The child benefit situation is a good example of why I don't think that means-tested benefits are fair.
Family 1 is a two-parent family with one child who is at school all day. One parent earns enough to allow the other to stay at home whilst the child is at school. They pay one lot of tax and NI between them. They don't pay childcare charges (which I believe are the highest in the world), don't pay commuting charges, may be able to do without a cleaner and all the other expenses that often go with working when you have a family to support. The higher earning parent earns £1 less than £X, so they get child benefit, and the SAHP gets subsidised NI, so that s/he doesn't miss out on a pension. As that parent doesn't pay any tax, their education, health, protection by the police and armed forces, use of public facilities etc are also all subsidised. The SAHP would like to work part-time. If s/he does, however, the household income would rise and they will lose the CB, and if s/he doesn't earn enough to pay NI s/he will lose out on pension contributions too, so s/he decides to stay at home and not contribute, as it would be financially pointless to work.
Family 2 is made up of two working parents, both of whom pay tax, NI, commuting charges etc and need to have a cleaner and possibly other help to run the house. Neither earns enough to cover the salary of the other to allow one of them to stay at home. They have two children, one of whom is in nursery, and the other is at school, using wraparound care before and afterwards. Both parents need to buy business clothing for work, pay for lunches etc, and even things like collections for leavers and babies (as per another thread) add up. Between them, their wages mean that they earn £1 more than £X so they won't qualify for CB under the new 'household income' rules, despite the fact that both of them work.
Family 3 is a single parent family. Mum is unskilled and was deserted by her partner, who doesn't pay maintenance, despite an order that he should. She has three children, all of whom are at school, and relies on UC to support her family, but the benefit cap means that the third child is disregarded for the purposes of benefits. She has to prove that she is looking for work, and 'prepare to work' for 35 hours a week, even though this is likely to be at minimum wage and she will not bring home more than she does on benefits. She has no choice either - if she doesn't work her benefits will be stopped.
How is this fair? And how can anyone argue that it is not social engineering, designed to favour the better off? Regardless of which lifestyle any of the families would prefer, only family 1 can afford to make the choice, as one parent earns enough for the choice to be made, yet it is family 2 who has two workers, and family 3 is no better off despite the mum .
We keep hearing that we need more 'economically active' people to pay for pensions, health, education etc, yet the government seems to be conspiring against that - but it only helps parents who can afford for one of them to stay at home. Those who can't afford this (or who make different choices) have no choice but to pay tax and NI to subsidise Family 1's choices.
It used to be the case that all families got CB regardless of who worked and how much either or both parents earned. This seems to me much fairer than favouring some lifestyles over others.