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Restaurant group meals – splitting the bill or just paying your own share?

(88 Posts)
Cabbie21 Sat 05-Aug-23 16:23:30

When I used to meet former colleagues for a meal, some of us soon realised that one person was having several courses and a glass of Prosecco and expecting to split the bill equally, when most of us had one course and a cheaper drink, especially if driving. So the next time we all ordered several courses, thus making her share of a bigger bill much higher. After that, it was agreed that we each pay our own.

BlueBelle Sat 05-Aug-23 16:22:09

I got stitched up twice with a group some unknown to me and all a lot better off they had alcohol and afters and more expensive firsts and i got a far far bigger share of the bill than what I d eaten but I wouldn’t be caught again
Different if I’m taking my children or grandchildren out for a meal
When I meet up with my school friends or even just one or two friends we always each pay for ourselves Seems normal for us

Ladyleftfieldlover Sat 05-Aug-23 16:16:41

Our U3A lunch club meets monthly. Some people have three courses, other only two. Some have alcohol, others don’t. We pay our bills individually and it works fine.

ParlorGames Sat 05-Aug-23 16:14:45

If we have invited anyone out for a meal then we are prepared to pay the whole bill and this has always worked very well as most 'guests' will volunteer the tip so everyone is happy.

However, the last time we joined OH's brothers, at their invitation, we were well and truly stitched up - lo and behold one had forgotten his bank card and the other had no money at all blaming a change in clothes on his empty pockets, neither had even enough for a decent tip. Therefore, we had to foot a very expensive bill plus the tip, both had promised to credit our bank account with their share but as yet nothing has appeared - I won't hold my breath and I'm in no hurry to repeat the experience as we are retired and they are all working in well paid jobs.

The group of friends who we occasionally dine out with are totally different, we mostly spend around the same amount which basically makes it fair all round, we then all put in tips for the staff.

Aveline Sat 05-Aug-23 16:13:58

I was once stung by people doing that and ended up having to pay the £70 shortfall. Everyone just put in what they said they were due and left. Selfish sods.

foxie48 Sat 05-Aug-23 16:13:47

Totally depends on who I am out with. Generally I either split the bill equally or with some friends we take it in turns to pay. I go out with one group of friends and they prefer to pay for what they eat and drink + a share of the tip. If I'm with someone who only has a starter + a soft drink and I have a main and a couple of drinks because they are driving, I pay or we pay according to what they insist on!

biglouis Sat 05-Aug-23 16:10:47

Thinking more here of large friendship or work groups rather than family or small groups of intimate friends. If someone has a starter, expensive main and pudding with several glasses of wine then it would be most unfair to ask somone who had a soft drink and only a veggie main to split.

Ive always found the simplest way is to take cash, leave the appropriate amount on the table and then go to the loo or leave the restaurant and let those who want to split the bill argue it out. Or ask the waiter at the beginning of the meal for a separate bill.

Riverwalk Sat 05-Aug-23 16:06:09

Next week I'm off to France, there are five of us and we fortuitously eat and drink about the same, so we will just as usual divide by five and put in the required Euros.

I couldn't be doing with separate bills.

When younger I've been out with groups, e.g. colleagues and been stung by those who've ordered the most expensive dishes and drunk lots, but nowadays I don't go out in large groups on the razzle!

timetogo2016 Sat 05-Aug-23 16:00:59

We go halves or we pay the whole bill,depending on who we are out with.

Smileless2012 Sat 05-Aug-23 15:55:46

We usually split the bill equally but it depends who we are with but if some have had for example a bottle wine, a starter and/or desert it isn't fair to expect them to pay for more than they had.

If we knew our percentage of the bill was less expensive, we'd say who and pay accordingly. That never seems to happen though as we always have a bottle of wine.

Jaxjacky Sat 05-Aug-23 15:54:19

I only eat out with family or a couple friends now, so the bill is split equally, or we’re paying for family.
When I used to eat out with work colleagues the bill would be split equally, including soft drinks for any designated drivers.

tanith Sat 05-Aug-23 15:48:08

We share the bill equally I’m usually eating with family when I go out so no one minds.

biglouis Sat 05-Aug-23 15:43:44

Saw a discussion over on Mumsnet where an OP on a budget got bamboozled into paying for far more (£40) for her own food and non-alcoholic drink when the bill was split. Several members of the party had an expensive main and wine. Of course she grumbled about it afterwards but felt she could not say anything at the time as she would have “felt awkward”.

My feeling is that if everyone has much the same thing – say within £5 - then splitting is the easiest way to go. However I have never hesitated to just pay for my own plus a tip contribution if what I had was a great deal less expensive.

What would you do? Insist upon paying for your own/separate bill – or just subsidise others and resent is in silence?