Gender Reveal Parties What the Hell???

JaneJudge

CraftyGranny

When I was expecting our first baby, my Mum bought the pram but wouldn't pick it up until baby was born. She said it was bad luck.
Has anybody else experienced this?

yup

Me too and it and the cot were delivered late so drawer was used for baby to sleep in. It was the shop that did not want to deliver it before the birth. Apparently, it was the store's policy

Plastic tatt is everywhere.

Lots of sustainable ways to do everything

So probably better to fight the tatt rather than what others celebrate

CraftyGranny

When I was expecting our first baby, my Mum bought the pram but wouldn't pick it up until baby was born. She said it was bad luck.
Has anybody else experienced this?

Yes. My Mum and my Mum-in-la both refused to pick up the big items (cot and pram) till I was back home. The 2nd had carry cot was already there but evidently didn’t count.
I agree about plastic tat, but if people want to celebrate things that sound strange to me, why not let them do it.

I don't think anyone has said that announcements or parties shouldn't happen - just that in some cases they are not something an individual poster would do herself.

All the 'live and let live' only extends so far, doesn't it?

It just seems to me that it should be a private moment.
I would absolutely hate the thought of everyone knowing before I’d had time to take it all in.
Each to his own, but I’m not keen on the idea.

VioletSky

I think we need to let people have their happiness.

Let them have their gender reveal parties, their Christmas decorations in October, their hobbies we don't understand.

Let people find all the happiness and joy they can in life

This^
Whatever floats your boat i say.....I didn't find out my 3 childrens sex until birth ( not even sure it was possible in the 90s??)...... my DD and youngest DS both found out the sex of their babies by private scan at 16 weeks....3 of my DNs have had gender reveal parties at 16 weeks.....all different...all personal choice....no right...no wrong ....I first went to a gender reveal party a few years ago....so they've been around in UK a good while

JaneJudge

CraftyGranny

When I was expecting our first baby, my Mum bought the pram but wouldn't pick it up until baby was born. She said it was bad luck.
Has anybody else experienced this?

yup

I didn’t buy anything for Gdc1 until I heard that she’d arrived safely. I then zoomed down to John Lewis to find something!
Ditto for 2 and 3. I never like buying for babies until they’re here. I know it’s daft but it feels like tempting Fate.

You put a deposit on a pram in a pram shop remember those? .
Nowadays young parents have more confidence than some of us did. They assume their baby will be born alive and well.
I never counted my chickens.
With my 4th I had an amniocentesis as I was quite old and with 3 boys already I preferred not to know the sex in advance incase I was a tiny bit disappointed. I knew when I met him or her there would be only joy.
There was and utter surprise as the midwife said "it's a girl, but we all knew that, it was written in your notes!"

I live in the states and I, too, think this is ridiculous. However, this is a new generation, no doubt, and they will call their own parties for reasons that baffle the elders. At least they are having harmless fun.

LilyoftheValley

Dreadful American idea - along with baby showers. Will we be having any Trying for a baby tonight! Showers I wonder?

I am laughing at this, 'Trying for a baby tonight party' it will most likely mean one big orgy.

I remember the superstition about the pram.When we bought a pram for our first baby the shop kept it in their warehouse until baby and I were safely home from hospital.I used the same pram for our second baby, it was kept in the house!

I’m still miffed I never had an engagement party, my parents were not impressed with my choice of fiancé. 2 weeks tomorrow we will have been married 51 years !

I dislike the idea of gender reveal parties, and would try my best not to go to one, but each to his own.

I don't mind either way if people choose to know the sex of their child in advance. I have been to a baby shower where the sex was revealed (my grandson), and to see the tears in my son's eyes as it made it even more real to him was a joy. I think my DIL already knew. I also love the fact that baby showers are now not just ladies getting together, but couples.

A reason to celebrate in anticipation of a new family arrival isn't a bad thing, in my eyes. I'm not one for over-the-top parties, but each to his own.

VioletSky

Plastic tatt is everywhere.

Lots of sustainable ways to do everything

So probably better to fight the tatt rather than what others celebrate

In theory, you are right.

The reality is that more money is made by selling this tatt.

So the industry will find ever more events to 'celebrate'.

And we can continue to dump the plastic on Turkey, Malaysia and Poland.

Some of the plastic ending up in southern Turkey is burned releasing large amounts of carcinogenic chemicals that pollute the soil and food sources for animals.

There is a lack of legal regulation and in Turkey the amount of imported waste is becoming impossible to handle.

At some point, you do have to question the ethics, and the gullibility and culpability of those who are drawn into this ever-expanding culture.

People should, at least, be aware.

I think there are a few issues going on here.

There is no need to bring plastic tat to a 'reveal' party. If people want to bring presents they could just as easily be sustainable ones.

I do think that they drag out the celebrations though. Just as people getting married now will often encompass an engagement party, expensive stag and hen trips abroad and then a huge wedding, having a baby is taking on the same sort of thing, with a 'reveal' and a shower before the baby's even born. All well and good if you can afford it, but extra pressure for those who can't, and it all seems a bit 'me me me'. (for me, at least ).

Then there's the whole 'gender' thing. It's the sex of the baby that is being revealed - why are people calling it a 'gender reveal? Whether you go in for the so-called 'gender' thing or not, can an unborn child really have a gender?

But, the bottom line is that it's up to the parents. I understand the excitement, and that the grandparents to be will be excited too. A family 'reveal' is a different thing from a big party, IMO.

Doodledog

If so-called 'gender' is all about feelings and what you 'know inside', shouldn't these be sex-reveal parties?

Either way, it's not my bag either, but yes, each to her own.

That’s just what I was thinking. Though maybe sex reveal parties could give the wrong message…

Doodledog

I think there are a few issues going on here.

There is no need to bring plastic tat to a 'reveal' party. If people want to bring presents they could just as easily be sustainable ones.

I do think that they drag out the celebrations though. Just as people getting married now will often encompass an engagement party, expensive stag and hen trips abroad and then a huge wedding, having a baby is taking on the same sort of thing, with a 'reveal' and a shower before the baby's even born. All well and good if you can afford it, but extra pressure for those who can't, and it all seems a bit 'me me me'. (for me, at least ).

Then there's the whole 'gender' thing. It's the sex of the baby that is being revealed - why are people calling it a 'gender reveal? Whether you go in for the so-called 'gender' thing or not, can an unborn child really have a gender?

But, the bottom line is that it's up to the parents. I understand the excitement, and that the grandparents to be will be excited too. A family 'reveal' is a different thing from a big party, IMO.

There is no need to bring plastic tat to a 'reveal' party. If people want to bring presents they could just as easily be sustainable ones.

It isn't just about the 'reveal' parties or baby showers.

Stag and Hen do's, Halloween, Christmas... all have costumes and accessories, some sold by the largest retailers, containing plastic; disposable cups, glasses, plates, etc. The list of 'must-haves' is endless. All these events are being exploited for commercial gain.

Fortunately, there's a growing number of people who are reverting to the more traditional way of celebrating these events - starting by making their own costumes, and even assembling their own Christmas decorations (and I don't mean paper-chains from the 40s and 50s).

A family 'reveal' is a different thing from a big party, IMO.

It is. Very much so.

Baby showers and gender reveal parties just seem a bit "Kardashian" and grabby to me

I love your replies. Some of you are right about the plastic Halloween tat in the shops, To add to my original post in another local group a girl was looking for Halloween events locally for her 7 month old baby as she didn't want them to miss out. How the hell would a baby even know where it was let alone about Halloween. Am I living on another planet or are babies now being born with the knowledge about birthdays, Halloween, Christmas etc.

Maryl

Some events are for parents to enjoy their firsts with their child - xmas, halloween, bday, etc

Hithere

Maryl

Some events are for parents to enjoy their firsts with their child - xmas, halloween, bday, etc

They are. I remember my son's first birthday. I was so excited that I bought balloons with his name and a giant 1 on them, and took them to the playgroup he went to, with cake. The more experienced parents looked askance, but he was my first, so I thought they were being miserable and pressed on cheerfully.

Within minutes it was like the Somme . Balloons bursting, babies crying, toddlers screaming, mums frantically gathering up burst balloons before the little ones ate them. Obviously my son had no idea he was one, and was oblivious throughout.

I'd know better now, but I'm in no position to criticise anyone wanting to do inappropriate things supposedly for their babies.

I never knew what sex any of my 3 DC were, I only ever had one quick grainy scan with the third. My DS & his wife didn’t want to know with theirs and both were a lovely surprise. My DD’s both found out but didn’t have a reveal party or a baby shower for any of them. It all seems to have really taken off in the last few years. My daughter went to a baby shower a few months ago and the mum to be and the grandma (her own mum) had spent a fortune on the venue, the buffet, outfits, hair, makeup, nails etc. The next time my DD met up with her friend she was moaning about not having enough money to get all the baby stuff she wanted!!!

Like the OTT hen & stag do’s, reveal & baby shower parties are not my idea of fun but maybe I’m just getting to be a grumpy old woman Each to their own as they say, it does seems to be the norm now.

Regarding prams, yes my mum brought mine too & it was kept up on the top floor of the shop until my first baby was safely here, my DH picked it up while I was still in hospital, lovely big bouncy pram, all my babies slept like logs when they were out in it. I walked for miles with it over the first few months.

I knew what all of mine were at the halfway mark of pregnancy. I'd never have done a reveal party though. I just told people who wanted to know.

What if the parents discover the child is not the sex they wanted, and this does happen, or possibly, that it had some problems and might be born disabled? Do you cancel the party?