thumb, (actually copying and making fun of him), Mike was giving the evil glare, William leaned across with a frown to his wife, and Kate was doing her best to correct Louis in a reasoned manner. It could be likened to a pile on, and the little lad felt he was being told off from all angles. Often there is sadly no escape from this but to live up to the bad name others are giving, especially when you are cornered and can't articulate your feelings in a difficult situation

Moreover she notice that the little boy started slapping himself, so he obviously acknowledged his own misdemeanours afterwards.

As I said before, I think people should cut Louis and his mother some slack, or try to understand the predicament.

Oh dear the "scapegoat" child. Poor Louis. I do wonder why hasn't he got something to occupy himself with when it got too boring. When my GCs were that age and they had to sit anywhere for long periods we always had a bag of books etc to keep them busy.

volver

Well they're all adults now. But anyway.

In the situation I am describing, 10 or so children who were not obviously related (but could have been, admittedly) were making the venue unbearable for anybody but themselves. It wasn't a large venue. These were not people who wanted to be treated the same as anyone else, by wanting to use a footpath in a wheelchair for instance. So to make that comparison is unfair.

These were children running amok and ruining everyone else's day. Literally. It was impossible to see the attractions properly because of the large groups of screaming children.

Think I said this before, yesterday. With rights come responsibilities.

Did you complain to the management at the time?

Were there staff on hand who did nothing?

It was a lot for a boy his age to sit through.I loved seeing him with Charles,though I was wondering what Princess Anne was saying,I couldn't tell whether she was amused or not.

Getting riled doesn’t improve anyone’s situation.

We didn't get riled. We left.

Well they're all adults now. But anyway.

In the situation I am describing, 10 or so children who were not obviously related (but could have been, admittedly) were making the venue unbearable for anybody but themselves. It wasn't a large venue. These were not people who wanted to be treated the same as anyone else, by wanting to use a footpath in a wheelchair for instance. So to make that comparison is unfair.

These were children running amok and ruining everyone else's day. Literally. It was impossible to see the attractions properly because of the large groups of screaming children.

Think I said this before, yesterday. With rights come responsibilities.

volver I am in agreement with SueDonim’s post of 14.40

There is nothing else to add.

If we are out in public we do have to suck up other people’s behaviour, assuming it’s not criminal, in which case you can contact the police.

We can’t control other people’s behaviour but we can control our own reactions. Getting riled doesn’t improve anyone’s situation. If we’ve been out somewhere where there’s a to-do going on, we’ve hung back until whatever it is has moved further on and then resumed our visit.

volver if you know neurodivergent children I am totally amazed at you lack of empathy.

Oops sorry posted too soon, and they take just the same amount of time/energy as a tut or filthy indignant look.

Did you ask if you could help in anyway or interact with them?

Good lord no. And risk being called a do-gooder?

Sorry. I'm not buying it. Just call me the child-catcher, if you like.

(BTW - at least three of my friends have neurodivergent children. I'm not a complete ingenue)

SueDonim

volver

This is an interesting discussion.

How far should we go? Should I be expected to forego the interesting trip that I had been looking forward to for a couple of weeks and paid good money for, because a group of children want to scream and run around in a noisy and intrusive way? And the adult with them is unable to do anything about it? Do you think all of 10 or so of them were neurodivergent?

Possibly. Neurodivergence can have a genetic component so who knows, they may have been siblings. Maybe the adult was at the end of their tether with the children they were caring for, having been up all night with them.

Did you ask if you could help in anyway or interact with them? I’ve done that when I’ve seen a difficult situation playing out. Mostly there is nothing to be done but sometimes just minding a shopping bag or watching a child is enough.

A smile or an acknowledgment can make all the difference to a struggling parent/carer

I guess it depends on one's tolerance levels, one's empathy with other people, and one's ability not to get riled by things about which one has no indepth knowledge.

volver

This is an interesting discussion.

How far should we go? Should I be expected to forego the interesting trip that I had been looking forward to for a couple of weeks and paid good money for, because a group of children want to scream and run around in a noisy and intrusive way? And the adult with them is unable to do anything about it? Do you think all of 10 or so of them were neurodivergent?

Possibly. Neurodivergence can have a genetic component so who knows, they may have been siblings. Maybe the adult was at the end of their tether with the children they were caring for, having been up all night with them.

Did you ask if you could help in anyway or interact with them? I’ve done that when I’ve seen a difficult situation playing out. Mostly there is nothing to be done but sometimes just minding a shopping bag or watching a child is enough.

SueDonim

Joseanne

What ever happened to inclusivity?

It makes you want to weep, doesn’t it?

A FB group I’m on recently wanted to improve local country paths so people in wheelchairs & with prams could use them. There was a huge protest against it where the disabled people were told they should go elsewhere and shouldn’t expect to be able to access things non-disabled people have - in their own area!

It is so very sad that attitudes appear to be going backwards not forwards.

GrannyGravy13

volver

This is an interesting discussion.

How far should we go? Should I be expected to forego the interesting trip that I had been looking forward to for a couple of weeks and paid good money for, because a group of children want to scream and run around in a noisy and intrusive way? And the adult with them is unable to do anything about it? Do you think all of 10 or so of them were neurodivergent?

You do not know that they were not.

Neurodiverse folks of all ages do go on trips they are not shut away in the 21st century, thank goodness…

Neurodivergent or not, they ruined our trip.

Is it the general belief that I should just suck it up?

Serious question.

Joseanne

What ever happened to inclusivity?

It makes you want to weep, doesn’t it?

A FB group I’m on recently wanted to improve local country paths so people in wheelchairs & with prams could use them. There was a huge protest against it where the disabled people were told they should go elsewhere and shouldn’t expect to be able to access things non-disabled people have - in their own area!

volver

This is an interesting discussion.

How far should we go? Should I be expected to forego the interesting trip that I had been looking forward to for a couple of weeks and paid good money for, because a group of children want to scream and run around in a noisy and intrusive way? And the adult with them is unable to do anything about it? Do you think all of 10 or so of them were neurodivergent?

You do not know that they were not.

Neurodiverse folks of all ages do go on trips they are not shut away in the 21st century, thank goodness…

JoseanneI think he looks overwhelmed and just wanted to be left alone. Knowing when to back off with a child is as important as knowing when to intervene.

Exactly that SueDonim. No point adding to the conflict with smacks and yanking him off.

This is an interesting discussion.

How far should we go? Should I be expected to forego the interesting trip that I had been looking forward to for a couple of weeks and paid good money for, because a group of children want to scream and run around in a noisy and intrusive way? And the adult with them is unable to do anything about it? Do you think all of 10 or so of them were neurodivergent?

TBH, I thought it was far too long for him to be expected to behave for.

Joseanne I think he looks overwhelmed and just wanted to be left alone. Knowing when to back off with a child is as important as knowing when to intervene.

I agree about the professional tutters. I expect there were a few when my 3yo GD had a sit-down strike in a cafe when she wasn’t allowed a free lolly because she hadn’t eaten her lunch. She sat on the floor while I sat on a nearby chair for about ten minutes. She actually looked v like Louis, not shouting but that crossed arms defensive mode with a grumpy face.

Some tutter/do-gooder suggested I give her a lolly. Er, no. After about 10 mins GD stood up, said she was ready to eat her lunch, which she proceeded to do, and that was the end of it.

What ever happened to inclusivity?

Ah don’t worry volver a solution would be to check before you go anywhere that there are not any neurodivergent folks attending.

We were there first. Maybe they should have checked.