Did your parents make you stand up for adults on public transport?

Its reasuuring to know that my parents and grandparents were not the only ones who insisted on this. I was also made to give up my chair to visitors. The TV was immediately switched off when someone called, even if it was only a neighbour calling to borrow something. I hated that if I was watching something.

We called all adults Mr and Mrs if we did not know them. Family friends were Uncle and Auntie. I can also remember that in the 1960s in work I never called the older staff by their first names and they always called me Miss Biglouis. I would never have dreamed of asking an older staff member a personal question such as how much they earned, or why they had never had children.

It seems a lifetime away now but even in the "swinging sixties" it was a much more kindly and well mannered world than we have now.

I was taught as a child that if you were sitting down and an adult was standing , then you offered them your seat. An adult give up a seat so a child could sit down? No way!

I usually find that on a crowded Tube train I'm offered a seat which I accept gracefully and gratefully. On occasion I have stood in front of a young person sitting in the seat nominally reserved for pregnant/elderly people and if they haven't voluntarily moved, I've pointed out the "priority" notice and generally get an apology and the seat. There are compensations to being old!

I always did. I didn’t go on public transport with my parents though so not sure where I learned that from. Maybe my Nan. My 11 year old hasn’t been on public transport for years so wouldn’t know that’s a thing.

Of course, I did not need a seat. I was also told to hold doors open and say please and thank you.

I must admit it is only recently that I have taken up the offer of a seat on the bus and tube although I do fight to get DH a seat!

I was expected to give up my seat. I was giving the option of sitting on my mother's lap, but I usually considered standing was less embarrassing.

It must be exasperating for people who are returning from a working day, having paid for a ( very expensive) season ticket - to stand and view a seated child ( ticket price £1)
On the subject of folk spreading out over several seats, I once tried to sit next to a man who had taken over a table for four. He made such a fuss that I sat elsewhere. At the next stop, three young women boarded, sat at his table and proceeded to have a lovely time, drinking fizz, eating a picnic, doing their make up etc. I enjoyed his undisguised fury from a few seats away.

Maggiemaybe I've had that happen to me too, I mean how dare we expect so sit in the seat we went to the trouble of reserving.

I had a train seat reserved and a young woman who’d set up shop there was quite put out when I pointed out that she was sitting in it. “But I’m working”, she said, and seemed astonished that I wasn’t prepared to let her carry on while I stood for the next hour. I’ve never seen a laptop snapped shut so viciously.

I don't remember TBH but I do remember giving up my seat.

Definitely stood up for adults, but not sure where the directive came from initially. Like most children, we were taught in school to stand up when an adult entered the room, and at home always understood that I would give my chair up to visitors. Therefore it followed on that I did so on public transport, despite the fact that there were not many opportunities to use public transport in the small market town where I grew up. I remember clinging on for dear life on the tube in London, having given up my seat and feeling certain that I would get trampled underfoot! I believe it was all part and parcel of basic good manners, saying please and thank you, not speaking with your mouth full and using cutlery correctly. It was expected of you, and you did it. Being taught these basics at an early age you just added to them as you grew up, and they hopefully became automatic.

Oh I don't know! I was hauled out of a bus seat once or twice by my grandmother as a child, to stand for an adult, I'm not sure about my parents, we were either on a train and the occasion didn't arise, or in a car. My thoughts are I'd give up my seat to whoever needed it the most, I could really have done with a seat once or twice when I was pregnant and commuting, not always visible until the end, I'd gladly give up my seat for a woman in such a situation, or someone disabled. If I had children or grandchildren with me then I'd possibly suggest that would be a kind thing to do. I think my sons would definitely do that and tell me they have done so happily when they felt someone needed a seat. One young man gave up his seat for me on the London underground and after I'd gratefully accepted my thoughts were "he thinks I'm old"

I did read the MN thread, I thought the mother sounded somewhat unreasonable.

Slightly off topic the people who annoy me the most on trains are the ones who "set up office" so they purloined the seat next to them and anyone who had the temerity to ask them to move their stuff they would often do so with really bad grace, huffing and puffing, I remember one such occasion I really wanted to ask "paid for two seats have you?"

It was a given in the 60s and I didn't even think about it. Slight aside BlueBelle. Respect for elders and I was thrilled to have Aunties and Uncles as my blood relative A and U were in Rhodesia so we didn't see them very often.

Yes, once I was too big to sit on her knee.
That said, I don't remember it being necessary very often, but it was well-drummed into us that it was the correct thing to do should that situation arise.
Even now, in my sixties, I would still offer my seat to someone who I thought needed it more than I did.

It was also expected that we children would sit on the floor at home if there were visitors needing a seat. This practice too seems to have disappeared from many houses that I have visited in recent years.

Yes we used the buses and trains a-lot & always stood up for adults. It doesn’t seem to be the case very often now. I was on a crowded train the other day when a woman got all huffy because someone asked her to move her bag from the seat next to her so they could sit down. This happens a lot, people taking up a seat for their bags while people are stood up, it’s so wrong.

Of course we were taught to stand / respect adults.

We were not demanded Violetsky if you were young you sat on your mums knee to make a free seat and when you got a bit older you stood up I can remember feeling very proud and grown up to do it and know I was giving my seat to an older person
We always called mum or dads friends uncle or aunty never by their first name and we held doors open for others going through its just good manners isn’t it ?

I ws taught to stand for adults and my school expected us to, especially when in school uniform.

I would still offer my seat to someone who was less able to stand than me.

Yes and also to hold doors open.

Pregnant women, elderly or disabled have always taken priority with me. I’ve always taught my sons the same. But I’ve never compelled my sons to just stand up for any adult simply because they were an adult. That makes no sense to me. At the same time, I’d never get into a spat with a stranger because they wouldn’t stand up for my child. I’ve just never been so entitled. I find the young mum’s attitude entitled, and I find adults expecting children to stand up just because they’re older than them entitled. I’m not a fan of entitled people.

Not only on transport, but at home too.

Absolutely, and my children (and grandchild) would do the same. I would give up my seat to anyone I thought needed it more. I always hold doors open for people too.

Yes, I did. I couldn’t now though!

I did it, whether it was my parents or general expectation I have no idea.

I still do do it, if I see someone more in need of a seat than me.

My parents and grandparents always used the expression "your elders and betters" to us children. It was an acknowledgement that adults had served to the community and were deserving of respect for their contribution. I see nothing wrong with that. Now there seems to be a general sense of entitlement from people who have contributed little or nothing.

Yes, when I was young, ditto with my children and now my grandchildren.

I have on occasion, scooped up one or both on to my knee to give another person a seat, however if I had paid for seat
( eg train) it would only be for elderly person, disabled person or pregnant lady ).

My husband (70) still offers his seat, to any woman without a seat.