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GN makes me lonelier

(183 Posts)
Chocolatelovinggran Fri 11-Apr-25 14:12:13

I'm sorry to read your post RosiesMaw. I do agree that we all have down days, and this must be so much more difficult for widows. Please bear in mind that Social Media posts can be a little misleading. Even those who are busy with friends and family probably have a day when they are at home cleaning the oven: they just don't post about those.
Be kind to yourself when you are feeling fragile. Maybe treat yourself .

I hope that the sun is shining for you tomorrow.

Ziplok Fri 11-Apr-25 14:11:36

Oh I do hope you’ll feel better soon Maw, as Grannygravy says, we do all have down days and those horrible feelings of loneliness, whether we have friends and family close by or further afield, whether we have a partner or not, whether we have children or not. I suppose, in my clumsy way, I’m trying to say it’s normal to have the feelings you have right now, but that I hope you will soon feel less alone and empty.

I do hope you’ll pop onto the GM thread occasionally. I suppose it can seem as if people are full of busyness when reading some of the posts, but my guess is that those posters, too, sometimes feel lonely and/or a bit empty.

I don’t post on the GM thread as often as I used to (almost every day at one time) because I sometimes don’t feel as if I’ve got anything of interest to post, or that I’m doing anything particularly interesting to share, but on the other hand an occasional good morning lets folks know I’m still there, and that’s all it might be sometimes - just “good morning” 😁.

I wouldn’t be so presumptive to tell you to give your head a shake or count your blessings - whatever blessings we have doesn’t mean that we can’t have days when we just feel down and lonely.

Sending you a hug 🤗 and some 💐.

MorningMist Fri 11-Apr-25 14:07:00

I understand, RosieandherMaw. I’m lucky to still have my husband but my son and family live some distance away and are always busy. I see them once or twice a year since the children were born. No siblings or other close relatives. I confess to not being a very social animal nowadays and don’t belong to any local groups, not that there’s anything of interest to me.

I don’t post on GM either because basically I have nothing of interest to say. It does hurt to read about the activities of those whose children and grandchildren live close by. I really shouldn’t read it. I just have to remind myself that at least my son doesn’t live on the other side of the world and that he calls/WhatsApps when he can. It is what it is but I do wish life was a little different.

In summary, yes GN does rub salt in the wounds.

AGAA4 Fri 11-Apr-25 14:04:26

I'm in a similar position. A widow with children who don't live nearby. I try to avoid anywhere where people are talking about their days full of activity and visits. That's their lives not mine.
I have been a widow for a long time and have learned to enjoy my alone times. I have always walked in the country park near where I live and have got to know many dog walkers there. Now I chat to whoever I meet there.
There are days when I can feel a bit left out and I try to distract myself with hobbies.
Sorry you are feeling down RosieandherMaw. Widowhood can be tough at times.

FriedGreenTomatoes2 Fri 11-Apr-25 14:02:42

Maw I get where you’re coming from. Hopefully this is just a ‘down day’ and soon your family will be in touch arranging something to look forward to. It must be hard living a distance away from all you love. Not easy, some days. 💐 and it goes without saying that widowhood must by definition bring its own challenges. x

GrannyGravy13 Fri 11-Apr-25 13:56:30

We all get down days Maw

I would never tell anyone how to feel, as nobody knows how we feel on the inside other than us.

Perhaps it’s because you feel that you are no longer needed by your family despite being loved by them.

RosieandherMaw Fri 11-Apr-25 13:50:04

Friends even!
But “fiends” are welcome too [grin

RosieandherMaw Fri 11-Apr-25 13:48:56

Perhaps I’m having a down day, but reading of all the activities with DHs, with grandchildren and AC, of holidays, of friends popping in, of seeing siblings , of activities of all sorts just rubs in the loneliness of being a widow whose children don’t live anywhere near.
My friends all perceive me as independent and self reliant- who ever sees the hurting inside?
I never want to appear needy to my AC who have busy lives, but now I am no longer called on for granny duty, life can be too quiet.
Yes I arrange coffees and lunches with fiends but feel I am usually if not always the prime mover.
I’ve even given up on the Good Morning thread as I feel so inadequate contemplating a day just about devoid of activity or human contact except with my lovely Rosie.
OK now tell me to give my head a shake and count my blessings!