Need to regain my confidence

Kiwiqueen you seem to have solved the driving problem with your new car. To help you build up confidence and get back to joining in with life out there in the real world, remember that it's never as bad as it looks. We are used to the technology of 10-20 and more years ago where you had to do a lot of the thinking for the machine. Nowadays it is usually one step ahead and you can skip a lot of steps. (Not sure if that makes sense)

In other words, don't overthink things. For example, you look out at the rain and think "I don't want to go out in that", but when you actually get outside, you realise it's only spitting a bit and you hardly need an umbrella.

The same is the case if you are looking at a machine to pay for a parking ticket, cash machine, or anything else where you have to press buttons or use a touch screen. Take a deep breath, make sure you are looking at the whole screen and everything around it - the answer will be there somewhere. If someone is waiting behind you, apologise to them and, if necessary, ask them for help (this should sweeten and shorten their waiting time)

If it's physical stuff you are apprehensive about, such as carrying shopping or filling up the car at the petrol station, don't be afraid to smile nicely and ask for help. As other threads here this morning have said, people can be kind.

You are not on your own - don't worry!

I broke my left foot many years ago - and have done it again since - silly me! I was so relieved that I had an automatic car as I was able to drive because my left foot in plaster was redundant.

When I first had it I found that I adapted to it very quickly and I am sure you will too. I have recently had a new car and that took a while to get used to, but I think I've cracked it now. I love that it beeps at me when parking - and a lot when I have to pull into the hedge on the local lanes!

I know it is hard when you have been off the road for a spell, but it really will come back to you and you will get your confidence back.

Book yourself a driving lesson or two. My friend did just that and is much happier driving now. It doesn't matter that you are already a qualified driver. Any good driving instructor will be happy to take you out and teach you what you need to know.

Take heart from all these comments, I’m an other who around three years ago went into my first automatic apprehensively but it was brilliant I love it! I still switch between that and a manual and enjoy both cars for different reasons.

I got an automatic Mini Cooper which is a joy to drive.I always drove manual cars but since having cataract issues and arthritis in my knees an automatic isa godsend.It is a confidence booster and I am much happier driving than I was before.

Iamroadsmart does courses, including for older or returning drivers. Would be best to go with someone professional to hone your driving skills. Once you feel confident to go out and about again, the rest will follow

Just remind yourself that your licence covers you to drive it, therefore you do have the skills needed.
Last year, the taxi my daughter booked for a 2am flight, never came so they had to take their van to the airport without prebooked parking. They phoned and asked if I could go to their house, get the key and bring it back to my house to save extortionate parking fees - only when I got there did I realise it was an automatic! I have driven an automatic hire car 22 years ago for 2 days, but luckily, for me I remembered what I needed to do and once I found the handbrake (really low down - practically under the seat!) I really enjoyed driving it. I'm 69 but if I ever change my car I would get an automatic based on that experience. I loved it, and am sure you will too. Have faith in yourself!

I used to drive automatics but if I went back to one now I'd be unsure. Why not contact a driving instructor to see if you could be taken out for a familiarisation lesson or two.

I have been driving an automatic for about 10 years now. Don't worry you will get the hang of it very quickly. Just take a deep breath and go a couple of miles. You'll wonder why you worried.

I got an automatic car after a stroke. I absolutely love it! Automatic wipers, lights, parking( even though I am scared to try that yet) am sorry I didn’t get one years ago.
Go for it! It will make your life so much easier.

Go to your nearest largish car park at a quiet time and practise away to your heart's (and confidence!) content. Good luck. I'm very pleased for you. Onwards.....

I was advised by my consultant to buy an automatic after a serious accident that left me needing a titanium left shoulder and upper arm replacement. I’m so pleased I did as I was able to drive again 4 months after surgery. Take it easy, rest your left foot on the floor - my car has a footplate for the left foot. I’m sure you will slowly regain confidence and enjoy driving again. Good luck!

We changed our manual car for a automatic. Like you, I'm the only driver and having driven manuals for over 40 years I was worried.

Took to it like a duck to water, almost. It only took me a couple of drives to get used to it.

Go for it, enjoy

My husband has arthritis in his knees and the left one is the worst. One day he had to lift his leg up to use the clutch so reluctantly got rid of his car and bought an automatic. His knee is much less painful now.

I love my auto. No rolling back on hills. Over taking easy. I would say, when in a traffic queue stay back a little further, just as a precaution, from car in front in case you lurch forward. While you practice.

My 10 year old automatic fiesta has a hand break .... didn’t know they were being phased out.
It does have a press button starter and I don’t need to use keys to get into it but best of all it has heated seats.

Have you a good friend who drives an automatic and likes it?

If so, ask if they will accompany you on a couple of short drives as an instructor.

Or simply phone a driving school and ask for a couple of lessons, telling them what you wrote here.

Preg paws 3 As I said quiet place quiet time not likely to hit anything The lack of handbrake sounds appealing. A few years ago recovering from broken wrist
Was out with friend and parked on a hill. It was a two woman job getting away without rolling back

Well done for driving again after a long gap Mouse. and yes automatic cars are so easy.

I started to drive again three years ago after a gap of ten years. Not bc only that but my car was an automatic which I’d never driven before. I booked three lessons to boost my confidence before I took possession of the car and never looked back. I certainly would never go back to a manual.

My ex racing driver husband used to take me to a empty supermarket car park whenever we had a new car and have me drive round at different speeds to build up my confidence. Then he’d ask me to manipulate all the controls for lights etc until I could use them automatically. Parking and reversing was another part of my training and yes he’d even had me on a skid pan, but it was all so helpful .
I’m now in my late 70s but he won’t let me drive his current motor …. Too fast for a grey haired lady !!

When I got my first automatic I was very nervous, I thought I'd be out of control, not only by using an automatic but because I'd spent so many years on the continent driving on the other side of the road. However, by the time I'd driven the 20 miles home I realised how simple they are to drive and I can't imagine ever going back to a car with a gearstick. I'm sure you'll be fine.

I would never go back to a geared car. I ‘m not sure why one would need to tuck your left foot behind your right. There is a foot rest for your left which won’t go anywhere or do anything if you should accidentally press in it. Much more comfortable too.

When we first bought an automatic DH told me to tuck my left foot behind my right foot to start with, so I wasn't tempted to use it. I did once put my left foot on what it thought was the clutch. Of course it was the brake and I nearly went through the windscreen. Your left foot is a lot heavier than the right.

In the 1960s, my dad was an early adopter of automatic cars. When I had a badly sprained left ankle, he let me drive his car and I had no trouble at all adapting to it. Loved it. Another time he left his car with me while he went on holiday. And I still don't have an automatic car of my own - probably never will now.