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How do you spend your Sundays?

(155 Posts)
keepingquiet Sun 04-May-25 21:22:11

I'm sure I'm not on my own here but I find Sundays to be the most challenging day of the week.

Today was no exception-as the only person I've spoken to today has been my son, who clearly didn't want to converse with me.

So after a few chores I went off to do my big food shop. I resent doing this in the week as I'd rather be doing other things and it does get me out of the house. I have even had my Sunday lunch in the supermarket cafe at times, sitting there like Milly no mates.

A cloud of gloom comes over me as I have to pass childhood haunts on my way, and this depression lasts for the rest of the day.

I forced myself into taking a walk, but again, I passed family groups out walking together often three generations just chilling out together and it makes me sad that I'm on my own.

The thing is I have lots of family and friends to keep me company in the week but on Sundays they all seem to be doing things with their own families and never think to include me.

I even joined a walking group to get out more but even they don't do Sunday walks.

I thought about going to the cinema but there was nothing on, and Sunday TV is dire.

I am well aware that not everyone is playing happy familys and I can't be the only person whose loneliness is just compounded on Sundays.

Realising that tomorrow is a BH makes me think tomorrow might just be the same...

So, are you on your own? How do you fill your Sundays? I would love to know if you consider them to be enjoyable, or are you like me and think they are just to be endured?

Greenfinch Tue 06-May-25 17:49:44

My thoughts exactly RosieandherMaw. There is a world of difference between those of us lucky enough to have family around and those who don’t . I often wonder how I would cope on my own and I know it would be badly. The days and evenings must seem very long especially for those who are early risers.

Grandma2002 Tue 06-May-25 17:53:40

I really look forward to Sundays nowadays. My husband died two or three months ago and one absolute is that I go down to my son and daughter's for my Sunday dinner and I'm made to feel most welcome. Occasionally my granddaughter comes down from her studies and joins us.
I go to church in the morning and meet lots and lots of friends who have given me so much support since losing my husband. I have to admit to really enjoying my Sundays

RillaofIngleside Tue 06-May-25 18:15:34

I go to church generally on Sunday morning and enjoy meeting the people there. Then sometimes we go out to the local carvery, or just enjoy reading or playing the piano .
Sometimes family come over instead or we visit our son in his care home and take him out for lunch.

Chardy Tue 06-May-25 18:28:58

Start with an hour's dog walk, same as every other day, then, tired, home for elevenses. Dog walkers are quite sociable, so I often will have had a 2 minute chat to one or more people. So it's rare I don't speak to anyone all day.
DD and I can spend 5 minutes on the phone or an hour - it depends, but I've no idea on what.
I love sport, especially football, F1, a bit of cricket and tennis, so my day will depend on any interesting live sport. I will have recorded old 50s films or old 60s TV during the week, and in the absence of sport I'll go through that to see what's there. I record breakfast TV, so I watch news, weather, fast forward through the rest looking for anything that appeals. This sounds really boring - sorry.
I do assorted crafts, so if I have enough energy, I may pick up something, or go on the internet, games, genealogy, social media, often with aforementioned TV on, or music or Audible. I tend to shy away from giving TV my total attention unless it's something very special.
If my Fitbit tells me I'm going to miss my week's target, I might go down the beach, even if the weather's horrible.

Chardy Tue 06-May-25 18:38:08

RosieandherMaw

With respect, I know OP has asked how we spend our Sundays, but being on your own it is not particularly helpful to read about adult sons or other AC popping in, husbands or family gatherings. If OP was lucky enough to have these, she would not find Sundays so lonely would she?

I agree in part. But we who live alone sometimes imagine that everyone else are having highly sociable Sundays, lunch out, barbecues, drinks evenings, and I don't think this thread shows that.
And we, who've been on Gransnet a while, know there are folks on here who don't live alone, but are very lonely.

w1u7 Tue 06-May-25 18:40:44

Really well said RosieandherMaw. I am very lucky to have my husband but I appreciate that loneliness is a terrible thing. There can be nothing worse when hearing about happy family activities when you know all you have is 24 hours of solitude.

Iam64 Tue 06-May-25 19:29:53

Well said RosieandherMaw. I’m lucky to have two d’s and their families living nearby. They’re families with two working parents, children who do lots of activities. We try to fix lunch or brunch together once a month but it doesn’t always happen. They’re loving supportive and live busy lives.
I try to arrange to see a friend but really miss my husband and our spontaneous trips to the coast, long walks and pub lunch etc etc.
I hear Kris Kristofferson - Sunday morning coming down playing as my back drop

lafergar Tue 06-May-25 19:36:19

Chardy

RosieandherMaw

With respect, I know OP has asked how we spend our Sundays, but being on your own it is not particularly helpful to read about adult sons or other AC popping in, husbands or family gatherings. If OP was lucky enough to have these, she would not find Sundays so lonely would she?

I agree in part. But we who live alone sometimes imagine that everyone else are having highly sociable Sundays, lunch out, barbecues, drinks evenings, and I don't think this thread shows that.
And we, who've been on Gransnet a while, know there are folks on here who don't live alone, but are very lonely.

I find it somewhat hilarious that the assumption is those of us with family are having a grand time.
Life and relationships are complex.

I have some family members who have totally stabbed me in the back, others who can't be bothered to respond to a message.

Some days are indeed very long.

butterandjam Tue 06-May-25 19:38:27

This Sunday : Dh went rowing (boats not arguments) I caught up with my share of housework which I prefer to do alone and very fast while he's out of the way. Walked dog, made lunch, ate it with DH. In the afternoon, beautiful day, son phoned to say he had just mowed the croquet lawn (sounds posh but in this family it's a very rowdy game) and invited us over to play with him, partner, and teen grandkids; after croquet son cooked supper for everyone. After dinner Granddaughter played me her new pieces (piano) then we came home and watched TV.

SpringsEternal Tue 06-May-25 19:44:50

I know exactly what you mean keepingquiet. I'm on my own and hate Sundays and bank holidays - especially bank holidays. All that enforced, obligatory jollity and family time. You think everyone else is in a Quality Street family, having a nice time. I know they're not, but it feels like that. I don't like ringing people who are part of a couple on Sundays. "We're just dashing out -" Aaarrrgghh. I'm self employed so I try to book a client in at least. And yesterday I began the mammoth task of clearing out my stationery cupboard - that was very therapeutic. I highly recommend sorting/clearing. All the best flowers wine

Geordiegirl1 Tue 06-May-25 19:55:18

One day of gloom isn’t too bad surely?

SunnySusie Tue 06-May-25 19:58:53

I mostly spend my Sundays doing housework and washing. Not very exciting, but it keeps me busy. I dont know anyone who wants to meet up on a Sunday because most of my friends treat it as a family get-together day. Sometimes I go to a museum if the weather is poor, or perhaps a National Trust property, although public transport generally precludes Sunday trips anywhere much. I guess I mainly get through it by reminding myself that its only one day of the week and the other six are fine. I guess like you keepingquiet I endure Sundays.

Flutterby345 Tue 06-May-25 20:19:20

I make.the.weeked different from the week, so no friends or activities. Read papers from cover to cover, walk round the park, garden, potter. If family drops in or invites us over fine but don't hold my breath. Gcs all teenagers now so family more dispersed which is the way it goes. There are still two of us. I was thinking maybe if I was on my own I would still make point of having Sunday as Me Day.

RosieandherMaw Tue 06-May-25 20:29:31

Geordiegirl1

One day of gloom isn’t too bad surely?

It’s one day too much

Camry1952 Tue 06-May-25 20:30:05

I used to dread Sunday as it got closer to evening because another work week was coming.I've been on my own now for 2 years.I really don't mind it because my husband always did his own thing on weekends(mostly sports on tv). I read, play scrabble on line, and find a good movie on tv.Now that the weather is warm I'm outside a lot.I work in the yard and there are always neighbors to sit and chat with. You all have probably seen this but if not I highly recommend the tv series "Boomers". I feel ridiculous but I sit here by myself laughing out loud it's so funny.It's on Amazon Prime.

Silverbrooks Tue 06-May-25 20:31:11

Rosieand herMaw writes: You can’t change the day of the week but you can change how you approach it.

I agree.

We have many threads like this about loneliness. The thing that always strikes me is that people are expectng others to provide their engagement and entertainment.

keepingquiet writes: I even joined a walking group to get out more but even they don't do Sunday walks.

In that case, why not approach the organisation or committee of the club to raise the issue of Sunday walks? Be proactive in starting something. Offer to coordinate a small team of people including yourself, willing to plan and lead Sunday walks.

Or do something independently. A small poster on the notice board of a community centre or a social media post on the local community pages of FB may be all it needs to get a small number of people together to keep one another company. It doesn’t have to be walking. It shouldn’t be too hard to find others at a loose end on Sundays who would like to meet to do something together.

I have recently joined U3A. They have several lunch groups, two of which meet on different Sundays in the month. I haven’t joined them as I am just easing my way into U3A by joining one interest group so far but your own U3A may also offer Sunday lunch groups. If not, offer to start something under their umbrella. Then they can publicise it through their website and newsletter.

I’ve lived on my own for a very long time after I was widowed and have no surviving family. I have no option but to be proactive in order to have a social life. Once you make that first step, be the one to start something, other opportunities will present themselves. Volunteering is a good route into that which is what I do most weekends.

As for TV, do you have a smart TV or some kind of recording device? There may be nothing in the Sunday schedules that suits your taste but there are tons of programmes to stream, or to record if you only have access to Freeview channels. I’ve written about this before, but I subscribe to Cinema Paradiso which is old-school DVD rentals. They have over 100,000 titles to chose from, far, far more than any streaming service. If a film or TV show was ever released on DVD they will have it. It’s excellent for both vintage and contemporary productions.

Bobba Tue 06-May-25 21:04:15

I was a single parent for years and my children were with their dad on Sundays- I understand exactly how you feel. It can seem like the whole world is full of couples and happy families at weekends. My solution was to find a yoga class to go to in the morning, buy a newspaper on my way home and make a nice lunch for myself. Then a bit of gardening or a walk, or occasionally see a friend who was at a loose end.

Georgesgran Tue 06-May-25 21:19:39

Two things - I wonder if the OP is ‘suffering’ from FOMO? It’s easy to imagine that everyman, his wife and dog are living their best life, if you’re not? She says she has family and friends on hand during the week.
There was a similar thread some time ago and I asked why some feel that they have to fill every moment of every day ‘doing something?’ We are no longer hunter/gatherers and should have evolved to embrace time and space for ourselves and not feel the need for constant entertainment 24/7. As I pointed out previously, there’s a difference between being simply at a loose end as opposed to being desperately alone and lonely.

Kathmaggie Tue 06-May-25 21:55:15

The same as every other day - since my darling husband died 11 months ago. Sunday to me is no different to any other day. I push myself through every day, appreciating everything I do have in life. Keep busy and look forward to feeling joyful again one day.

keepingquiet Tue 06-May-25 22:49:01

Op here. I have no idea what FOMO means! I need to get out more lol, especially on Sundays...

Silverbrooks- not expecting others to 'entertain' me at all.

I did suggest more Sunday walks on the group I'm on but no one was interested... I have tried.

As for watching TV- no, I don't have streaming channels because I am not a great TV watcher.

Having read the responses here it seems to be that Sunday should be my 'set aside' day. Instead of feeling sorry for myself I should just spend the day doing what I like, probably a bit of painting or writing and embracing the solitude instead of kicking against it.

Georgesgran Wed 07-May-25 00:47:13

FOMO - Fear of missing out.

lafergar Wed 07-May-25 07:33:46

I don't think we need to be told to "join things" or to toddle along to U3A.
Perhaps a person struggling needs a little empathy, some light touch ideas,the comfort of knowing others are in the same boat.

RosieandherMaw Wed 07-May-25 08:04:41

No “should” about it and plenty of empathy here!
In fact I started a thread about it myself under “Bereavement” a while back.
www.gransnet.com/forums/bereavement/1296162-Sunday-bloody-Sunday?pg=2
The first year after DH died everybody was very thoughtful and my AC and friends made sure I wasn’t alone every weekend but that tails off and indeed I shouldn’t have had to depend on others, but being proactive doesn’t come easily when you are vulnerable.
But as I said you can’t change the day of the week, only how you approach it and the suggested “strategies” were kindly meant.
I have said what works (sometimes) for me but I too am mostly relieved when it ts Monday again.

Carenza123 Wed 07-May-25 08:12:53

Why not meet up with a friend or group? Go to a cafe for a drink and chat? Volunteer? Church? There are other people who are more in similar circumstances. No need to be lonely.

keepingquiet Wed 07-May-25 08:15:11

Thankyou Georgesgran.

Yes lafergar- I haven't had much success when joining things in the past and have so far resisted the U3A which I'm sure is great for some people.

I realise that I'm not that lonely- in fact I am lucky to have a very full life and certainly don't feel I'm missing out the rest of the week.

I think I was just curious about how others spend their Sundays, and now I have found out...thankyou.