Telling OAP's to sell their home.

Madmeg

At 73 (me) and 78 (him) I think we should have moved years ago. 5-bed detached, not enormous but now 50 years old. New roof being done as we speak. We can afford most costs (though council tax and heating are now sky-high) but the whole place needs work doing. This morning the toilet seat fell off and we have no idea how to repair it. The shower screen broke two years ago and causes the carpet to get soaked. I could list 100 small repairs that are long overdue (kitchen cupboard doors falling off, light bulbs burnt out, some rooms not decorated in 20 years. DH takes all day to mow the lawns (used take 40 minutes for the same area) and the rear hedges are grossly tall and brown instead of green. He now has mobility and posture problems. It won't be long before he cannot manage the stairs.

The house is full of "junk" (mostly his) that he refuses to even go through never mind get rid of. He would stay here till he dies, at which point I will be out like a flash. I can't clean it properly, even pushing the vac is painful. Getting a "handyman" or a cleaner in our village is imppossible. We are nearly half a mile up a steep hill (no buses) and the village has few shops worth visiting. We have to drive everywhere and DH is getting past it (struggles to get in and out of the car).

I have spent the whole of this year having cancer treatment with the hospital being 20 miles away and over an hour by car, two hours by public transport. No local taxis and Uber has never been seen here.

Elder DD lives 30 miles away and is busy busy. Younger dd is 200 miles away. Most of my friends are dead, though being a member of a few local organisations means I have places to go and people to chat with. But I could do that anywhere.

The new roof meant clearing the loft. DH said there wasn't much up there - but it took five visits to the tip (10 miles away) to get rid, and there is still loads left over.

A 3-bed semi-bungalow would do me fine.

DH does not notice the mess, never throws anything away, keeps his clothes on the bedroom floor and his study papers similarly. You can't get a hoover through the door in several rooms.

But that is me just griping. Re the purpose of the post, nobody should be made to move if they don't wish to and can maintain their homes properly but I would love a house where I can at least cope with keeping it a place worth living in instead of this crap I have got.

I definitely would not support public funds being used to allow people in large houses to stay there, mental health or not. My MIL lived in a 400-year-old 10-roomed "cottage" and when the roof caved in the council not only provided a new roof but installed a damp course, new electrics, central heating, bathroom and kitchen free of charge. I was horrified at that use of public money. When she died DH said he didn't want to sell it (family home and all that crap) but I know it would never have been maintained, not even cleaned. He hung on for 5 years like that before I insisted. Now I can't insist on anything and he would dig his heels in.

I might put it up for sale next week!!!

I feel for you. I'm 2 years younger than you with a 78 year old disabled husband who is a hoarder. I long to move but he won't budge. Nobody being forced to move is fine but what about people like you and me who are being prevented from moving? We matter as well. Maybe we should both put our places up for sale next week. Or divorce?

Interesting post grandtanteJE65
Thank you.

Madmeg our house is full of stuff.
It's exhausting both physically and emotionally to get rid of it but I must.
I'm starting at the top of the house and working down now having done the kitchen and sitting room. It's a long project.

How lovely it would be to have regularly de-cluttered like my Mother-in-law who blithely moved house 200 miles or so at 96!

MissAdventure

Of course it's reasonable to want to be comfortably able to have lunch, buy coffee, whatever takes your fancy.

Nobody can argue with that.

But it is not reasonable to expect others to pay for it, especially not when you are babysitting free of charge for your family. If they paid you the going rate you could do all that without having to be subsidised by the government. Our children have their children so let them look after them you are teaching them to expect to be subsidised from day one. We need to be self-sufficient and to live within our means.

I keep telling my husband it is pointless keeping all his junk, that he never even looks at just nearly falls over on a daily basis, as if I outlive him it is all going in a skip and if I go first the kids will just put it all in a skip. At least if he was prepared to sort it out he could actually save stuff worth saving.

I have a few precious things, not valuable just with sentimental value to me, and my kids know what they are and why and they will keep them as a link to our family past. I haven't got a tenth of what he has but mine will go on and his will go to the tip.

If I could be sure that the money taken from pensioners, from farmers and from private schools, really would improve the NHS- then OK. Trouble is, I don’t believe it. All the 3 above mentioned people, businesses and institutions are mostly successful. Perhaps many may vote Tory. Therefore the decisions smack of spite, envy and greed. The doctors certainly did need to receive a good pay deal as they had fallen far behind in many ways. Shame on the Tories for allowing this to happen. For instance, a consultant surgeon earned less in basic pay than a train driver. Extra money could be made by them, by undertaking private work. How much value do we put on 20 years training?
However, I also think that the management of the NHS is in pretty incompetent and very expensive hands. Throwing farmers money at the NHS will do nothing. It will surely be wasted - ploughed into more useless expensive people - (what for instance, can a Physician Associate do ( 9-5 job £40.000 plus a year - wouldn’t that be luverly?- 2 years training) that can’t be done by a qualified nurse?) and staff sit at their computers in hospitals with barely enough time to deal with patients kindly and with compassion, and all this is stripping the humanity away from a profession and costing us all a fortune. Unless something is done to clear out all useless people and the enormous waste in general, grand statements about ‘our precious NHS’ are just empty rhetoric.
We should all look to be paying more towards our health care - perhaps a specific health tax - as is done in many European countries.

win

Septimia

We have a house larger than we normally need. We don't use all of it all the time, but it is needed when we have visitors.

We are heavily involved in local activities, the community and church. If we moved we'd lose all that. Nearly all the other houses in the village are as big (and expensive) as ours, or bigger, so no chance of moving locally.

What's the point of isolating ourselves by moving?

This says it all 'we need a large house for visitors., so do you expect the government to subsidise you having visitors?

Win didn’t say or imply that she expected to be subsidised.

Septimia, not Win!

The NHS has fewer managers than other large employers. The idea that the NHS has too many managers is a fallacy.

Win no one subsizes me, I pay for everything from my pensions. I do the childcare for free to help my daughter financially. Don't worry I have not claimed of anyone's taxes and expect no one to pay for me.
The wfa that I feel was helpful to me is a different matter. Older people can get more cold, but don't worry I still pay tax on my occupational pension so not expecting anyone to pay for me. I have paid alot of tax and worked for years to be in a position that I am not struggling.

I too am in a detached 4 bed house on my own. When I say 4 beds its more like 4 sleeping compartments as tgey are small compared to a lot of ex council houses near me. My famiky do not live near me and if I downsized they would need to stay in a travel lodge, Air BnB. First though, I'd need to find somewhere smaller that I could afford in an area I would feel safe living in. Two bed bungalows cost more than a 4 bed where I am. Does anyone actually look at the housing market. Of course I could join the junkies and asylum seekers in a multistorey for next to nothing and not worry about heating costs.

The housing market varies round the country. Where I live, south west coastal town, bungalows are no dearer than a similar sized house so downsizing from a 4 bed house to a 2 bed bungalow would leave some money. I don't suppose any of us study the market in every town/city/area we just know where we live or want to live.

If we are considering what people actually want / need and whether others should subsidise those wants and needs, should MPs and parliamentary pass-holders be subsidised by the taxpayer for their food?

Of course they should have access to it on the premises; but they are not particularly poorly-paid, and this cost (according to Full-Fact) is over £7 million per year.

Yes, this is a drop in the ocean compared to what will be saved by cutting the WFA - the aim being £1.5 billion a year - but if we are talking about the principle of not expecting others to finance your life-style / choices, then doesn't this count too?

It's nice that they can have a 3-course-meal for just over £10, and they need to eat, but do they need to be subsidised?

Having read a lot of the postings intimating that those who have found themselves in a property bigger than they need should not expect governments to help them out with any WFA. Wonder why the same philosophy doesn't seem to be applied to those who are living in overcrowded accommodation. How many have children and keep on having children whilst their LA housing becomes too small and expect LAs to provide them with bigger accommodation. Isn't that looking to Government to help out with a problem they created themselves, same as older people not downsizing.

By the time you factor in all the costs of moving and also that any house you buy may vneed work on it, plus the emotional and physical effect it has on your body, I don't wonder people want to stay. There's no guarantee you will get on with your neighbours or like the area and get very isolated.

One of the panellist’s on the Jeremy Vine show told a caller he should get a lodger to help pay his energy bills. I notice at least one posters on here has mentioned the advantages too.
But I don’t think I’d fancy sharing my kitchen and bathroom with someone I hardly know in my old age. You might be lucky to get a lodger who is trustworthy and lovely with it but I wouldn’t like to take that chance.

Don’t move we downsized 7 years ago and now have regrets. We are thinking of moving in the new year.

Doodledog

How is the £8m a day worked out, please? If people are here illegally aren’t they under the radar, and therefore cost nothing? As soon as they claim anything they are no longer ‘illegal’ and are either seeking asylum legally or deported.

Lots of people want to get into the UK because they know they will be employed one way or another. Give everyone in the UK an identity card, so that if the police, were in doubt of a person’s legality, they could ask for it. Then, prosecute the employer if the person is illegal.

Allsorts

By the time you factor in all the costs of moving and also that any house you buy may vneed work on it, plus the emotional and physical effect it has on your body, I don't wonder people want to stay. There's no guarantee you will get on with your neighbours or like the area and get very isolated.

All valid points and a good reason to stay put.

We ended up having two moves when we eventually realised that after the children had been left a while that as happy as we were in our large house with all our memories it was really too big . First had a large garden as my husband retired he loved working in that me I'm not that keen. As we aged and my DH was a few years older than me, it became too much for him and I was the one mowing the lawn. Reluctantly we decided on the second move to a flat. I always said I'd never move into a flat because of noise. It's in a big converted house with six flats and the noise is practically non existent as the walls are so thick. We have between the flats purchased the freehold. We try to do most of the maintenance. When my DH was alive he helped also until a few months before he passed away aged 86. We had moved here when he was 77. I also know a friend who is looking to move to one of those assisted living where you purchase a percentage of the property she is 86. Yes there are memories there are also headaches with cleaning, paying decorators, garden maintenance etc and the cost of heating leaving empty rooms unheated all the time causes damp. To weigh the pro's and cons is a must. The neighbours in the flats I know I can call if I need help especially now when I am on my own and I suppose elderly?

mokryna

Doodledog

How is the £8m a day worked out, please? If people are here illegally aren’t they under the radar, and therefore cost nothing? As soon as they claim anything they are no longer ‘illegal’ and are either seeking asylum legally or deported.

Lots of people want to get into the UK because they know they will be employed one way or another. Give everyone in the UK an identity card, so that if the police, were in doubt of a person’s legality, they could ask for it. Then, prosecute the employer if the person is illegal.

Most employers want to see a passport or other means of ID. I can't be sure, but I think it's a legal requirement to ensure that your employees have a right to work in the UK. You also need one to open a bank account. Immigrants with no right to remain can't use the NHS, claim benefits, send their children to school, legally marry, or do anything that might bring their status to the attention of the authorities.

I am not saying they don't exist, but the idea that they are being housed in university halls, or anywhere else to the tune of £8m a year seems very odd to me. How can they be counted, for a start?

We seem to use all the rooms, except for two bedrooms where the radiators are set low.

Witzend

Septimia, not Win!

So what was the point of her post, when we are talking about being forced to sell because we cannot fund ourselves. If she is able to good, but surely we do not need to hear that!!

Dickens

If we are considering what people actually want / need and whether others should subsidise those wants and needs, should MPs and parliamentary pass-holders be subsidised by the taxpayer for their food?

Of course they should have access to it on the premises; but they are not particularly poorly-paid, and this cost (according to Full-Fact) is over £7 million per year.

Yes, this is a drop in the ocean compared to what will be saved by cutting the WFA - the aim being £1.5 billion a year - but if we are talking about the principle of not expecting others to finance your life-style / choices, then doesn't this count too?

It's nice that they can have a 3-course-meal for just over £10, and they need to eat, but do they need to be subsidised?

Yes indeed.

Why do MPs need subsidised food, drink, travel expenses (nobody paid me to travel to work) second homes, all heating bills paid (Rachel Reeves is said to have claimed over £4000 in heating allowance) not to mention gifts totalling thousands of pounds to pay for their clothing, entertainment, and Lord knows what else?

MPs earn around £90,000 a year. Many of them couldn’t get a job paying that much, plus the general allowances that bump up their salaries. No one apparently thinks that MPs shouldn’t be subsidised in this way. Why not?

But on GN posters are told they shouldn’t expect to be subsidised, because apparently the miserable amount of £200 (£300 for over eighties) is ‘subsidised’ by others paying into the pot. Never mind that these older people paid into the pot themselves and many are continuing to pay.

Who exactly is subsidising the extremely generous allowances given to MPs?

Allsorts

By the time you factor in all the costs of moving and also that any house you buy may vneed work on it, plus the emotional and physical effect it has on your body, I don't wonder people want to stay. There's no guarantee you will get on with your neighbours or like the area and get very isolated.

I agree with you.
Maybe better to clear the house if it’s possible and do some redecorating and continue to live where you’re happy.