School sports days - agree or disagree

childlike innocence!

My 7 year old DGS who won his races was furious his mummy came only 2nd. ?

My grandaughter (7) recently told me proudly that she had come in fourth in all her races. I congratulated her and smiled at how pleased she was. Her mother later told me there were only four participants in each of grandaughter’s events!

I thought sports days in this day and age were much more less traumatic than when I went to school.
It was hell for me too, absolutely hated “performing “ in front of the whole school (they probably wouldn’t have looked twice but it doesn’t feel like that at the time!). If a child is really suffering from anxiety then stay home.

Sports at school contrived to make me LOATHE competitive sport. I will never take part because I find it embarrassing and humiliating. Yoga and long walks for me and I never forced my kids to “join in” unless they wanted to.

Joseanne

^the presence of an ice cream van^ and strawberries, scones and tea for the grown ups!

I don't know about an icecream van but the PTA stalwarts are always there with the strawberries and icecreams

growstuff

How many posters on here have ever been to a secondary school sports day? From reading the post, it seems that nearly all (if not all) are about primary school.

I've been a participant in both and the Grammar school one was worse than the Junior/Infant. School houses competing against each other all had to participate in the first three years.
We learned how to play the system later and I still got letters written for me, I had a very supportive father and mother.

Why is it considered humiliation to come last? Someone has to, and if the over sensitive stay at home, someone else will be coming last. It might be a spur to try harder, practice, or perhaps just accept you aren't the best runner in the class and laugh at yourself. The school I worked at had a field where children did a sponsored walk, or run, depending upon preference, for a local chairity. This took place on Friday afternoon; on Monday morning one angry father rang to say his son wouldn't be coming in as he was still 'exhausted' from 'being made to run round the field on Friday'. I suggested he take him to see the GP as he must have a health problem - although the problem was his father I fear.

the presence of an ice cream van and strawberries, scones and tea for the grown ups!

I think people might well be overthinking it. Yes there are sensitive types who might be embarrassed and yes there are competitive sporty types who like to win but the majority are in the middle and don't care either way . They're having a different sort of day out of school. The presence of Mum and Dad might not be as important as the presence of an ice cream van. Bottom line - many children aren't bothered either way.

I think the assumption made that it was primary school was because the parent was "keeping the child home". (Most teenagers make their own minds up!)
The humiliating bit still worries me, (yes, overthinking it, I know!). It can't be the child's peers, because surely they already know who is good at sports and who is likely to win. It most certainly wouldn't be the teachers. So are we to assume it's the other parents who are making a child feel humiliated, or is it the child themself who has an issue,?

My daughter in law is a teacher and she let my grandson stay home on sports day. He hates it and she doesn't think he should be forced into it.

If not all students are participating it won't be humiliating.
It's the compulsory participation that the girl presumably found upsetting and humiliating. I'm pretty sure if she had been accommodated in some way she wouldn't have this reaction.

We have no need for this bullying nonsense in my opinion.

Lots of people have suggested that schools can find alternatives. I think this school should take note.

I have been to many secondary/senior school sports days (private and state). Football tournaments, gymnastics days, cricket, etc.

They are more competitive in my experience and not all pupils participate.

Totally agree with you Vintagejazz… i think they should have team games…. i was always nervous and anxious on sorts days 56 years ago …. my youngest son always hated sports days … i kept him home on sports days the last two years at senior school.. not everyone is good at sport and it can be very humiliating!

growstuff

How many posters on here have ever been to a secondary school sports day? From reading the post, it seems that nearly all (if not all) are about primary school.

Do they have sports days at secondary schools now?

So many saying it is humiliation? What about those non-academics who live only for sports lessons and sports day? It ought to be voluntary to attend, take part or sit and read under a tree...not vilified

All the school pupils should attend sports day and those who are willing to participate in competitions and races should be allowed to do so, others can do lots of supporting tasks such as helping get ready for races, give out programmes etc. Keeping a child away from sports day sets them up for all sorts of problems the main one missing out on the fun and then hearing about from their school friends who can share events and exclude the child who wasn't there.

I liked school, and it didn't bother me that I came in last or among the last at sports' day, as my parents and teachers took the view that an academically bright child could not be expected to excel at sports, and coming in last for once would do her no harm.

The only thing I disliked about sports' day was the fact that it was usually blustry and cold - any day where the rain is not lashing down in the summer term being call a fair day in Scotland.

As a teacher, I was heartily thankful that sports' day only came round once a year, as I always found myself landed with time-keeping at some kind of sport I knew nothing about.

It's a set menu not 'a la carte'. A good time for a lesson in enjoying doing something for it's own sake - or buckle up and get through it's only - what? - 2 hours?

That's life, I think.
I certainly wouldn't withdraw a child in case they didn't shine as the egg and spoon champion.

I can still remember my friend and I (both not aporty) winning the 3 legged race.
We had practiced during playtime, and it paid off.

Surely the school (and of course parents) should be bringing up their children to NOT make fun of those who are less able in a particular skill.

To want to withdraw your child because of them feeling humiliated seems to be doing things the wrong way round. We should be ensuring that coming 4th, 5th or last doesn't matter - you did your best. For some children just finishing a 300 yard race is a great achievement.

I'm a reasonably healthy 75 year old who managed to avoid school sports, gym and swimming all my secondary school career so I doubt they are essential. At primary school I always came last for reasons I never understood until spirometry at age 50 showed I had diminished lung capacity. I saw no reason to be a loser when I moved up to secondary.

Thanks Yammy good post.

No, I’ve never been to a secondary school sports day. I distinctly remember telling DD1 that I would see her that afternoon at her first one, and getting told very firmly that parents weren’t invited. And she was right, they weren’t.

Growstuff I’ve experienced both.
I can’t say that I have found them much different.
The secondary ones involve more indecipherable bellowing through loud hailers; forbidden crop tops and sharing of lip balm; and plenty of avoidant wandering about the school site (both students and staff)