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Selling jewelry/downsizing

(44 Posts)
Nanamar Tue 26-Sept-23 16:49:39

My late husband bought a lot of jewelry for me and I got him - he liked rings and wore one on each finger. Prior to his long illness and death two years ago, the pandemic, etc. we attended theater regularly, dined out frequently, and I used the lovely gold and gemstone pieces when I dressed up. I now live in very different circumstances, in casual Southern California with my son and family; we really never go out to restaurants or attend any event requiring “dressing up” and these pieces have sat unworn since we moved here after my husband’s death. I can’t foresee my life reverting to my former ways and I’m contemplating selling things. My DIL doesn’t wear jewelry, I have no nieces and just one son and grandson so bequeathing them doesn’t seem relevant. I would of course not sell everything so there would still be some special things of decent value when I am gone. It seems as if the sentimentality of keeping these items is a waste. Have any of you come to a decision about “downsizing” in this manner?

Nanamar Tue 26-Sept-23 16:50:38

Sorry typo - I meant that I bought jewelry for him too.

grannypiper Tue 26-Sept-23 16:57:38

In your shoes i would take photos of them all and spend a few moments saying goodbye to each item before selling all but the most sentimental pieces. Ask friends for recommendations regarding a trustworthy place to sell.

wildswan16 Tue 26-Sept-23 17:03:48

It makes perfect sense to "downsize" your jewellery now. You will be able to take the time to find the right place to sell them and say "goodbye" to them.

If you leave it till after you die then your family will have all the hassle of doing the same thing.

Callistemon21 Tue 26-Sept-23 17:12:31

Keep your favourite pieces and sell the rest.
You could spend the money making happy memories, a lovely holiday, perhaps?

foxie48 Tue 26-Sept-23 17:15:31

MIL gave her decent jewellery away with the instruction, keep it remodel it or sell it. If you don't think any of your family would want anything, then sell. I've already given things to my 2 daughters and when my grandchildren are of the right age, I'll give away a few more bits but I've ear marked a few pieces for friends who are a lot younger than i am.

FindingNemo15 Tue 26-Sept-23 18:23:31

I have recently put all but one piece of jewellery in an upcoming auction. I am estranged from my DD, never go anywhere to wear it and cannot see that changing. Hope I have done the right thing.

Kathmaggie Fri 29-Sept-23 12:27:09

A friend of mine sold all her jewellery given to her by late husband and bought a beautiful gold bracelet that she wears every day.

Quizzer Fri 29-Sept-23 12:39:46

I inherited a heavy gold charm bracelet from my mother. The charms were personal to her from places she had visited. I was never going to wear it so I sold it and used the money to buy a piece of jewellery I loved. When I wear it it reminds me of her.

Sandwichnan Fri 29-Sept-23 12:43:43

I did the same as Kathmaggie. After three husbands and their relevant wedding and engagement rings, together with other jewellery from them, I sold the lot and bought myself a gold necklace, which I shall wear always! I did check with my children and they weren’t interested in my jewellery, except for some diamond earrings that my daughter liked which she now has. smile

biglouis Fri 29-Sept-23 12:50:15

I inherited some beautiful antique and vintage jewellery from my grandmother when she died. Although I love antiques (she knew that) I am not a jewellery wearer so I kept a couple of pieces to remind me of her and sold the rest. Inheriting the contents of her house was what started me off trading in antiques in the late 1970s/early 1980s. Before that I had been simply a "serious collector". The really good pieces I sold at Christies to get the best prices. I invested the money in going to university to improve my qualifications. She would have approved of that.

crazyH Fri 29-Sept-23 12:54:29

I am at that stage -considering what to do with my few possessions. Most of my jewellery will go to my daughter, because my daughters-in-law will inherit from their mothers anyway. My daughter is divorced and so will only inherit from me. But I will certainly leave the girls one or two pieces. I have a Royal Doulton Dinner service which nobody wants. Someone suggested selling them on FB Marketplace ? Sorry to hijack Nanamar’s thread ..

ExaltedWombat Fri 29-Sept-23 13:06:23

First step is to find out if the market price for your items is anything like the 'valuations' you've been using for insurance purposes. I hope you're not TOO disappointed!

Dogmum2 Fri 29-Sept-23 13:17:20

Yes, i am currently going through a similar process. Pieces i have inherited i am giving DD and niece, with photographs and written stories/memories of the people i inherited them from. (Yes, i asked them first if they would like them).

More personal items, wedding/engagement rings i still wear daily, are for my DD/DGC.

Stuff i don't wear and no-one wants is being sold and proceeds into the 'bucket list' pot.

I have immense pleasure in giving things away, writing down memories of individuals and also the 'stories' of my own items, where and when we were engaged, where DH proposed etc.

My DH who is ex-military is also doing the same with his medals. Writing memories/stories of when/why he received them.

We are both finding this a really nice thing to do.

Gundy Fri 29-Sept-23 13:42:28

You’ll be shocked when you go to sell your fine gold or precious stone (diamonds, etc) jewelry as to how little you will get for those items. You will never recoup what you “think” they’re worth.

At this point it’s all sentimental to you.
I like what Kathmaggie suggested - take all proceeds from selling and buy one piece for yourself that you would wear every day as a token of remembrance and beauty of your husband. He would approve!

A simple, beautiful bracelet that can be worn with all wardrobe from sporty to dress. It will become like a wedding ring to you. You won’t leave home without it.
USA Gundy

JuBut Fri 29-Sept-23 13:45:19

Sell them, you have your memories. Make new memories with the money

grandtanteJE65 Fri 29-Sept-23 13:59:57

Like you I have a lot of jewelery that I no longer wear, and no-one to bequeath it to who will appreciate it. I also have a lot of silver cultlery I have inherited and various other "good" things.

My husband and I have dicussed selling some of the things that have no particular sentimental value, as we feel we might as well sell them for what we can get and use the money as a little extra, as we realise that we will not get a lot of money for these things.

Right now these plans have been shelved, as DH is seriously ill, so it seems tactless to talk about selling things right now, as we live in Denmark which has excellent health-care funded by our taxes, so we don't have to sell things.

Later, by which I mean, if I am left a widow far earlier than I had ever thought to be, then I will go ahead and sell and then decide what to do with the money that comes in.

There seems no point in hanging on to things that have no sentimental value when I know well that they will all end up in the nearest charity shop or the council dump after my death.

She777 Fri 29-Sept-23 14:36:27

I have some nice rings and a couple of nice watches that cost me a decent amount of money. We have always said from the moment all these were bought is that I would sell them all at auction when I reached 70 and that money would then be spent on trips away until it ran out or our health deteriorated to a point we can’t travel.
I think it’s a very sensible thing to do for yourself.

Also my mum has lots of rings and is always telling people which one is left to them and not one of us likes the one that has been earmarked for us. Thankfully I managed to get her to sell lots of her jewellery and spend every penny of it on herself with lots of little indulgences that she never would have done. I think it’s your money enjoy it whilst you can.
Don’t think it was a popular decision with some relatives.

Marg75 Fri 29-Sept-23 15:00:36

I have my late Mum's jewellery that I shall pass on to my daughter but have one ring which belonged to an Aunt that I would be happy to sell but have no idea who to go about it.

Marg75 Fri 29-Sept-23 15:02:09

How to go about it!

lixy Fri 29-Sept-23 15:10:05

Marg75 ask advice at your local auction house if you have one - they often have valuation days any you can book an appointment for free. Their advice is impartial; there's no obligation to sell through them.
You often see people on Flog It or similar doing exactly what you want to do, but i have no idea about how to get onto a televised auction if that is what you would like to do.

Buffy Fri 29-Sept-23 15:19:10

To grandtanteJE65
Hoping that your husband recovers soon.

pregpaws3 Fri 29-Sept-23 15:19:59

I have no family to leave my jewellery to. I had a lot of gold pieces I no longer liked including a defunct gold bracelet watch so I had it all melted down and made into a rough gold nugget and now I can enjoy all those old bits and pieces on a chain as a pendant .

cc Fri 29-Sept-23 16:12:52

I'm afraid that you wouldn't get anything like the insurance valuation of your jewellery. I'm guessing you'd be lucky to get 50%. This may change your mind about whether you'd want to sell it all.
My husband has always liked to buy me jewellery and insuring it is pretty expensive now but, like Nanamar, I don't really go out to places where I could wear it now.

Sarahr Fri 29-Sept-23 16:25:20

Go for it. Treat yourself with the proceeds, whether it's funding a holiday, new hobby or taking the whole family for a great day out.