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Why is it called domestic violence?

(73 Posts)
Macadia Sun 01-Sept-24 05:37:41

Why don't they just call it violence? Why are so many men predators and women are not so likely to be predators? Why is it that 100 women die every month in the U.S. murdered by their husbands, partners or exes.

Macadia Mon 16-Sept-24 06:53:27

I just read that in India, 86 rapes are reported each day. It is probably twice that which are never reported. Women should not have to live like this.

Macadia Mon 16-Sept-24 06:51:27

mae13

The term "domestic violence" has, in the past, given the powers-that-be a licence to not treat violence relating to relationships with the gravity it merits.
Often it is/has been categorised as "just a domestic......" very probably not being entered into statistics.

Yes. I agree. This is my point. The word domestic added makes it seem like a family matter but no, it is against the law. Domestic or not, violence against females is just plain violence.

Macadia Tue 10-Sept-24 14:49:17

Everyone is saying three women per week are killed by their partners. It's much worse than that glibally: "Globally, a woman is killed by someone in her own family every 11 minutes, according to a 2023 UN Women study."

Iam64 Sat 07-Sept-24 19:57:50

We are talking about domestic abuse in its many forms but - we diminish the numbers of women killed every year by male partners if we begin to what about women being capable of violence
Yes women can be violent. Women sometimes sexually abuse children (often under male influence) and these things are dreadful but the level of abuse directed against women by men in an international issue

00opsidia Sat 07-Sept-24 19:52:26

Galaxy

Feminists talk about Male on female violence because of the reality. Three women a week are killed by men. Three lesbians a week are not killed by other lesbians. Thank God.

No, the violence is probably hair pulling or slapping I suppose...

I admit men killing women is a huge problem. I was only making reference to violence as I thought we were talking about that.

Galaxy Sat 07-Sept-24 19:36:43

That 1.2 rate would seem to reflect the 70 killed by partners in 2023 Iam64, that figure didnt include domestic homicide by other family members.

Iam64 Sat 07-Sept-24 19:02:16

I worked with families where domestic abuse was a theme, for over 40 years. Yes, occasional intervention needed in gay/lesbian families. The extent of violence from men to women and children was the biggest area of need.
Galaxy, the most recent stats I found referred to 1.2 women each week murdered by ex/current partner. It remains the case thst women who try to leave are at highest risk.
I was sadly relieved when `Starmer referred to it as a national emergency

Galaxy Sat 07-Sept-24 18:02:52

In the interests of my own accuracy I think its 2 women a week, I have seen some suggestions it has risen but I cant actually see evidence for that yet.
I looked at the 2023 stats for domestic homicide, there were 70 women killed by their partners (others were killed by other family members) of these 70 women, one was killed by another women.

Iam64 Sat 07-Sept-24 17:48:24

Galaxy

Feminists talk about Male on female violence because of the reality. Three women a week are killed by men. Three lesbians a week are not killed by other lesbians. Thank God.

Thanks Galaxy, the extent of abuse and murder against women by men is so horrific that I suspect that contributes to the number of ‘yes but’ posts whenever domestic abuse is under discussion
Stating the obvious and the truth doesn’t mean feminists hate men

NotSpaghetti Sat 07-Sept-24 16:47:50

00opsidia that's very interesting - and obviously a change since I worked in this field. I haven't looked it up recently - I know there was a big study in 2013 that showed abuse to be as high or higher but it included emotional and psychological abuse which was higher - I'd like to see the study if you have a link please?

I think I've also read recently (but it was probably in a newspaper!) that same sex couples can abuse by projecting negative images of themselves as gay men onto their partners. Don't quote me on this though...

Still. Whatever the statistics, they are too high - abuse is universally grim.

MissAdventure Sat 07-Sept-24 16:38:10

Yes, that's the reality.
Male on female violence has always been the most prevalent.

Galaxy Sat 07-Sept-24 16:26:20

Feminists talk about Male on female violence because of the reality. Three women a week are killed by men. Three lesbians a week are not killed by other lesbians. Thank God.

00opsidia Sat 07-Sept-24 14:30:01

NotSpaghetti

00opsidia I think this is true of abuse but not physical violence.
Would have to check it though.

I got the statistics from a women's only charity, physical violence is more likely against same sex couples.

It's women on women and men on men far more than men on women, but it's not really talked about publically except if you know, you know. I went to a charity event for said charity once and there were more lesbians there than I've ever seen in one place.

Anyone is capable of abuse. Straight people usually talk about male to female abuse, out of experience or out of fear.

Iam64 Sat 07-Sept-24 08:45:09

And once again, the attacks are by men on women they previously professed to love. This is why there needs focus on male violence

RosiesMaw2 Sat 07-Sept-24 08:42:44

And apparently not a unique occurrence - horrifying.

Iam64 Sat 07-Sept-24 08:38:02

Yes the abuse to Rebecca and other Ugandan women athletes is terrifying. The attack on her was in front of her children

RosiesMaw2 Sat 07-Sept-24 06:47:42

Didn’t they call it “wife beating” ? Back in the days when the stick used to beat your wife had to be “no thicker than your thumb”
One would have hoped we had moved from those dark days until Rebecca Cheptegei, the Ugandan marathon runner who competed in the Paris Olympics last month, died days after she was burned by her boyfriend, who threw petrol over her before setting her on fire.

mae13 Sat 07-Sept-24 04:58:10

The term "domestic violence" has, in the past, given the powers-that-be a licence to not treat violence relating to relationships with the gravity it merits.
Often it is/has been categorised as "just a domestic......" very probably not being entered into statistics.

NotSpaghetti Sat 07-Sept-24 00:39:29

00opsidia I think this is true of abuse but not physical violence.
Would have to check it though.

00opsidia Fri 06-Sept-24 21:18:51

The statistics for same sex relationships are actually worse than for straight relationships. Also, some men are abused by women and its harder for them to talk about it.

I agree with you @Iam64

Defintely being bigger and stronger can and does give them a physical/sexual advantage, whether the abuser is male or female, if a person is so inclined. But there are variations in size and strength in men or women as well as other types of abuse such as Psychological abuse, which don't concern body size or physical strength.

M0nica Wed 04-Sept-24 08:28:46

Iam64

And whilst physical strength and size matter, that isn’t why men are violent. It’s personality. Mr I was 6’6” and a kind gentle patient mann

Most men are, but if they are violent, being bigger than their victim gives them a big advantage.

As i said that goes all the way down the line. thats why at lower levels bullys hunt in packs. I was subject to svere bullying at school for about a year, and as the other girls were as bg as me, they attacked me in a group of three.

Iam64 Tue 03-Sept-24 21:58:22

And whilst physical strength and size matter, that isn’t why men are violent. It’s personality. Mr I was 6’6” and a kind gentle patient mann

Iam64 Tue 03-Sept-24 21:56:21

You’re right about the stats, this year I read 1.2 each week
It’s been consistent fir many years
Refuges were closing due to funding cuts, as were support services like the Freedom Project

TwiceAsNice Tue 03-Sept-24 17:20:37

It’s actually 2 deaths a week so even worse than quoted . It has not changed for decades and refuges are getting less rather than more . I don’t know what the answer is, as a survivor of a violent and controlling marriage I wish I did

M0nica Tue 03-Sept-24 17:05:00

It is a question of physical power. Men are bigge and stronger than women, so when crossed or thwarted they can just hit or damage the person who offends them.

It is the same as hitting and abusing childen, by parents of bothe sexes. or big boys bullying smaller children perceived as vulnerable and the same with girls.

We need to breed people where both sexes have the same hght build and strength.