Hello, my GD recently graduated high school this year, after two years spent at home due to the pandemic in 11th grade they were finally able to return to in-classroom. She certainly seemed happy enough, had a good friend etc. When she graduated she was and we were all set for her to go to community college and then transfer to a 4 year. She seemed ready and ok. Although she did tell me she had some anxiety as to how well she would do. I said, but you made the honor society and did well in high school to which she replied, anybody could have made honor society in our school. Also, let me add that although she did well in school always her mom had to really stay on her to make sure she was caught up etc. and she did not really seem to "enjoy" school but she did very well. Also she had mentioned to me that she thought she might look into having ADHD as she does forget a lot. We agreed she should do that if she started having trouble in school. Well about a month before the college semester ended, her mom said my GD had asked to see someone about getting diagnosed with ADHD, which was fine. Then apparently, they said she was not ADHD but she did seem depressed and put her on an antidepressent which would also supposedly help her concentration. To make a long story short, the next I hear from my GD is a text (I had asked how she was doing), saying she was not doing well to be honest, was going to take a break from school and look for a job and concentrate on driving and her hobbies and getting a job. Which is all fine. Here is my dilemma and I would appreciate your opinions. I text my GD my support, I think it is fine that she wants to take a break. The issue is I would like to send her a letter telling her she is not alone, and that in fact many of her peers who had to go through the pandemic and then deal with being "normal" again, were struggling and depressed as well, and tell her it is ok, and understandable, but on the other hand, I don't really know for sure if that is really what has her upset. Was the pandemic part of the reason she feels this way, ,or is that just what I think contributed to it. does she even feel like she is depressed or ADHD or both. You see she won't really confide in me. That is all she said in that text that she wanted to take a break from school she was not doing well. Her mother said she won't even tell her how she did in her classes. Also, we only text and facetime cause I live 200 miles away, I visit occasionally and she comes visit every summer)
Sorry, I guess my question is, should I send her the letter telling her I understand how the pandemic might have contributed to her issues, blah blah blah (if she doesn't even think that), and maybe make her feel even worse, or should I just stay completely out of her issues, other than just saying I love her, if you want to talk I am here, etc, text me anytime. (and let her Mom and Dad handle the issues) as well as letting my GD try and sort it out. She is seeing a psychiatrist and is taking the depression medicine. Main question, should I butt out and just be there if she decides she wants to discuss her problems, as I have told her she can anytime etc., or should I send the letter because I think that may be the issue and I want her to know I understand if that is why she is feeling that way, but if that is not the issue I may make her just think it is the issue and feel worse.
Live over 225 miles away from family
What is your favourite healthy vegetarian meal?
