What is the Worst Present You Ever Received?

Secret Santa at work : My supervisor gave me a nude calendar to open in front of everyone. Men in artistic poses. No use with husband and kids at home! Was designed to embarrass me.
Secret Santa last year at club: a small father Xmas bubble bath that looked like it was from a charity shop. Paint flaking off!
From DM me and my sister got pantie girdles and a thermal vest each. Not what young married in their 20s wanted in the 1980s! Sister was really slim too.

Earrings for pierced ears. I have never had pierced ears

None as we are very private and only a handful of very dear long standing friends and our twin daughters know the date of our birthdays.

Staffroom Christmas dip. The suggested amount was £5. I received two children's hair clasps, which I saw in What Every Woman Wants at 50p.
At least I knew what the present giver thought of me.

She used to buy a third of a pint carton of milk from the school kitchen and would ask if anyone wanted to share the cost, as she wouldn't use it all.

She was the meanest person, I have ever come across, despite having a good salary, as did her DH, living in a big house and having expensive cars and holidays.

There are two presents that spring to mind, one was the one and only Christmas gift from my DH’s brother and his wife, it was a very nasty looking 50pence plastic wash bag. It wax 1979, but they both had very good salaries. And the other was a birthday gift of an anti slip mat for the bath from my DMiL, she said we needed one for when she came to stay as she didn’t like having a bath without one.

My heavy drinker (alcoholic) ex-husband bought me a bottle of sherry, a bottle of port and a bottle of Martini. I'm tee-total.

I used to send my BILs wife a small Christmas gift as she didn't celebrate Christmas, usually a bottle of shower gel or hand cream. One year I found a brand new linen tea towel which was colourful in a charity shop so I sent that to her. We then found out that BIL would open all her Christmas gifts in advance to check they were suitable for her. He returned all our gifts that year.

DH an and I don’t really exchange Christmas gifts but one year he was very excited to present a well wrapped gift which looked rather phallic in shape. What could it be??? He assured me it was ok to open in front of the family - but imagine my surprise to find a set of 3D printed toes - created individually on his 3 D printer - which nestled inside each other like Russian dolls! He’d recently had has big toe amputated and this represented him when he had the full set. It certainly caused lots of laughs.

When we`d been married 7 years, my hubby announced he was off to Blackpool for the day with his workmates. I was really upset about it, but he said he`d ring me that night at the phone box on the corner. He said "I`ve got you a present", I was imagining perfume or a nice ornament....................... it turned out to be a shopping bag!!!

My husband once bought for my birthday, a pair of slippers which you heated up in the microwave. I’ve never suffered from cold feet and thought it was a joke at first, was very miffed when I realised it wasn’t.

My mum bought me a wynciette nightie and matching bed jacket for my 50th! I felt about 90!

Every year my MIL on Christmas day, gifted both my DDs very expensive party dresses and fur trimmed winter coats. As I had given up work to look after the girls money was exceedingly tight and of course by Christmas I had already made their party frocks and bought them Winter Coats in November and all the School, Sunday school and Brownies Christmas parties had already taken place.

The other 'worst present' was lingerie given to me via my Mum by my maiden aunt the day before our wedding with orders to pack it in my honeymoon luggage. On the wedding night I unpacked it and put it on. Turns out that it was a very pretty child sized ( I'm small) nightgown. My new Husband was shocked and immediately said 'take that off you look about 12 years old. "

One oven glove from my sister.

One Christmas back when I was a teenager, my boyfriend’s granny gave me and his brother’s girlfriend knickers - but she mixed our parcels up. I was slim and meant to get the skimpy set, other girl was larger and meant to get fuller set. Granny had no qualms announcing to the whole room. Oh no, you’re too big for those!

For Christmas every year my (wealthy) mother in law used to give us a £1 Boots token each. £1 each to DD's, £1 to DH and a £1 to me. It was a standing joke . However, one year she gave me and DD's £1 each as normal and DH got a cheque for £500. I seem to remember she'd won the Premium Bonds. We dined out on the story for years with friends!

My worst gift was my sunday school prize. I had to go to sunday school twice every Sunday, even on holiday to get my attendance book stamped. A fuller book was supposed to be a guarantee of a better book. At age 10 I was reading children's classics and lots of interesting books. The book I was given was a board book of about 8 pages suitable for my 3 year old brother. I was very upset and felt humiliated. I was quiet child but surely the Sunday school teacher would have had a better idea of me than that. Irregular attenders got much better books than I did. I always resented being sent to Sunday school

My gran used to give me tam-o-shanters (like Nessie wears on the postcards) she gave me about 3 when I was a teenager in the 70's. I don't know if she thought because Rod Stewart & the Bay City Rollers wore tartan, they were "in". She was very elderly.

One year my (very ex!) partner bought his mother an all-singing all dancing microwave oven. I got a matching oven glove and tea towel ...

Ironing board for Christmas

A Tufty annual from my godmother - I was 14 at the time!!

A newish female close friend of a male in-law had been to my house. We were about to do a refurbishment on our kitchen but she said how much she liked the old kitchen. At Christmas I bought her a basket of beautiful handmade chocolates from Waitrose. She bought me a bottle of slightly upmarket (if there is such a thing) lemon washing up liquid. After Christmas she said how much she had liked the chocolates and asked where I'd bought them from. I said Waitrose. She looked deeply disappointed and said "Oh" as if they had come from the pound shop. I didn't bother to offer further thanks for the washing up liquid. Really there are no words.

Tuaim

kittylester

DH once gave me one of those irons that sat on a big water tank.

All presents are now judged on whether they are better or worse than 'Dad's iron'.

My father bought one of those irons for my mother. He was so proud of it when he presented it to her, saying it would make the ironing easier. I think if she could have, she would have thrown it out of the window. She hated it and it sat for years in its box while she ploughed on with her old Morphy Richards!

Gosh it would have been my best present ever, I eventually managed to buy one myself and have never looked back. Love my Steam iron and huge ironing board, particularly for bed clothes.

Years ago a very good friend of mine had a 40th birthday party. A single male friend of ours told us he had met the love of his life and she was coming to the party, he said she had chosen a special present for my friend.
My friend was persuaded to open the present in front of everyone, it was a set of Slimming World recipe books. Apparently the new girlfriend was a Slimming World consultant and she told my friend to come to next weeks meeting.
My friend never ever forgave her and still over 30 years later moans about it 😂

One Christmas DH gave me one windscreen wiper. Why only one ? Because his side of the car, the driver's side , was not in need of a replacement.
One year a great aunt mixed up the presents for our DC. DD was delighted with the double decker bus she got but her brother was not pleased when he got two pairs of nylon knickers .

Slug pellets!