“Bet Lynch”

Surely one of the reasons for botox,etc is the pressure to continually present yourself on social media.

BlueBelle for me it’s all about consent and Julie’s right to privacy in the midst of this horrendous illness.

It is not about eyelashes, leopard print and lippy.

Bet Lynch was not who she was anymore than any other role she took on.

Privacy does not mean being shut away from the world, for me it means not putting images or over sharing on FB or any other social media platform, without consent.

Why must it be a choice between locked away or on Facebook

Thanks Parsley one other who sees it like me
Why is beauty only make up and eyelashes why can’t beauty be in smiling eyes and wrinkles
She has dementia ! many of us will have it too should we be hidden from the public shut away in a room because we are not worthy to be in a happy photograph because we might scare people with our new ‘old face’ and because like babies and children we can’t give permission
I ve no idea whether he’s a good man or a toxxer but he s been in her life 17 or 18 years apparently he regularly takes her out and about so she is seen by those around her area and hopefully no one has died of shock at her appearance

My friends husband sent me photos of my friend when she was taken into a home to show me she had settled in she didn’t look happy she looked totally empty totally ‘gone’ and no she couldn’t have given permission but it was a stage in life he felt able to share with me and I was grateful for that She was a very neat person with lovely hair who cared a lot about her appearance and he did his best for her He took her out a lot but she never looked happy she always looked cross and empty I d rather see Julie Goodyears happy smile
The papers (was it the DM) were the bad guys in this to put contrasting photos up in a shock/horror headline which they ‘took off’ his fb page

No wonder girls get false eyelashes, filler lip thingies, and Turkey teeth
Encompass different stages in our lives good and bad

I agree with your comment BlueBelle.
When DH was ill and dying I was with him the entire time and to me he was still the lovely man he had always been.
We had photographs taken at GD's birthday a few weeks before he died and looking back at them I was shocked to see that he was a shadow of himself and barely recognisable.

I have just looked at the photo. Julie is smiling and her eyes look bright enough. What is cruel about this is that Julie, in old age,being pitied for how she looks now. I read here that it was a photo to celebrate her birthday and put on her husband's Facebook page. Surely it is not being said that he was wrong to do that because in some one's opinion she has lost her physical beauty and the public shouldn't see that.

We have no idea what conversations may have taken place between Julie and her husband in the past.
For all we know she may have wanted to remain in the public eye regardless.

BlueBelle

Anniebach

“Someone didn’t take a photograph and put it in Facebook her husband did

Maybe he’s proud of her and sees her like this every day so just sees her as his happy elderly wife with dementia with clean combed hair, clean clothes and a huge smile They d had a lovely day out for her birthday why does it have to be negative why do you think he was being cruel what should he do ….hide her in the house and never take her out never have her in a photo leave her out of everything, that’s like the thinking in the old days of hiding a child away if they had a mental health or medical problem
Why does it have to be a negative photo …it would be horrible if she looked unhappy, was unkempt, scowling, hitting out, or crying
I suppose because he sees her every day this is his normal (and he didn’t sell it to the newspaper he put it on his fb page) I don’t see why it should be negative it’s only because we haven’t seen her since her glamour days that it shocked us all
I think we should embrace all things in life not hide them away

BlueBelle
Exactly! He isn’t looking at Bet the same way some people are.
Behind her eyes is still the Bet he loves.

Galaxy

Because we don't know if she consented to that.

I think that is the essence really.

Disgusted at the cruelty of it, how could anyone that cared for you even think of it. I just hope she is cared for in the home she is in and if she has any money spend it on her.
I to thought Iris deeply disrespectful, I never went to see it but when it was on tv I looked and wished I hadn’t.. Never watch anything now with the leads that were in it, it put me right of them..

Because we don't know if she consented to that.

Well he put it on his Facebook page it’s the papers that have spread it but maybe …….
he’s just not ashamed of this stage of her life maybe he’s embracing her just as she is now , maybe he wanted the photo to say ‘’I m still here, I m well and happy and it’s my birthday celebrate with me’
Why can’t we celebrate all our stages in life why do we have to hide someone away who doesn’t look glamorous in the convential way

Why make it public. I think it is so wrong

Elowen33

He still loves his wife and posted the picture saying he and his lovely wife had celebrated her birthday, because he loves her and has seen her every day he does not see what others see, he deleted the post from his Facebook after the nasty comments and is very upset at what others were saying.

He loves her, has stayed with her and cares for her through her dementia which must be very hard.
Another friend said that they do go out quite often, she is not a recluse so perhaps her husband thought he was just sharing a photo of his popular wife enjoying herself on her birthday.

Anniebach

“Someone didn’t take a photograph and put it in Facebook her husband did

Maybe he’s proud of her and sees her like this every day so just sees her as his happy elderly wife with dementia with clean combed hair, clean clothes and a huge smile They d had a lovely day out for her birthday why does it have to be negative why do you think he was being cruel what should he do ….hide her in the house and never take her out never have her in a photo leave her out of everything, that’s like the thinking in the old days of hiding a child away if they had a mental health or medical problem
Why does it have to be a negative photo …it would be horrible if she looked unhappy, was unkempt, scowling, hitting out, or crying
I suppose because he sees her every day this is his normal (and he didn’t sell it to the newspaper he put it on his fb page) I don’t see why it should be negative it’s only because we haven’t seen her since her glamour days that it shocked us all
I think we should embrace all things in life not hide them away

My husband does tell me my humour is quick and merciless.

😀 That escalated quickly.

I would agree that is probably a relief for himself as it is for the rest of us.

That includes my husband.

Galaxy

The thought of anyone 'knowing my mind' fills me with horror.

Quite.

“Someone didn’t take a photograph and put it in Facebook her husband did

The thought of anyone 'knowing my mind' fills me with horror.

Anniebach

People with dementia don’t need to be hidden away and they don’t need to be put on public display

So, they must not leave the house for fear someone might "see" them? Celebrity is as celebrity does. Trust the man who loves his wife to know her mind.

People with dementia don’t need to be hidden away and they don’t need to be put on public display

I think it's a great photo. She looks very happy and definitely a glimpse of the old Bet Lynch. I don't think she'd give a hoot about people's overreactions. People with dementia don't need to be hidden away