Wheelchair users

the complete strangers who wheel you out the way to!
I could write a book

It would be good if people in general realised that any one of them could be in a wheelchair within a week. A terrible accident can cause someone suddenly to become paraplegic. I know two pilots (light aircraft) who find it annoying when stupid people don’t understand that they can talk normally - and obviously are often more capable mentally than the person addressing them! Both the two I know were involved in bicycle accidents, leaving them in a wheelchair.
I also know people who participate in skiing for the disabled (again with far more skiing ability than the average holiday skier - and definitely a LOT faster!) using specially adapted sit down skis.
The other issue is non-disabled people using disabled spaces. For the aforementioned people with reduced mobility, the fact that they need to access larger spaces by the car door in order to heave their wheelchair out by themselves seems to be beyond the mental capacity of the morons who think it’s acceptable to dive into a vacant disability space when they’re not in possession of a Blue Badge.
Overall, sadly, there’s no legislation against the ignorant and the stupid!

I dont use a wheelchair but ra5her a rollator and I getb6he same talking over As an educated woman with a Scottish temper mybr3sponse ensur3s f9lk only make 5hat mistake once

I did spend some considerable time in a wheelchair following an injury and it was necessary for me to have both legs fully extended. Shopping was a nightmare and I do recall being in one particular shop and very close to a display of ladies clothing………consequently my ‘legs’ were in another customers way. Rather than waiting for me to propel myself backwards, which I was more than happy to do and quite capable of, to give her room to walk past she decided to attempt to CLIMB over my extended legs.

I had to go into a wheelchair for many years in 1988. My health took a nose dive and our children where 4 and 6 months and it was the only way to go out as a family until the children where older. Short distances I used a stick I was 29 and still use a stick at 67.

I didn't realise you become invisible in a wheelchair and in those days people smoked in malls and shops and nearly got burnt 3 times. It was dangerous for children as pushchair faced forward.

People would ask my husband what I wanted he always ask her she can speak. If left alone with the children while my husband paid for something people would stop and watch me as if I would harm my children in anyway.

My husband had wheelchair rage anyone cut infront of us he hit them if they said anything he would have a rant .

2017 had to go back into my wheelchair for hospital visits because I had jaundice and couldn't walk far. Found nothing had changed still invisible.

Disability whether in a chair or walking doesn't mean incapable. And able bodied people need to realise anyone at anytime in their lives can become disabled. I was born disabled and not all disabilities are visible.

I realised from 1988 how difficult it was for my husband to get round some shops as aisles where blocked unfortunately nothing has changed. I think all managers of shops ,designers of shops ,people who time pelican crossings need to spend a week in a wheelchair and see how they manage . Plus walk slower using a stick ,wear a blind fold , headphones so they can't hear . Not at all the same time but to have a feeling what it's like not being able to do things .

I have emailed no end of times about packaging for food and other stuffs. Example Boots changed the lids on there vitamins before I could open them using the handles of my Oxo can opener. Now I end up destroying it levering them off with screwdrivers. At least I kept some easy open tops. I have said time and time again about getting disabled people to test new packaging but all I have ever had back is instructions how to open whatever it is I am complaining about . I do reply saying I am disabled I do understand how to do it as it's written on the product but it is impossible to do . 🤬🤬🤬🤬.

Thankfully I have not had abuse since I moved to the north west . Found across the north people don't see the disability but you as a person the same on a recent holiday in north Wales.

A warning to able bodied people if a person in manual wheelchair that they can move themselves or electric wheelchair never just grab them and push . As this has happened to friends of mine . Would you just grab a buggy or pram and push a child of course you wouldn't so why do you think it's acceptable to do it too a disabled person.

I do appreciate people asking me if I need help and usually say no but thank them very much for offering. I do ask for help when I need it . Disabled people appreciate being asked if they need help and will accept it if needed .

So abled bodied don't stop asking even if your help as been refused as some people need help I do at times.
And appreciate that help .

I had both mine done in 2022 and sunglasses certainly helped but mine were prescription ones so at least I could read. One thing I did take steps to prevent was not to accidentally touch or rub my eyes by getting one of those big sterile dressings and taping it onto my forehead and chin. Very reassuring overnight and looked rather like a giant eye patch. I’d leave it on whilst I washed my hair in the morning. In fact since then I’ve used an eye mask at night as it helps cut out bits of light in our bedroom and I sleep better.

Hope your operation goes well.

Romola

Sorry, but I'm going to have a tiny rant about the users of motorised wheelchairs in shops and supermarkets.
Please don't propel yourselves at wheelchair top speed up and dow the aisles. You really could hurt someone who isn't as nimble as they were. Actually the main offenders are men.

4 miles per hour is the speed limit of these machines on the flat, which is a brisk walking pace not top speed, but I agree this is too fast for many dawdling and wandering around the aisles.

Since COVID , people seem far less aware of those around them, and also less inclined to watch where they are walking and move out of the way of others. I am able to walk, but find it frustrating when I want to shop at a reasonable pace.

It seems to be a real nuisance that staff treat anyone with a physical mobility problem as if they are incapable of answering for themselves.It’s a sort of embarrassment by them presumably but good to hear that many of you don’t put up with that attitude.

Gogo84

When I fly to America now to see my DD and family, I order a wheelchair to take me to the waiting lounge as I find it too tiring to walk all the way to the gate. More than once I have been shocked by customs/security staff looking straight over the top of my head to ask the person who was pushing me a question For example "Can she walk?" I may be elderly but I'm quite capable of speech! People who have to use a wheelchair all the time must get the same treatment, which is shocking. I would always address the person to whom the question was posed, be they in the chair or their helper. Have other wheelchair users found this dicrimination?

Yes definitely, it happened every time when I cared for both my late husband and mother. I always said 'ask them not me' but it never appeared to sink in. They were both stroke survivors so slow to understand and speak, but people should give them the time they require and respect them as a person.

Yes I do it's horrible and what makes it worse is my husband's deaf and they try to talk to him first. So I often have to quite loudly interject and explain that they need to speak to me so I can make sure he understands.

My daughter is a wheelchair user. She has been pushed out of the way in a shop by strangers as though she were a trolley, spoken over, and had dogs on long leads climb onto her. Most ppl treat her well and thoughtfully, but the ones that don't are outstandingly rude.

I always try to address the person in the wheelchair or other disability. I think those of us who have a disability ourselves tend to be more understanding of others. Another problem is when people barge in and take over entirely. Again, a question of asking the person concerned. I once saw an older man in a shop trying to choose CDs. He was obviously partially sighted and was straining to read the titles with the CDs almost touching his eyes. I asked him if he would like me to read the titles for him and he accepted. If I had simply read the titles without asking permission first, he might very well have been insulted. I think we always need to remember that the person is first and their disability second and their dignity is vitally important

I agree that people who do this are annoying, but in my experience, most motorised wheelchair users are considerate and are usually the ones being bumped into by people who don't look where they're going. People will also think nothing of barging in front of wheelchair users, especially in supermarket aisles, expecting them to wait for long periods before they can move, instead of standing aside and letting them through sometimes.

I use a scooter around my local town and a powered wheelchair when I need to go on any sort of public transport. As I am usually unaccompanied on any of my trips, people can only talk to me and all do so. On those occasions when I go out with family, my daughter just ignores anyone asking her questions instead of directing them to me.

I find that the overwhelming majority of people are extremely kind and helpful and have often been very grateful for assistance from bystanders

Sorry, but I'm going to have a tiny rant about the users of motorised wheelchairs in shops and supermarkets.
Please don't propel yourselves at wheelchair top speed up and dow the aisles. You really could hurt someone who isn't as nimble as they were. Actually the main offenders are men.

It's a reflection of the poor attitude towards disabled people in general. I agree with Georgesgran, that people don't expect (or want) disabled people to have a life. A close family member is a permanent wheelchair user. When we're out and about enjoying ourselves, a few of our local acquaintances make a point of coming and asking if we're alright and if we're sure we don't need any help, in concerned, hushed voices, as though they don't expect us to do normal things like go to the cinema, a restaurant or the shopping centre. All they see is disability.

I have used assistance like this at Manchester airport many times and never have this problem .

Hip joints🤪

Fed up with people’s rucksacks and bottoms.
Hate damn thing. Awkward. Heavy to wheel myself.
I’d love a motor propelled. Scooters really far too big in shops cafes or restaurant.
Getting whizzed by things you’d like to look at.
I end up having a hissy fit!
Or grabbing on to clothes racks. I’ve pulled things off accidentally
Reversed scooter into display cookware making a racket.
Getting stuck in lift with 40 pairs eyes staring at me!
And so on. It’s chair or nothing.
2 rare diseases .brain tumour removed adrenal insufficiency, both him joints and knee joints replaced. New thumb joint.
Load aggressive tumours benign pain removed from spine last year. Now waiting for infected bile duct hernia and kink in intestine sorted. I’ve Acromegaly/Gigantism, bowel longer than everyone else’s. No support. Have to sort the endocrine stuff myself as rare diseases. Ok if you’re diabetic or thyroid patients. No energy to drag myself about. Outings GP or Hospital appointments. DH works full time. Cares for me. Cooks and cleans. He has very responsible job and spends a lot of time I’m sure hiding behind the curtains! Moved to Wales. Here the most non patient centred care ever come across.
I don’t have Motor Neurone or Parkinson’s. How horrendous to live with those ghastly diseases. .Im damned lucky.
Onward And Upwards and all that!
Sorry to bore you all to death xxx

@MargaretinNorthant. You will probably only need the sunglasses for a few days and the wrap around ones are ideal. If you can fix your shower head lower than usual for a few days to avoid your face you probably won’t need a shield- we didn’t, just washed our faces at the basin with a flannel to avoid soap in the eyes. Hair washing was more tricky, but if it can be left for a few days, or a friend can wash it backwards over a basin avoiding the eye that works well. It’s a very short time before you can do everything normally.
You will find that the lens in your current glasses is too strong for the “new” eye, but they won’t change it until your 6 week check because the eye changes and adapts in that time. We just asked our regular optician to take the lens out for that eye, it was so much better.
Your eye will probably be fine and you will be seeing out of it without any problems within a day or two.

My friend went for a cataract operation. She was in a wheelchair accompanied by her husband. The receptionist asked “What’s her name”. Her husband replied “ If you ask her, she’ll tell you! “

I don't know if this is in the right place or not, if not please forgive and move to ehere it should be.
I am to have cataract surgery shortly. Have been advised to have a waterproof shield for showering, and they strongly suggest dark sunglasses. Are the wrap around ones ok to use as I already wear specs? I have to buy online and am a bit bothered about fit. Is there anything else people feel would be of use after the surgery please? I know its not a huge thing, but living on my own I want to be prepared for any eventuality.

Yes people almost always talk to the PA pushing the wheel chair.

It's horrible. I've been getting this since having to use a wheelchair at times (in between I use a mobility scooter). And yes people talk to OH over me. Even worse, OH automatically used to have me out of view of whatever reception desk we were going to. Not deliberately, but because it was instinctive to have himself in front of the desk and he was behind the chair. So I had to turn my head right round to try and talk to someone.

I decidedly was myself - smiling and addressing people as if I was anyone else, and yet people still kind of ignored you. It really is horrible.

I don't quite get that the same on a mobility scooter. A bit sometimes (at reception desks when someone is with me). But maybe I'm sat that bit higher and look more independent.

Absolutely hated being pushed in a wheelchair, and if I do end up needing one permanently I'd want a power one so I don't look "dependent".

Primrose53

Sadly my husband is now in a wheelchair following a severe stroke and we even get receptionists in hospitals addressing me rather than him.

I'm sorry to hear that, Primrose.It must be very hard for you both.
My mother used to get frustrated if she couldn't remember the right word and someone would anticipate what they thought she wanted to say.