Frightening memory loss

I agree with others that it is just the temporary situation you find yourself in. It is like the domino effect. You forget one thing, or mislay something. Another day you would hardly think about it , but today it really panics you. So level of stress goes up, breathing can then become a problem and you start worrying seriously. Things that you have never worried about before suddenly become major problems. Vicious circle.

So when I get like this, (and my speciality is waking up worrying about something at about 3am with no one to talk to about it.) So I keep a notebook by my bed and always make sure that the pen works when you go to bed. Then as you try to go to sleep and your brain suddenly comes up with important things that you must deal with, you write it down on the notepad. So when you know that you will be reminded in the morning you are more likely to get off to sleep, having parked the problem until the morning. In the morning you will look at it in a more rational way and be able to see if it really is something to worry about.

Once you start to analyse and worry about things you see it at every corner and put yourself into that vicious circle of putting more pressure on yourself to remember things and so on. Be kind to yourself for a while. Acknowledge that at the moment you are under a lot of stress, and try to just shrug your shoulders and say , well that is how it is at the moment. My way is when I am that state, I try to just carry on with the boring everyday things and do not make any really serious decisions on things such as moving or even buying a new dress. I could go to my wardrobe now and pick out a couple of things that I know I bought when I was very stressed and right now wonder how on earth I chose them. As you relax a bit and sort of mentally shrug your shoulders and accept that that sensible intelligent person you are is there just not quite available just for this minimum time , popped out for a while but will be back when you least expect it! Just have a rest and a cup of coffee and you will find that person returning sooner than you think!

madeleine45

I agree with others that it is just the temporary situation you find yourself in. It is like the domino effect. You forget one thing, or mislay something. Another day you would hardly think about it , but today it really panics you. So level of stress goes up, breathing can then become a problem and you start worrying seriously. Things that you have never worried about before suddenly become major problems. Vicious circle.

So when I get like this, (and my speciality is waking up worrying about something at about 3am with no one to talk to about it.) So I keep a notebook by my bed and always make sure that the pen works when you go to bed. Then as you try to go to sleep and your brain suddenly comes up with important things that you must deal with, you write it down on the notepad. So when you know that you will be reminded in the morning you are more likely to get off to sleep, having parked the problem until the morning. In the morning you will look at it in a more rational way and be able to see if it really is something to worry about.

Once you start to analyse and worry about things you see it at every corner and put yourself into that vicious circle of putting more pressure on yourself to remember things and so on. Be kind to yourself for a while. Acknowledge that at the moment you are under a lot of stress, and try to just shrug your shoulders and say , well that is how it is at the moment. My way is when I am that state, I try to just carry on with the boring everyday things and do not make any really serious decisions on things such as moving or even buying a new dress. I could go to my wardrobe now and pick out a couple of things that I know I bought when I was very stressed and right now wonder how on earth I chose them. As you relax a bit and sort of mentally shrug your shoulders and accept that that sensible intelligent person you are is there just not quite available just for this minimum time , popped out for a while but will be back when you least expect it! Just have a rest and a cup of coffee and you will find that person returning sooner than you think!

Thank you so much for this very sensible and kindly advice.
I do feel very stressed and more than a little unwell at the moment. I have made an appointment for the 6th to talk to my GP about the tests l will have had and also my own emotional health. I live alone and usually cope quite well but l really feel like l’m struggling. I really appreciate your reply and the replies from everyone else. Thank you xx

About 10years ago,my car had lights I had to put on manually,I went to put them on and had no memory of how to do it!

It really worried me,I thought I was definitely getting signs of dementia.Never thought of it being stress related,it may have been.

Nothing like it has happened since.

Wishing you well.

The notebook by the bed idea is one I've been doing for years. Then any odd idea of something I should be doing whilst I'm in bed - on goes my bedside light, out comes my notebook and I note it down. That way I can then relax - rather than trying to remember it.

Another voice saying - it's just stress. It's if something happens repeatedly that it might be "a symptom". Hence I overlooked my mother wondering how to find her way back to the carpark in a smallish garden centre she was familiar with one time - but it was when she did it repeatedly every time that I thought "Whoops.....".

Just a one-off = that's nothing.

My little mum had dementia but she kept getting the same things wrong time and time again till it became obvious that it wasn't going away.

I had a very stressful year with cancer treatment in 2024 and forgot loads of things (particularly names and similar) but not repeatedly the same things. I thought it would get better this year but a new stress has taken over since my DH developed a spinal fracture just before Christmas and is struggling with pain and mobility. And I now remember that when my wonderful dad was diagnosed with terminal cancer nearly 20 years ago I was hospitalised three times in as many weeks, diagnosed with "just" migraines. They continued until he died three months later and I never had another.

Stress can do strange things. As others have said, it doesn't signify dementia but look after yourself as best you can and the chances are it won't happen again with the same situation.

Good luck!

Happened to me at work last year. I'd been down a corridor to take something to another office, walked back up to mine, was stood right outside it but couldn't remember which way to go. Felt totally disoriented and unfamiliar. Lasted a few seconds & I 'came to' but it was very unerving. Not happened since.

I understand how you are feeling , it hopefully it is just stress. I fell just before Xmas whilst walking my dog , I was perfectly calm and happy I pulled my dog over slightly but not in front of me , next thing I remember is being flat on the floor in the street I was half on my dog by it’s back leg area , thank god the dog was ok but I was bruised and battered. Tbh I still don’t know what happened but I hadn’t put hands out to break my fall so obviously I didn’t know it was happening. Any thoughts ?

Missiseff

Happened to me at work last year. I'd been down a corridor to take something to another office, walked back up to mine, was stood right outside it but couldn't remember which way to go. Felt totally disoriented and unfamiliar. Lasted a few seconds & I 'came to' but it was very unerving. Not happened since.

That's exactly what happened! I'm sorry it happened to you too as it's terrifying but glad it hasn't happened to you since.
I will try to calm down and hopefully l won't need to bother my GP with it. Getting older can be quite challenging l find.Thank you for replying to me x

ruthiek

I understand how you are feeling , it hopefully it is just stress. I fell just before Xmas whilst walking my dog , I was perfectly calm and happy I pulled my dog over slightly but not in front of me , next thing I remember is being flat on the floor in the street I was half on my dog by it’s back leg area , thank god the dog was ok but I was bruised and battered. Tbh I still don’t know what happened but I hadn’t put hands out to break my fall so obviously I didn’t know it was happening. Any thoughts ?

I'm so sorry to hear that you had such a nasty fall and that you weren't sure what happened. I can imagine how scared you were. Maybe a chat with the GP? It could be a number of things and a simple check up of blood pressure etc might alleviate your worrying. I will definitely go to my doctor if l have anymore 'funny turns' l wish you and your little dog well x

Transient global Amnesia only ever happens the once Happened to my close friend she lost a day did everything normal caught the right buses went to the correct doctors appointment …locked up for the night etc etc but lost all memory of the day no idea she’d been to the doctors etc
It can happen to anyone and although scary is not related to anything like dementia
That’s doesn’t sound the same as missiseff s experience

This happened to me about five years ago. We had been out shopping and I unlocked the door, stood in front of the alarm panel and couldn’t remember the number to unset it. Something I did every day - sometimes more than once - and my mind was completely blank. Fortunately DH was there and he came in and unset it just as it started to go off. It really frightened me at the time, but it’s never happened since.

I too have had a TIA, but not a very long one. I was driving at the time, going down a dual carriage way to buy some petrol. Then I was coming to driving down a rural road I did not recognise. After a distance I saw a sign that said I was on a very long(1 mile plus) slip road for the local motorway.

To get there I must have come off the dual carriagway where I planned to come off, but instead of going three quarters round the roundabout , I went right round back to the dual carriageway I had just come off, but going in the opposite direction. I had driven some miles down it, done the three quarter turn at another roundabout and headed off. down roads I did know but not well.

I considered going to the doctor, but my usual rule is not to visit the doctor until the second time something happens, The event was relatively short lived and, as Bluebelle says, it only happens once.

Like her friend one of my friends had a similar episode. he was chairing a day school I and other friends were attending. He seemed his usual cheerful self, if slightly subdued, he chaired the Day school as well as ever. His TIA lasted about 12 hours.

Catching up this evening and another response saying I doubt this is age related memory problems, more likely an overload of stress
Take it as a nudge to slow down as look after yourself as best you can

The problem is that when troubles are piling up on you, there is often little you can do about i and seeing a docttor or being sent to A&E they tend to see the symptoms of stress entirely in medical terms.

I had a whole lot of investigations last year to see if I had heart problems.( I haven't) A long teephone call with my lovely DDiL made me realise that all the symptoms I was suffering from stress related. That in itself made me feel much better.

As others have said it’s probably nothing and just a reflection of the current stress you’re under. That said my husband is under investigation for memory and involuntary tremor issues and I made a note on my phone in notes every time I was aware that he was having an issue which really helped when we were explaining the symptoms to his GP, so it might be an idea to do the same

BlueBelle

Transient global Amnesia only ever happens the once Happened to my close friend she lost a day did everything normal caught the right buses went to the correct doctors appointment …locked up for the night etc etc but lost all memory of the day no idea she’d been to the doctors etc
It can happen to anyone and although scary is not related to anything like dementia
That’s doesn’t sound the same as missiseff s experience

Sounds like stress.

There is a more all-encompassing form of amnesia - think it might be called "selective amnesia"???

It is positively embarrassing just how little I recall of my childhood and it wasn't some awful abusive family - it was an Armed Forces family. So I'm well aware that memories started clicking into place at a pretty similar time to when my father had safely come out of the armed forces/retrained and started work in a civilian job. It's no coincidence that my childhood memories virtually started at about that time - and I do recall being extremely conscious that my father might get killed or injured and I was being carted round the world against my will and didnt like either idea and didnt fancy the thought of my mother trying to bring myself and my erstwhile brother up on her own (as she's not the worlds most capable person/very old-fashioned and not a parent by choice).

So - yep....sometimes our brain protects us by forgetting things - but it's not a problem thing. It's a self-protective thing - from things like stressful circumstances.

My experience of army life as a child was very different to yours cariad I took it all in my stride and I have many very clear memories of childhood because I can pinpoint them in every case to where we were living at the time.

Living abroad, in Asia and Europe also gave me a very internationlist outlook and understanding of different cultures and ways of doing things, plus travelling internationally from childhood, often with out my parents left me well able to look after myself gave me a lot of self-confidence.

I am not saying it was all hunkydory, by the time I was 8 I had decided I did not want to marry anyone in the forces. Far too much of my life was governed by what rank my father was and what he did, which placed limits on me and who I did or did not mix with at home.

It's going to vary from person to person obviously how we react to an armed forces childhood. According to my mother - my erstwhile brother was fine with it. He was never going to get any qualifications to speak of anyway and was my mothers favourite child and so he was my total opposite (as I am capable of qualifications and I'm my fathers favourite child - and that's the parent that, presumably was away a lot of the time - though my memory doesnt tell me).

I do remember some comments both parents made about things according to what rank the man was in. As my father put it - "I was the highest rank you could get to be - if you'd come from the 'wrong' background". So the officers came from a "higher class" background to the council house urchin he was. My father adapted to my mothers middle class ways and that meant both parents were then very conscious of who I was (or wasnt) mixing with.....

Yep....I wouldnt have dreamt of marrying someone who was in the Forces either and promptly went into a peace church on reaching adulthood. My mother would have been fine with me marrying a Forces guy - but my father would have probably thrown 40 fits.

Talk to your doctor about your memory loss. My Doctor referred me to a memory clinic, which was a great help.

Sounds very much like stress and fatigue. I too am going through similar issues, I'm 67 and recently my mum passed away and now I'm in the throws of moving and selling her house. I'm constantly forgetting things but I do believe I'm just v tired and as you say you haven't been sleeping well which at our age sleep is so needed.
If worried you can always visit your GP were I'm sure they can give you a memory test. But try not to get too worried about it . Take care and God bless