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Is it friendlier Up North?

(157 Posts)
DaisyAlice Wed 07-Dec-22 13:40:40

Today's UK Loose Women programme decided that people are more friendly in the North than South. I live in the South of the South, lucky enough to have a view of The Isle of Wight. I'm always surprised that some media only consider that London is South. I find people very friendly where I live, as does my friend who lives in Leeds. Surely, there are friendly people everywhere.

Redhead56 Tue 13-Dec-22 01:06:54

Bikergran our DD house looks onto Pendle hill I agree you are friendly folk there.

Granjeanne Tue 13-Dec-22 00:36:58

I have to defend the Londoners. I regularly travel across London with a suitcase, and often alone. I have never yet had to carry my suitcase up or downstairs on the underground, but in Paris (where I often travel, as my daughter lives in Versailles), nobody has ever offered to help with my suitcase. There is no language barrier, as I am bilingual! But a lot depends on your own demeanour. Last week I was travelling between Paris and Versailles with my husband, who has Parkinson's disease. I got talking to a guy sitting opposite us, who was of Afro-Caribbean origin. He was so lovely. He told me about his recent trip to London, to visit a friend who plays for Spurs, and also told me about a relative who is in the Senegal team and played at the recent World Cup match in Qatar. When we reached our stop, he left his seat and walked down the train, carrying all our luggage onto the platform for us, although it wasn't even his stop! On the way, he noticed a forgotten laptop in a case, and returned it to it's owner. A true Good Samaritan! I honestly believe that there is good in most people, and you only discover it by being friendly and making the first move. I have grown up in the south of England but my mum was from Manchester and taught me to be friendly. So I often talk to "strangers" and usually find them friendly too. We have recently moved and I am already on friendly terms with some of the neighbours, generally those with whom I have made an effort. They will all get Christmas cards. It just takes someone to make the first move!

veejay Mon 12-Dec-22 00:45:28

I have loved in villages too.and wouldn't want to live in another one
The places I have loved in in Yorkshire are all different as well I live in North Yorkshire now.but not as friendly as some other places in Yorkshire
The village I loved in was one where if you weren't a member of the.local village women's clubs you were always considered an outsider

OnwardandUpward Sun 11-Dec-22 10:29:27

hilz

I think no matter where you are in this world that if you present a nice smile and say a cheery hello most respond in a similar way. Maybe a bit different in larger towns or cities to villages but its about reading the situation surely. How you present yourself oh and a smile. Never fo rget the smile.

They do, politely- but unless you are a local you will never get anything more, in some places. They are simply being polite and do not want to know you. I have lived in my present village over 20 years and nothing has changed. I am an outsider with acquaintances and that is all I'll ever be, here.

bikergran Sun 11-Dec-22 08:56:21

missed apostrophe soz.

bikergran Sun 11-Dec-22 08:54:48

North Lancashire here, not far from Pendle Hill I think we are all pretty much a friendly bunch here but then we are, all Witches! you know) lol so beware, we may cast a spell.

Riverwalk Sun 11-Dec-22 08:49:20

Especially walking past the pubs and everyone singing. You wouldnt get that down South

Thank goodness! grin

hilz Sun 11-Dec-22 07:54:50

I think no matter where you are in this world that if you present a nice smile and say a cheery hello most respond in a similar way. Maybe a bit different in larger towns or cities to villages but its about reading the situation surely. How you present yourself oh and a smile. Never fo rget the smile.

OnwardandUpward Sun 11-Dec-22 02:17:25

I loved Yorkshire. Especially walking past the pubs and everyone singing. You wouldnt get that down South. Yorkshire is a lot more friendly and kind, for sure.

Arto1s Sat 10-Dec-22 22:10:26

Have lived in many areas of the UK, and in the US now for 35 years. Still think Yorkshire is the friendliest place I have ever lived.

OnwardandUpward Sat 10-Dec-22 12:03:23

Daisy Alice its good to air these views, so thankyou for posting. I have for some time been sad for the way very nice people are treated in the workplace. Its the way bullies operate. They perceive someone else as "better" (or perceive that they are snobby or think they're better). Maybe this is purely down to accent. They then proceed to bully the person, mercilessly verbally and through relational aggression (gossip and exclusion)

I saw this in a workplace situation only yesterday. The person being targeted had gone to private school (through no fault of their own!) yet was being bullied and harassed for it. Yes, some people have had incredibly privileged lives, but they did not choose which family to be born into or what school to go to- and they deserve to be accepted like anyone else. The person in question is incredibly nice and polite yet the bully has the most lowly job in the place.

Sad to say, bullies are often insecure and think that blowing out someone else's candle makes theirs burn brighter. It doesn't. We see you.

People who ostracize others for being "different" are themselves the problem and were obviously not brought up right. My friend in the workplace who is picked on because of her schooling and background is someone who helps the homeless and is actually suffering from depression and really struggling. She doesn't think she is better. Other people think she is.

Daddima Sat 10-Dec-22 11:38:07

I am reminded of the tale of the stranger approached an old man on his way into a town and asked what the people were like. The old man asked what the people were like in his last town. The stranger said they were very friendly and helpful, so the old man replied that he would find the people much the same here.
Soon another stranger came along and asked the same question, and the old man again asked what the people were like in his last town.
“ Oh, they were nasty and unfriendly”, was the reply.
“ Well, I think you’ll find them much the same here”, said the old man.

A lot of truth in that.

DaisyAlice Sat 10-Dec-22 11:25:03

Thank you for all your posts. I hadn't expected such a response, especially as I was just jumping on the back of the Loose Women's discussion. I apologise if anyone was offended, it certainly wasn't my intention. Its nice to know that there are GN's local to me and we appreciate the same places. I think the conclusion is that there are friendly people to be found everywhere which is what I said in my original post. Have a lovely weekend everyone, wherever you are spending it.

OnwardandUpward Sat 10-Dec-22 11:23:37

I find it really sad for anyone foreign or from a different area who is ostracized because someone is not "from there" and think the attitude is ignorant and rude.

None of us chose where to be born and it's extremely small minded to choose to keep someone out because they were not born there. Some ignorant people do judge others on where they were born and say that people born down South "think they're better", which is mostly not the case.

I have met some lovely people, many of whom have been bullied by people who are threatened by the place they grew up (insert nice village) and then bullied them for it.

"You think you're better" seems to be the accusation that they face. I don't think the people in question do think they are better, in fact they are humble , unassuming and hardworking- but the butt of jokes and bullying just because of where they grew up.

I think some people like to feel superior, so they attack anything that they think is "better". Hopefully those same people would be kinder to our immigrants.

HeavenLeigh Sat 10-Dec-22 11:19:17

I would say it is, but I’m a friendly person anyway and I speak to everyone.

Purplepoppies Sat 10-Dec-22 11:03:04

I'm a southerner living in Scotland.
I was met with some hostility in my public facing job initially, people who would refuse to be served by me etc.
But on the whole people are friendly.
I don't find people more or less friendly here in comparison.
I have met nice people everywhere I have travelled.
Maybe it's about your own attitude to life 🤷🏻‍♀️
The sweeping generalisations about whole populations is ridiculous really.

overthehill Sat 10-Dec-22 09:28:17

He he

youtu.be/PT0ay9u1gg4

Nanatoone Sat 10-Dec-22 07:52:34

I find this conversation interesting but really annoying as well. People are the same the world over and reading some of these comments I do feel so sorry for immigrants to our Island. How on earth do they feel when we don’t feel like we belong in various places in our own country? I do know that I felt very glad to be home (back in the UK, not where I came from in Devon) after living abroad with the RAF as I understood everything and this gave me insight into how difficult it is to settle into a new country rather than a new county.

Gundy Sat 10-Dec-22 07:49:40

There are Scrooges everywhere and Lovers everywhere you turn. Find your Tribe. Be happy!
Cheers!
USA Gundy

nanna8 Sat 10-Dec-22 03:55:37

Tasmania was like that when we lived there. You had to have lived there at least 50 years to be a ‘local’. That was in the 1980s though and I think things are better now, at least I hope so.

OnwardandUpward Sat 10-Dec-22 00:42:43

I would like to live where I was born so no one can try to make me feel I don't belong anymore.

OnwardandUpward Sat 10-Dec-22 00:37:55

It is irritating and rude when you go to Wales on holiday and the locals decide to only talk to you in Welsh after they know you're from England. My Mother in law only went to Wales once and she said " they want you to stand at the border and throw your money in" . Well it does feel a bit like that and since we visited Laugharne, I am in no hurry to return.

We live in a Southern village where we'll never be accepted because we were not born here. Dog walkers are the only (friendly) people I talk to, apart from colleagues.

nanna8 Sat 10-Dec-22 00:26:57

When a group of us used to visit north Wales that always happened, we just laughed it off. I didn’t bother telling them I was probably more Welsh than they were. You always get a few ignoramuses.

OnwardandUpward Sat 10-Dec-22 00:22:58

IrishDancing

In my experience (I have moved, gradually, from Hertfordshire to the north east of Scotland) there is no difference in friendliness or helpfulness. We were in London recently and everybody we met was lovely. Only on Skye and in Snowdon have we ever felt out of place - people quickly lapsed into Gaelic and the Welsh language when we entered shops.

Re Skye and Snowdon, I do think that's extremely rude , very pointed and poor customer service to lapse into a foreign language when people come into your shop just because they are not local. I've experienced similar when going into shops run by people who speak Asian languages.

It just feels so rude and unnecessary when you know they can speak English. It feels like they deliberately make you feel uncomfortable and only want your money. I do avoid shops like this when I can and prefer to spend money where someone will have the decency to be polite and have good customer service.

veejay Fri 09-Dec-22 23:15:32

Sorry a few typos.hope you can understand them