Driving

I had someone rear end me in the summer , which has knocked my confidence a bit but I’m a firm believer in use it or lose it , and public transport is pants where I live, so I’ve had to drive . Recently I’ve done a lot of motorway driving and driving in south london where my AC live and that’s helped big time .
A few of my retired friends have gone down to one car and the husband drives all the time , which I don’t agree with . What would happen if the husband wasn’t around .

Romola

I'll be 80 in a few short months and I'm thinking of having my driving assessed by a qualified person.
Has anyone else done this? Should I contact the local driving school? What about the Institute of Advanced Motorists?
I don't want to ask either of the AC. DS drives so fast, and DD has never been a very confident driver.
Thoughts please!

IAM Roadsmart offer a mature. drivers review. Lasts an hour. £85.
I haven’t done it but used to be an IAM Advanced Driver Observer, preparing people for their advanced test. Much rustier now so perhaps I should 🙂
I don’t think you ever forget the skills you have learnt but your reactions slow as you age.

annodomini

I find a motorway less intimidating than winding country roads where it's essential to expect the unexpected. I agree that the low afternoon sun at present makes driving highly risky. Years ago, driving west along the M61 on a winter afternoon almost stopped me driving that route. I find sunglasses useless in that situation because, on country roads, you're suddenly plunged into shade between high hedges. And yet, despite such drawbacks, I persist in driving because I would hate to lose my precious independence.

I had that a few years back driving home from York the sun was so low and bright on the straight road all the traffic had slowed to 20mph, you could not see a thing

I find a motorway less intimidating than winding country roads where it's essential to expect the unexpected. I agree that the low afternoon sun at present makes driving highly risky. Years ago, driving west along the M61 on a winter afternoon almost stopped me driving that route. I find sunglasses useless in that situation because, on country roads, you're suddenly plunged into shade between high hedges. And yet, despite such drawbacks, I persist in driving because I would hate to lose my precious independence.

I’ve always been a confident driver. I drove miles for work and always shared the driving here or abroad with my husband. I was shocked to find my confidence dropped after the trauma around my husband’s death, nit just as a driver but other things as well.
A fractured shoulder earlier this year stopped me driving for 4 months. I’m driving with more caution, less speed now and I. Aware The roads are busy and traffic moves at speed. It’s good to be independent again. I don’t often drive at night

I had a serious accident 5 years ago (not my fault). I had to carry on driving because I was visiting my mother in hospital so I just got straight back on the horse. Then the pandemic came and I didn't drive much.

Then, this summer, I booked our holiday in the UK. DH (who is a competent driver, aged 74, but doesn't enjoy it) said I had to do all the driving. It certainly boosted my confidence afterwards to think that I had covered a huge distance all on unfamiliar roads, driving on the other side of the road, negotiating sheep on the Moors, through big towns like Manchester, coping with potholes and narrow parking places driving an automatic, which I am not used to, and with him navigating! Because we were travelling relatively short distances every day, there was, unfortunately, little motorway driving involved, but I even coped with the smaller roads.

I just took each mile as it came, and didn't think of the challenge as a whole. As with most problems, it is always easier when broken down into its individual parts.

TwiceAsNice when my mother-in-law goes to stay at my brother-in-law's house, she gets her local taxi driver to take her and pick her up.
It's a couple of hours drive each way. Door to door, comfortable and he helps her with her luggage.

Romola when my Dad moved to be near us he was 87 and hadn't driven for a few months.
I rang a driving instructor and explained his situation to her.
She was happy to take him out for a few sessions and assess his driving, and she was happy to recommend he was safe to continue.

I'll be 80 in a few short months and I'm thinking of having my driving assessed by a qualified person.
Has anyone else done this? Should I contact the local driving school? What about the Institute of Advanced Motorists?
I don't want to ask either of the AC. DS drives so fast, and DD has never been a very confident driver.
Thoughts please!

Jaxjacky I have thought about that but I don’t love train journeys and I have really bad spinal stenosis and have to make up my mind whether to have quite a serious operation or not next year. I wouldn’t be able to do a journey by train by myself without help so I think I’ll have to investigate the railway assistance ( coudnt carry a suitcase far for example or mange a long flight of steps) . Anyone have any experience of this ?

Totally in agreement Farzanah A friend, who was suffering with Alzheimer’s was sent for a driving assessment - we all knew she’d fail. However, her DH pleaded for her to keep her licence for local driving, as he liked her to do his banking. He was told in no uncertain manner that the full UK driving licence would permit her to drive anywhere, she was unsafe and her licence would be revoked there and then.
I’m like Cabbie on a busy dual carriage way and not far from the motorway junction, which I have to use to get to either DD.
I drive most days and still clock up 1000 a month.

Just talking to a friend about this this morning. Neither of us is an overly confident driver but I agree that it’s a case of use it or lose it …

I totally agree Farzanah

Absolutely not henetha I think that is a terrible idea. I am so sorry about your accident which was not your fault and caused you to lose confidence. However the answer isn’t for the driving licence to been restricted, but to have some supervised drives with a qualified instructor until confidence returns.
Older people crawling around their own”regular routes” can be a menace and a danger.

Since my accident last November I tend to drive just around roads that I know. (it wasn't my fault, he drove into the side of my car and I spun around in a very unsettling manner).
I think there should be a special category licence for old people who want to keep their car just for getting to the doctor, the chemist, the local shops, etc. If they are found outside their set perimeter they would be fined. The car would have a special plate indicating their designated location.

We still have 2 cars but dh’s is mostly for long journeys. I’m very conscious of the need to keep driving, so although I mostly use public transport (dh uses my car a lot more than I do!) it’s just as well I need to drive fairly often to a dd - 60 miles and 3 motorways, inc. the M25.

My mother had her own car before my father retired, but after that they were down to one - and he always drove. We used to tell him to make her drive now and then, but he never did - TBH she was never the most confident driver anyway.

So when he fell ill, and was in hospital for quite a while, she had to force herself - if she wanted to visit him without taking taxis or 3 buses.
He died a couple of years later, but she carried on driving for around 10 years, until voluntarily giving up her car at 80, after an accident had destroyed her confidence.

I live just off two major A roads and am totally confident using these, but just this last week there have been four accidents closing the roads for hours. Who are these idiots?

I live in South Devon and I prefer motorways to narrow lanes where lots of people drive too fast and think they can see round blind bends.

I don’t have trouble driving on any road type but did lose confidence in lockdown. I made myself drive on the motorways that surround me, to places I didn’t know and night driving and it soon boosted my confidence. I hate doing a long drive as I find it boring now DH isn’t here to share the drive. Sat navs are good at showing you which lane you should be in if that’s your concern.
Use it or lose it, it’s my independence.

We are both keen drivers and share driving on long journeys, it’s not motorways that are the difficult roads, complex junctions with many connections and cars passing on both sides, around towns too it’s very easy to be on the wrong lane.

I enjoy driving but struggle with night driving. I do not like big busy motorways (when I am unsure of my route). Some drivers are just so impatient. I still have my own little car as DH is so protective of his big posh one. I am not allowed to drive it, every excuses comes out if I go anywhere near it and his eyebrows go down very low😂 Hence if I had to drive it in an emergency I would struggle!!

Those anti glare glasses sound good. Where do you buy them? Opticians? Boots?
This last week the low winter sun has been dazzling. I too have cataracts which make night driving with the common use of LED lights a nightmare. I also would like a smaller car in 2025.
I used to enjoy driving, but the very frequent driving DH to hospital appts this last year with all the stress involved has made me more anxious than I should be.

I had an accident driving in snow years ago so I don’t do that now. Motorways I don’t do anymore I just don’t like the speed. I drive everyday the places I am familiar with but I don’t like diversions that direct me from my destination.
I like the independence of my car but I use public transport occasionally for social occasions. It is convenient having my own car and it suits me to drive and have the freedom to do so.

fleurpepper I have those glasses and do find them a huge help. They are also a help when driving into the low winter sun. I'd definitely recommend them.

Another who just gets on with it. I have to drive in the dark one day a week.