More to do before you leave

I’ll be sorry to leave painting and drawing. I returned to it during lockdown as I couldn’t carry on with my usual singing/performing life.

Piles of books too and just the everyday joys, a tasty meal, a good film.
I’m decluttering, but not too bothered about leaving stuff. As one widow said to me, if your house and contents are worth something, they can get on with it…

I'm totally with BlueBelle here. Nothing to achieve or to aspire to but just to continue enjoying life in the pleasant and simple way currently being experienced. However, I did have a recent near brush with death and I realise I need to compile a list of people I wish to be telephoned on my demise and the order of that list. I did think my phone or address book would suffice for this. Wrong. Many of these are business contacts and quite a few are people my children have neither met nor know. Must do this soon.......

Am not going to fret about things left undone. Since a lifetime friend of mine died recently I just take every day as it comes and live life as best I can. No bucket list, no list period. I will greet every morning as a new beginning and hopefully see the day out feeling that I have enjoyed something during that day, if just the smile of a stranger or the cuddle of one of my GCs.
🌺🙏🏾

Not really. As harped on about many times, I had a horrible childhood. Never in a million years did I think If have a lovely daughter and granddaughter, still be married to my DH after 55 years despite setbacks, illness and bereavement.
I have been to someone wonderful places - Venice (my dream) four times, New York, many parts of Spain, France, Greek islands, including Santorini. Me, Kate from the back streets of Birmingham.

downtoearth

I have a huge pile of unread books I keep adding to, I would be very very annoyed to toddle ofc before I have got through them.
I have told the family to put them in my coffin with me.

Exactly that, can't bear the thought of not finishing my current book at least, never mind the pile of 'yet to read' books.

Well one book published, one in the pipe line and two more waiting. So I should like to get those done. Love to be at both my GDs weddings……and a bit more of the world to see yet

My experience of friends and relatives who were dying is that some do regret things they never got round to, as they in the case of two who died long before they reached 70. is that They had thought they would have time in "the old age" that they never saw to do these things.

However, it is often a passing phase, if the person dying is able to come to terms with the fact that they actually are dying. And in the case of those in severe pain - may we all be spared!- the process of dying is something they want to be over and done with.

I myself have started sorting through the things I do not want anyone reading, discarding things that will be meaningless to others, if I cannot find anyone who would like them, and making up my mind about which of the more intangible things, like travelling somewhere I always have wanted to go to - is it still possible? Do I want to go there without my husband?

Some of it I probably will not do, some of it, I hope I will, but am unsure about, and some things I know I do not want to do on my own.

There’s always another cheese and pickle sarnie to be had😜

My mum says she’s still got things to do. She’s 97 and has just gone into a care home!

Oh nanny27, I hope that you do...

Make ammends with my ex husband

Mine is a stash of embroidery and cross stitch kits not yet touched

Before I go a really good sort out so my children don’t have to bother doing it.

Mine is a massive task.
It's hard work - and not at all exciting!!

My DH seemed to think he was immortal. When I tried to gently persuade him to clear out some of his junk, he said “you get rid of my stuff and you get rid of me”. Well I wasn’t proposing to get rid, I was suggesting that he did. Since he died I have spent months doing just that. His words ( and his lack of action) have made it harder. But I have been surprised to discover how much the stuff was worth, though that is thanks to a lot of hard work, sorting and marketing, on my part. One friend said “ just get a skip”. Little did she know.
Unfortunately, I have neglected my own sorting and paperwork, so that has to be my next task, before I return to the final room to be sorted and cleared.

BlueBelle

No I ve done what I need which isn’t much compared to many and I ve paid for my very simple cremation and made a will and putting anything with any value in a cupboard with notes

I seem to be best just pottering now I have no desire to trot off to Dubai or a world cruise but tend to find contentment with my charity shop work, my allotment, close friends and my beach
Simple but ok …. that’s me

I agree, I have no yearning to do much, I truly value my friends and family.

Though having said that we are hoping next Summer to make a visit to Canada (we’ve never been) to see my DM younger sister, who is the only surviving sister of three.

But when I think about Esther Rantzen, she is still pushing for a good cause and I haven't even written to my MP about anything.

I love our home and I am happy here I have no desire to travel the world apart from a few last trips maybe.
Before I go a really good sort out so my children don’t have to bother doing it. My DH doesn’t agree with me he thinks we are going to live forever. Like a lot of people I know he won’t even discuss sorting things out stuff which irritates me. However we have done mirror wills so at least that is sorted.

I once read one of these life-gurus had advised "don't procrastinate, do it NOW! Life's not rehearsal."
I wish I could put that into practice more often than I do, because it's true.

It's probably the only time that something a self-appointed life therapist/guru/snake oil salesman has said that has made me think hard. Normally, the stuff they spout is pretentious twaddle.

First of all several close friends have died over the years and I've felt really sad especially when it's been far too soon. Sending my condolences.
No I've nothing left to do other than enjoy my family and friends. Tbh I've not made a great contribution to the world even in my prime and these days I just try not to take out more than I put in whilst living my life as well as I can. I'm really happy and try not to regret the aspects of my life that I could have done better (and I certainly have them) because I can't change anything.

We are two of a kind Bluebelle 🌻

No I ve done what I need which isn’t much compared to many and I ve paid for my very simple cremation and made a will and putting anything with any value in a cupboard with notes

I seem to be best just pottering now I have no desire to trot off to Dubai or a world cruise but tend to find contentment with my charity shop work, my allotment, close friends and my beach
Simple but ok …. that’s me

I have a huge pile of unread books I keep adding to, I would be very very annoyed to toddle ofc before I have got through them.
I have told the family to put them in my coffin with me.

Katyj

My DH says this quite often but when I ask what, he just says all sorts 🙄

I feel the same way. He is obviously enjoying his life as it is now.

My DH says this quite often but when I ask what, he just says all sorts 🙄

Thinking about our situation, my first aim is to be as independent as possible for as long as possible,leave as much as possible to the family and make it as easy as possible to clear up afterwards.
Have definitely work to do on all three.
Must get back to the decluttering thread...