Faffing about in Older Age!

Everyone who says they aren’t gaffers. Would you notice it if you were and if so would you admit it ?
I am what I call a glitter. I start doing something then get distracted by something else and so on. If I’m not strict with myself I can go through the day doing lots of half jobs. I don’t remember this from being young.
Does anyone else recognise this trait ?

Grandmabatty

I have always been organised and I still am. I found the Mumsnet thread very ageist and fake 'amused at these old doddery parents '. I suspect it may take some folk longer to make decisions because that's their nature. Nothing to do with their age

I haven't read the Mumsnet page, but suspect that what we are dealing with here is really that at some point when we are adults (for me it was between 30 -40 it was worse) our parents and their contemporaries begin to annoy us.

I felt mine were making endless demands on my time, never realising that I was working full time because they had retired, and seemed to expect that I could and would help them with anything they felt they needed help with IMMEDIATELY.

As a teenager living at home, I had been expected to help promptly when asked (fair enough). This attitude was carried on especially by my mother, at at time in my life where it was no longer reasonable for her to expect it.

This had nothing to do with her getting older or with "faffing about" simply the much more common inability of mothers with grown up children to accept that their children are now adults with jobs and family commitments apart from parents.

So no, nothing to do with aging. If I start something, I still want to finish it fairly quickly. This has always been my nature, as apposed to others, DH amongst them, who are content to take absolute AGES to finish anything they have started ,or to make up their minds.

As yet, at 72, I have not noticed it taking me longer to make up my mind, although not having the strength I had forty years ago, it may take me a litlle longer to finish a project I have started.

I can't imagine still working full time at 73. Perhaps it's not through choice.

I'm 82 widow, none of the above bother me and I put the Rubbish bin out every month, the garden rubbish bin every other Wednesday, and the recycling trolley box each week, no trouble at all. I don't have a routine just go with the flow and as little housework as possibel

At 73, still working full time, with four dogs and a lazy husband I do not have time to faff! But I think I do things a bit slower now than I used to. I must confess I get really annoyed when behind an older person at the check-out who is taking ages, not merely through arthritic hands but gossiping and joking with the assistant. I try to tell myself this individual is probably lonely, but however lonely I might be I could never enjoy passing the time of day while holding up a queue - but so many seem oblivious!

Sounds like my dh. Bins brought in the minute they are emptied.
Same food for lunch every day.
Meals at set times and have to finish everything on plate because that’s how he was brought up.
Drives me nuts.

DH worries about food now that he's retired, what we're going to eat for our evening meal and fussed quite a bit in the kitchen: he's 73. At 71 I get irritated by his fussing but don't dither, at least not mentally. Recovering in different recent years from hip replacements I have got physically slower and more nervous about being out walking.

biglouis

I dont know about "faffing" but I am a planner and an organizer so I have a "to do" list every day which I try to get through. However I dont worry too much if some minor tasks are left at the bottom. I tend to block things off into different compartments of my life and not allow them to overflow. My nephew says I have very male attitudes.

I read threads about people who have an obsession with bins, like my former NDN. She had a mania with bins, drains and rubbish. Possibly because she had dementia coming on for years.

I find the big bins too heavy and clumsy to manage even when empty. So my nephew puts them out for me but only once they are rammed full, which takes weeks. I recycle as much paper and cardboard as possible so my bins take ages to fill. After the bin men have emptied them they generally stay there until nephew brings them back in on his next visit. I have better things to do than mess about with bins.

We have space outside for our recycling bins and a collection every week which I really appreciate. Our landfill rubbish goes in large central bins here, so I can take a carrier bagful over whenever necessary. It's easy to get rid of rubbish here.

Glorianny

I don't worry about food- whatever is in the fridge and cupboard, I'm willing to experiment, and I eat when I feel like it. I'm never sure which bin is going out this week, but as mine are never full it doesn't really matter. They go out eventually. Haven't seen a Radio Times for years. Maybe those posting on Mumsnet just know the wrong older people. The rest of us are too busy with other things to "Faff"!!

I do worry about food, more particularly having full fridge, freezer and larder. This paid off during lockdown and recently when I had Covid and flu. Even my husband could produce a meal from our supplies!
I worry less about what I'm actually going to eat, there's always something I fancy.
We no longer use standard television channels, just stream programmes on our smart TV which is great as we can watch the whole of a series when we feel like it - or catch up with the latest episodes of anything that is currently on.
My husband deals with the rubbish and takes pride in recycling much of what we produce!

Nope it didn’t resonate with me . I’m very practical and organised and love a list .
Meals , we don’t have set times and now retired sometimes have a late breakfast and miss lunch or a late lunch and miss dinner .
Bins , I check my street , especially my ndn who is a faffer and always has been.
Radio times , never used it. I use the tv guide on the tv . With iplayer and catch up , it doesn’t matter if you can’t watch something in real time .
My DH is a faffer and has got worse as he’s got older . He’s 69. But I and my AC are convinced he’s on the spectrum.
He ticks many boxes .

I think faffers tend to be perfectionists. You have to remind them that the perfect can be the enemy of the good

Thank you Witzend, I have bought from them (their bags are very useful too 🙂) but I was determined not to buy more as this is a 'stashbuster' project!

Callistemon21

lixy

*I like faffing around sorting out my yarn stash.
I've faffed and sorted today but alas, can't find the one colour I need.
A waste of all that faffing.*

Callistemon: No such thing as a waste of time when sorting out a stash. Now you have an excuse purpose to shop for that all important colour and won't waste time and money on buying a 'near miss' - or so I rationalise my stash-browsing time!

Thanks lixy, that's a relief 😁
The trouble is, I had a big tidy up a while ago and threw all the odd ball bands away, can't remember the make or shade.
It's green, but there are 50 shades of green!

Where do you buy your yarn? I had the same problem not long ago (Brand/colour of yarn) but then it dawned that since I’ve been ordering it all from Wool Warehouse for quite a while, if I look at Order History, all the brands/precise colours are there!

It did come as a bit of a shock when I saw how many orders there were, and the £££ of most of them, but heigh ho.

67, still working, definitely not a faffer (my children might argue differently but they are Wrong, I'm just clarifying arrangements).

DH does the bins but if he didn't, I would - and I'd get them out on the right days too.

Rarely if ever watch television so the Radio Times is of no interest.

If DH weren't here I'd just graze; as it is we eat roughly regularly - but I don't obsess and can usually whip up something edible from what's in the house (DH tends to do most of the shopping).

Radio Times? I get the TV schedules on line! I don't faff about meals or meal times - eat when it suits me and shop for what I need - or want. As I live in a retirement complex, when my bins are full, I take them to the communal bins and get rid of my rubbish.

I don’t regard the things you mention as negative and am not a fan of the word faff especially if it’s used inappropriately. Theres nothing dreadful about being concerned about getting your rubbish collected, nor about eating at regular intervals….or all the smaller things that concern us as we get older. In fact I think it’s a positive thing to be in this stage of life when we are able to focus on these aspects of life. It’s important to stay engaged with the wider world as well though and I think comments from younger people can be quite tunnel visioned actually. We all need to be more tolerant of our differences and stages in life,

Currently with my dad for the weekend and it’s faff central!

I'm pretty obsessed by bins. that's because there are nearly 70- dumped opposite my house because the neighbourhood is now nearly total landlords who don't complain as they rake in 3K a month from student households. In despair as I cant sell as there is HMO legislation preventing me selling to landlords as if anyone else would buy a house with that kerb appeal. ..talk about locking stable doors when horses have bolted. I dont think it is because I am old...which I am, its because I'm furious.

It’s hard on your own. Too much time to think. Unless you want to move why put your house on the market? I stayed in my home and my main worry is getting workmen (young) to turn up when they say they will!!

Sorry does not resonate with me.

So I guess I’m an unintentional faffer then! DH is diabetic and not bothered about set mealtimes thus I’m left to insist he eats regularly to help manage his condition. Personally I’d be happy to eat a meal when I’m hungry but I’m sure I’m not the only person who has to put a bit of rigour into the day!

Re. this negative and insulting view of old age I just think - faff off !

I think if you’re a ‘faffer’ then you’re a ‘faffer’ at any age!

Never mind being in control or not (or just less, which applies to most of us in one way or another) - look at your quality of life, how you feel on a day-to-day basis, your contentment levels.

Is there any problem eith leaving the bins out constantly? My neighbour puts mine out for me but if he was to leave I would not be able ho get them out of the small alleyway and down the stairs then back up again.