Letting 15 year old Son travel to Europe by rail

Yes, exactly that.
There would be terrible trouble if social services didn't at least check, so they have fulfilled their obligation, as they should in any case.

My mother lived her life in fear and anxiety, was risk averse, and overprotective, always expecting the worse, and and consequently I grew up with similar traits.

As I matured I realised how negative my attitude was, and made a conscious effort not to not pass it on to my children, encouraging confidence in them from an early age, and affording opportunities to develop independence as they got older.

Life is unpredictable at times and of course does have dangers, but I think we can only give our children the best preparation for negotiating life’s difficulties, not shielding them.

MissAdventure

I expect they do.
That's why they can't be trusted.

Indeed. I’m not criticising KA for allowing her child to travel in this way. He was with a friend who is likely from a family KA has known as neighbours or school friends. Mobile phones and credit cards no doubt meant constant contact. Not like when my cousins hitch hiked to Goa to live on the beach aged 18.
My criticism is her outrage that the social work team phoned to inform her they’d had a referral. Imagine if the team hadn’t informed her, taken no action, and who ever made the referral then alerted the press alleging two tier children’s services.
Ms A would then have been justified in Outrage. Seriously, does she expect different treatment than Ms X on a housing estate well known to agencies

I expect they do.
That's why they can't be trusted.

I think it isn’t a age thing, but more about whether that 15 & 16 year old are capable and mature enough to do this.

MissAdventure

Talk to your children all you like, trust them, if they are mature for their age.

It does mean that everyone their encounter is as trustworthy.

they might even come from families who have their disgusting washing machines in their kitchens in their ghastly new build homes

Talk to your children all you like, trust them, if they are mature for their age.

It does mean that everyone their encounter is as trustworthy.

I took myself, alone, to Geneva, aged sixteen. I'd travelled around the UK alone for years before then. I think people underestimate what teenagers are capable of.

Personally, I’d be much more worried about my teenagers partying (and almost inevitably drinking etc) at UK and European beach resorts. Even if there if some adult supervision, you certainly can’t watch them all the time. I don’t see a bigger risk in travelling in Europe, where it is much more accepted for children to travel unaccompanied to school etc from the age of 6.

What we used to do at 15 is different to now, society has changed so much. I agree you can't make them scared of life but I think it's irresponsible not to make them aware of dangers. Bad things happen, that's a fact unfortunately.

I think Kirsty Allsop is cross because the reporting was malicious rather than based on real concerns. A similar thing happened to the MP Stella Creasy earlier on this year, where someone reported her on the ground that her political views meant that her children were not being properly cared for. At various stages in family life, you may be asked if your family has ever had any contact with social services. Both of these families will now have to declare this contact for many years to come.

It’s different being expected to be somewhere and an alert would be raised if the child did not appear. I think things changed about the time of the moors murders but now people have forgotten. One of our neighbours was a policeman on that case and he said his blood ran old.Then we've had the Wests .our mindsets have changed but people forget. And of course this sort of thing doesn’t over the Channel.

4allweknow I expect whoever reported her would have gone to the press had nothing happened....of course it could have been a journalist anyway to stir up a story.

Me too, from the age of 11 I had an hours journey to high school , walking for 20 mins through parkland then getting two buses and another walk at the other end, I did this up until 15 and a half , then off to work travelling all over London, I consider that I was quite sensible and would have been fine travelling through Europe, all with the bonus of mobile phones and the internet, far too much nannying in this day and age.

Would depend on maturity of the 15 and 16 year old whether I'd let them go travelling abroad. Some 15 year olds travel far and wide in UK to attend festivals, music concerts and never heard of SS being involved. Marriage at 16 without parental permission depends on where you live in UK. 16-18 year olds still being responsibility of parents, why are parents not held responsible in courts when the teens commit offences. Amazed SS had the time to respond to the issue.

My first thought when I saw Kirstie mention her son on X was that my three boys would have loved to do that. At 15 they would all have been capable of organising themselves and travelling with a friend. Most of us would love our children to be with us forever but, hard as it is for us, good parenting means they should be independent and seeing the world for themselves

Scotsmum

In the UK you can join the army at 16.

In Scotland you can also still get married at 16. Would anyone expect the couple to stay under parental care? Just wondering…especially if they have become parents themselves.

In the army you start training at 16, you don’t go in the front line.

It may be legal to marry and have children at 16, but honestly I can’t see many people thinking it desirable at such a young age.

Obviously KA’s son had a comfortable cushion of wealth behind him which would have helped in an emergency. I would imagine from his background he would be confident and very articulate.

But I tend to think of the case of poor Jay Slater who clearly did not have the survival skills or resources to cope alone.

Lord Nelson went to sea as a midshipman at the age of 12..

I suppose it depends on the child, they may be sensible at 15. I’ve got a 31 year who holds down a responsible job, but I’m not sure I’d let him go travelling by train across Europe he’s lost more keys, wallets and passports than I can recall

Sago

I was heavily criticised for leaving our 16 year old home alone while we went for a weeks holiday.

I saw no issue with this, friends of mine were quite shocked.

He is sensible and everything was fine.

I did leave my children at home alone in their later teens, one had a party but cleared up afterwards and not too much in the way of breakages. Personally I think they could get into more trouble at home with friends egging them on.
Ms Allsopp knows her son better than we do and I’m sure she had a good talk with him before he left for Europe. She would know whether or not he’s a boozy show off yob, they are the ones who fall off balconies. The family live in London so are presumably well able to avoid doing things that incite street violence and theft.
I hope he’s enjoyed it.

I think that some 15 year olds are 10 year olds. Some 15 year olds are 30. My youngest son opened his first physical shop at 17. When I was 17 I was living away from home, lived to party and had no intelligent
capacity at all. We can fall off a balcony (hopefully won’t) at any age.

Constant struggle to put up with partners 43 year old daughter. Full of herself and always on about money! Which, incidentally is not a worry for her at all. Her daughter ( 18) just the same

rafichagran

janejudge why do you think Kirsty is a snob? I don't think she is. I just find her someone with strong opinions.

I like KA, yes she can be out spoken but so what she is obviously happy in her own skin and is not afraid of hard work.

janejudge why do you think Kirsty is a snob? I don't think she is. I just find her someone with strong opinions.

I suspect Kirsty knows her own son. I bet he had a wonderful time.
I think whoever contacted social services had a axe to grind. I would be annoyed if someone done that to me.
I dont know why it concerns other people anyway.