Changing my name

I would just tell her what you want to be called. You might shorten her name and she might not mind.

I get called several different abbreviations of my name and the only time I wasn't keen was when a dental surgeon I'd never met before, who was about to extract my wisdom teeth, suddenly called me by a shortened version of my name. It seemed over familiar and odd at the time but perhaps he was just trying to put me at ease.

I would just keep correcting her. I have a friend who is terrible with names and frequently gets it wrong. She's always mortified and grateful for reminders

My mothers name is Francesca and anyone who calls her Frankie quickly learn never to call her that again!

I have a friend who I have always known as Pauline. A few years ago she decided to call herself Polly. I just cannot get used to it, try as I might. She doesn’t get offended though.

It must be a bit of a trend because a friend called Anne now prefers to be called Annie and another prefers to be called Lynnie rather than Lynn.

My name was always shortened by my first husband and his family. I didn’t like it but said nothing, being very young. Nobody has tried to shorten it since my divorce. It would be easy to say politely that you prefer Deborah. No need to go to the extreme of changing your name!

Why not just tell her? I have a friend called Judith who told me quite firmly that she likes her full name and not to call her Judy. I really don’t see what your problem is.

My friend who sometimes causes difficulties in restaurants, has changed her name by deed poll and it is all official. This was several years ago and I still haven’t used her new name! I don’t call her anything. Her new name is the same as my sister and a very good friend who’ve I’ve known over 40 years.

I know someone who called her child Victoria.
Always Victoria, never Vicki or anything else.
We all got the memo!

I know two Debs and one Debbie, Deborah is a nice name tho a long one.Just tell people what you prefer.

I know several Judiths, a Judy and a Jude 😄

I have always been known by my full name. If anyone uses a diminution, I either say to them politely that my name is 'Arabella' and that is the name I respond to. After that if theye use anything but my full name I ignore them because it is quite clear that they are not taalking to me.

In this case I would speak to the lady concerned quietly and privately, say that you recognised how easy it is to shorten your name, but you prefer to be called by your full name and you feel sure that she will respect your preferences. If she doesn't, just ignore her.

Ladyleftfieldlover

My friend who sometimes causes difficulties in restaurants, has changed her name by deed poll and it is all official. This was several years ago and I still haven’t used her new name! I don’t call her anything. Her new name is the same as my sister and a very good friend who’ve I’ve known over 40 years.

How rude not to call her anything.

Don't get too worked up about it, just correct her and say you prefer to be called Deborah rather than go on the offensive, could be that she knows a Debbie and so just uses it automatically, unless she is using it in spite, and you have said nothing to imply this, would be silly to start calling her other names.
I have an elderly neighbour who keeps calling me Bridget, it isn't my name but he is getting forgetful so have stopped correcting him and now most of the neighbours call me that on occasion as a joke. I don't mind because I don't actually like the name I was given whether it is shortened or not.

Well it’s complicated……..

No one can pronounce my name

Nobody can spell it

My name is now reduced to 3 letters rather than 8, it’s so much easier. It started at secondary school as at home my parents, Aunts, Uncles and cousins always called me by a totally different nickname anyway, ( cousins still do) .

Sigh……

Sorry forgot to say, just tell that you prefer her to use your proper name.

My D is Judith and very soon sets anyone straight who shortens it.
It is her name and she loves it.

I have never liked my Christian name. It always seemed so out of the ordinary at school. I’ve no idea what my parents were thinking of! DH never called me by it, just by the shortened form. The only people who use it now are my GP and our walk leader, in spite of the fact that I have asked her to use my shortened name.

I would tell her straight my name is Deborah and that is how I like to be addressed.
My husband’s name has often been shortened over the years it annoys me. I usually say that he does not like his name shortened he is far too polite to tell them.

Just gently tell her you prefer people to use your full name. You can explain why if you want to - or not, as you prefer. It should only need to be explained once to each person (especially in a professional situation like visiting the dentist!).

My neighbour told me her name was Devorah and she got very cross because I heard it as Deborah (all three syllables stressed). I worked with a woman called Debra (sic) and her horrible ex used to call her Debris.

It used to make me cross when my late MIL used to insist on calling me by and writing my monosyllabic name with an ie on the end, it felt patronising.

I think it is disrespectful to call anyone by a name they don't want to be called by.

Some people always shorten my husband's name, even though he doesn't care for it and it doesn't suit him as much. We even put his proper name on Christmas cards and still people will shorten it. It just seems a bit thoughtless and a bit rude really not to get people's names right.

People shorten my name too , I find it particularly difficult when it is done by people I don't know very well! My very long friends shorten my name and I am happy about that. My parents never shortened my name nor do my siblings or DH. I really do prefer my full name - because I like it! Tell Elizabeth I'm a gentle way that you prefer not to have your name shortened.

Long standing friends !!

I would tell her kindly that really you do prefer Deborah. And maybe give a few gentle reminders. And then perhaps try a pointed Lizzie If she’s not getting the message. I too have a Mae that is often shortened and I have never liked it.