"Well at least they're not at home playing on their x box"

There will be younger children trying to sleep, people who have to be up at 6pm to commute to work starting to go to bed, and even people who have been listening to children playing outside all day wanting an hour or so to relax with a book or the telly in peace for an hour or so before bed. Give and take is important when you have close neighbours.

Who said children should be sitting indoors all day?

What is wrong with children playing outside until 9.30 in the evening in the only month of the year where it is light enough to do so? They are on holiday from school now, surely? Except of course in England, which has different school terms to everyone else.

Do you really go to bed that early?

You may have been stopped from running around shrieking when you were a child, but at that time we just went off and played round the corner or in the fields were no-one bothered about us making a din. Modern over-protected children aren't allowed out of their parents sight, so put up with the din, or encourage their over-cautious parents to continue to bring up children who sit around indoors all the time.

I think those who implying that objections to late night shouting and screaming by children somehow equates to not enjoying seeing children play outside are unfair.

One again, there's a happy medium. You can thoroughly enjoy the sight of kids running around, turning cartwheels on the green, playing some of the games you remember from your own childhood AND still want a bit of peace and quiet directly outside your house from about 9pm or find the one or two children who scream and screech constantly very annoying.

It doesn't have to be either or.

I was told to come back before dark too. We had friends on the estate so it was safety in numbers but I remember getting told off by certain households too. This has happened forever hasn't it? and certainly isn't anything new?

I live in a street of terraced houses and while I have no objection whatsoever to children playing...the last year or so it's been quite bad and it does seem to be getting worse.
Footballs continually thumped against walls and cars - several vehicles actually damaged (the boys playing are 8 -12 years old), screaming and shouting until 10.00 pm most evenings and it normally starts around 4.00 pm, several mums will sit on the doorstep while the children are running around or on bikes / scooters etc and totally ignore the little ones.
Yesterday 2 nearly got hit by cars!
I never hear 'play quietly or watch what you are doing with the ball'
What's even more frustrating is I live very close to a lot of open spaces / parks.

I was an infant teacher for many years and on school trips always reminded the children before we left that other visitors to the zoo/museum wherever were there to see the attraction, not to listen to kids shouting. I was pleasantly surprised that this usually worked and they generally controlled their volume. I think it needs pointing out by the responsible adult. Problem is many adults now abdicate the responsibility.

I don't think she knows the parents at all. She had a rather unpleasant incident a few weeks ago where she asked a group of kids, 3 times, to stop swinging out of a fragile tree directly outside her house and screaming and shouting at 10 to 10.30pm and to go and play on the green, a few yards away, instead. The third time she went out and told them off.
One girl reported to her parents that she had told them they couldn't play on the green. The father started having a go and saying his children had a perfect right to play on the green. My friend explained exactly what she'd said. The father harrumph a bit then said well anyway they were playing a game where they needed to swing out of a tree etc etc

No apology for the late night noise or anything. She feels uncomfortable saying anything after that.

I do understand its the screaming that's the problem. My son's children are screamers, because they've never been told to keep the noise down. My other grandchildren do make a noise and they do scream, but they don't indulge in the mindless running round and round screeching at the tops of their voices.

But when they're not your own children there's nothing you can do. How well do you know the parents?

I think the park is different. That's what parks are for - not swearing and being a nuisance, but to let rip and be raucous.

Playing outside of someone's window, as in the OP, is not the same at all.

I grew up in a city, where parks and so on were the only wide open spaces, but I know what you mean about children not roaming. Mine didn't go far either, and we live in a small town. We were lucky that there was a nearby playing field, but that has houses on now.

Children have to let off steam somewhere. Which is why I don't really care about raucous teenagers at the park. Let rip! And if my DGS and a lot of littles hadn't been there, I wouldn't have cared about the blue language either.

We have to remember that the wide open spaces that were available when we were children have often gone, been built on. Neither are children allowed to roam at will, as I did. My DD wasn't as a child, and my DGS won't be allowed to either.

Yes this was how it was where I grew up - little back to back terraces without gardens. So the kids were playing just under your window.
No, we had gardens and there was plenty of space inside for Mrs NDN to get away from the noise . I think she'd just forgotten what it was like to have children, as her own had grown and I don't remember there being grandchildren there.

There is a danger of that, and of just misremembering what it was like when our own were small, but I still think that consideration works both ways, and that parents should teach children that they need to think of other people.

I'm sure we made plenty of noise outside as children. However, at aged 9 or 10 we were at home by 9.30. It was generally understood that however accommodating or patient neighbours were during the day and early evening, there came a time when it was only fair and considerate to call children in.

i live in a small block of flats that was all elderly/middle aged when i moved in, now it is mostly families, there is nowhere for the children to play other than the front of the building, they do scream and make a noise and most of the time i can either zone out or shut my balcony door, it is something you have to accept or you can move, with housing so short most 1 & 2 bedroom houses will have children, the only way to avoid this is to move to a more sheltered area that has one bedroom houses or as my dad does....wear earphones to watch tv or listen to music.

Vintagejazz....I'm sure your friend screamed when she was a child and excited to be playing and running bout with her friends... We all did its a part of growing up...I love to hear the kids out with their pals enjoying themselves...Let them be children for as long as possible and enjoy their free time....

When I was a child we lived on a street where the houses faced each other across a pavement, which was ideal for children playing

Yes this was how it was where I grew up - little back to back terraces without gardens. So the kids were playing just under your window. Having said that most of us kept the front room for "best" when you had visitors in. It was called the front room or parlour. So the noise in the middle room was not so bad. Kids also played a lot in the yard, which would have a wall around it. Obviously safer than playing in the street. Im sure we were a noisy lot. Seldom less than eight or ten of us.

I really don't remember screaming at all. That's not to say it didn't happen, as it's not something you would necessarily remember, but I don't.

I think that children shouting is to be expected (although again, 'children' covers a wide range of ages). Even if they 'know better' they will forget. But screaming is different, unless they have special needs of some sort.

When I was a child we lived on a street where the houses faced each other across a pavement, which was ideal for children playing. Less ideal for our NDN, who was old (I think - I remember her as being ancient, but you know how perspective changes as we age ourselves). She was always telling us to play outside our own house, which we were doing, of course. Between her complaints and my mother insisting we stayed where she could see us from the sitting room window, it's a miracle we managed to play at all?.

I remember walking home from school in the middle of the road (you'd get mown down by cars now) and screaming at the top of our lungs. Can't remember why. But it's a clear memory. I could look up the street name and tell you where it was, the memory is so vivid.

My grandad (who was a pillar of the community) used to relate stories to me of him being a young tearaway/rebel. Fathers were not happy when he was seen out with their daughters.

So none of this is new. Children are children in any time or place. My Chinese students who many would have judged as clones/indoctrinated by those who may now be absent from the site, were in actual fact no different to British kids. Lovely but loud and boisterous.

When we were kids (1950s) we all played in the street every evening after school and week ends too. They were little flat fronted terraces without gardens so it must have been very noisy for the neighbours to have kids a few feet away. I cant recall anyone complaining then except when we were playing with balls against the side of their house. In those days if an adult told you not to do something you obeyed - and found somewhere else to have your ball game.

I really notice the screaming. I'm sure it didn't used to be like this.

My library is always full of mother and baby singalongs, people using the computers whilst speaking on phones, meetings, chattering people looking at exhibitions and this week a woman talking at the top of her voice to a cat who happened to be wandering through. It's busier and noisier than the street outside. Good to see people (and cats) using it though.

lemsip

I was annoyed by kids screeching and screaming in the public library ....wearing cycle helmets with bikes ouside an helmeted mother hovering and thinking it alright to let the 5 and 8 yr olds.. at a guess, run round and round the book shelves ..... The park is opposite!

I used to work in our small local library. Most of the children were well behaved but we did get some who’d noisily charge around, crashing into adults quietly trying to choose books.

We were not allowed to say anything - for fear of putting people off. I did once remonstrate - mildly enough - with a child who was banging a plastic toy - hard! - on one of our computer keyboards, while the mother of course said nothing.

The mother later complained and of course I was the one who was reprimanded. Being ‘child friendly’ evidently included allowing children to damage expensive equipment.

I once heard a mother saying to her noisily charging about children, ‘Don’t do that or ‘the lady’ (me or colleague) will be cross.’

NB, not, ‘Don’t do that because we don’t run about shouting in the library.’
Glad to say there was only a minority of such parents, though.,

I shouted at teenagers in the park this week. They were swearing and acting like idiots. Normally, I love teenagers. I love their sneery daftness and find them hilarious. But the park had a lot of small children in it (including my DGS) and the teenagers were doing that loud 'look at me, I'm such a rebel' swearing and posturing.

I was lucky they didn't retaliate, other than a girl sarcastically making a comment about being told off. They slowly moved away from me (crazy old lady) and eventually left.

Have fun by all means. Scream and shout (they're children, it's what they do). Let off steam. But I draw the line at vandalism or overt and deliberate swearing.

Yes, it does come down to whether they are brought up to think they are the centre of the world, or if they are taught to think of other people.

I hope someone had a word with the mother?

I was annoyed by kids screeching and screaming in the public library ....wearing cycle helmets with bikes ouside an helmeted mother hovering and thinking it alright to let the 5 and 8 yr olds.. at a guess, run round and round the book shelves ..... The park is opposite!

Of course there's a middle ground. I suppose it depends on the age of the children, but if they are of screaming age, which is usually very young, someone in the group's parents should be able to see them, or they should be in earshot. Mine played in the garden, and obviously weren't silent; but I did not allow screaming. I would warn them if it happened, then they had one more chance, and if they did it again they were brought indoors. Children are not going to play quietly, but if they are brought up from the start to recognise that there are other people to be considered, they can learn to keep the noise down to sensible levels, and by 8-11 they should definitely be able to do so without adults telling them.

I don't think it's being miserable to want a bit of peace in your own home, and whereas I also enjoy hearing children's laughter, screaming is really annoying. Also, in any residential area there will be people with different things going on in their lives. Shift workers, people with babies, people who are sick, insomniacs - all of these people have a right to use their homes as they need to, too.

As an aside, I don't understand why some people demonise screens so much. Yes, children need exercise, but there is little difference between playing on an iPad and reading a book as far as that is concerned. A lot of gaming is interactive, and can teach interpersonal skills, as well as being educational in many cases.

There are three very noisy children nearby who delight in screaming whilst playing, but I made a similar comment about them that it is good to hear children playing. Despite being a teacher I don't know why children have to scream so much; coming upon a school playground unexpectedly it sounded as though murder was taking place; but it is a fact of life, and the nights are already drawing in.
The only thing I wish is that parents would occasionally reprove their children for the noise they are making, but many are as noisy themselves, witness behaviour and loud music at evening BBQs.