Anyone else 'let themselves go'?

Well, since retiring I no longer bother with makeup (unless doing family photos or a party etc.), heels (actually that was since lockdown) or smart clothes (no need when looking after toddlers). However, I'm probably fitter and healthier than ever. So many people let their bodies go via unhealthy diets and sedentary lifestyles - at this point I'm putting my efforts into good diet, regular exercise and lack of stress. You can keep your makeup, nails and fashion - they will not help you to have a healthy old age.

Apologies, that should be MissRedd.

MissRedd

I have had more days of putting on my "round the house" clothes. But, I do work quite a lot from home. I have most certainly been using less make-up.

I do remember a time I would not leave the house without my make-up on. It was somehow a very big deal and was a no-no, taught by my mum.

Nowadays, I will put a little lip gloss and some moisturiser on my face and run to the Co-Op, and not be bothered a bit.

I find that freeing, really.

I think if someone really feels they are letting themselves "go", in the line of not caring and feeling depressed, then that is worth a thought or two.

I think they could be two very different things. I have had times in my life where I felt very anxious and depressed, especially after losing my dad just after Christmas.

There were days were I didn't even brush my hair. I just was a mess and I couldn't be bothered whatsoever.

I don't really have "round the house" clothes, I wear much the same everywhere, so long as they're clean that's fine by me. I do sometimes wear special occasion clothes, but rarely.
It was our golden wedding recently and I celebrated by wearing a dress, not new but a favourite - I very, very rarely wear dresses so this was a red letter day! To be fair I did try to find something new to wear, urged on by my daughter, but simply couldn't find anything that I even wanted to try on, let alone buy.
Like MissRed, when I was young and when I was going out to work I used to dress up smartly and never went out without make up, but I don't feel the same pressure to conform now.

I'm definitely not depressed. I feel confident and happy that I no longer have bother trussing myself up in smart clothes, hobbling myself in uncomfortable shoes and plastering grease on my face. I'm just relaxed and happy just being me.

I make an effort inamaintaining myself but then I enjoy it and love clothes, make-up; the whole scene really, and if nothing else I have lots of lovely girl time with my grown up granddaughter and 'designer talk' with grown-up grandson.
I really don't think many people let themselves go unless suffering from depression - look around you at all the well-dressed people in this wonderful hot summer - even men!

ViceVersa

Casdon

ViceVersa

eddiecat78

I hate that expression, especially as it is usually used to insult someone ("did you see Mary, she's really let herself go").
If someone has reached the point where they have the confidence to look how they choose and not care what anyone else thinks they should be admired not criticised

With me it's the exact opposite. After a lifetime of being criticised for my looks, you eventually get to the stage where you're past caring. What's the point?

Isn’t it about your self esteem, rather than what other people think though? I just feel better in myself if I make an effort. I’d see making no effort as sign of diminishing confidence in myself rather than increasing.

When you have none - self esteem or confidence in yourself - then it's hard to really care, to be honest.

I think we are saying the same thing then, we can all only give our own experience. You both have my greatest sympathy, that must be incredibly hard for you.

Never. Change into my house clothes when I get in and remove my make up but do not leave the house until I look as good. as I can.

I agree ViceVersa

Casdon

ViceVersa

eddiecat78

I hate that expression, especially as it is usually used to insult someone ("did you see Mary, she's really let herself go").
If someone has reached the point where they have the confidence to look how they choose and not care what anyone else thinks they should be admired not criticised

With me it's the exact opposite. After a lifetime of being criticised for my looks, you eventually get to the stage where you're past caring. What's the point?

Isn’t it about your self esteem, rather than what other people think though? I just feel better in myself if I make an effort. I’d see making no effort as sign of diminishing confidence in myself rather than increasing.

When you have none - self esteem or confidence in yourself - then it's hard to really care, to be honest.

PS I shocked and amused the assistant in Nationwide when she complimented me on my small purple shoulder bag. I told her I was wearing matching knickers 😳

When I go out I make am effort to look colourful
I wear bright clothes
Matching coloured jewellery from charity shops
Comfy footwear just like Kitty
Look Fabulous Forever (make up brand) most days
And don’t give a toss what other thinks

Let yourself go, and let distance yourself from societal expectations, and worse, the nasty judgement of other women?

Agree AmberGran.

I've always dressed as I please - in the corporate world I loved being suited and booted, well made up but always comfortable. Why have so many of you been living in uncomfortable clothes for so long ?? - I don't understand that.

I don't wear makeup as much now, and rarely at home, but always have my earrings in, my hair done (even if that just means up in a chignon because it really needs a wash) and casual but nice clothes on.

I can't afford right now to be a slob anyway, even if I wanted to. DH has cancer and part of keeping his spirits up and maintaining the 'norm' is that I always make an effort - if I don't he notices and thinks it's because of his diagnosis and I'm depressed, which then makes him depressed.

Aveline you are not a slob . You know what is comfortable and suits you. I only wore makeup when it was my children's weddings and had it done . I stopped wearing make up when I was 25 when I had my daughter.

I wear pull on clothes as my hands can't do small buttons or zips . Always wore big knickers and just gave up on underwire bras from M&S and wear their' body range ' no wire and no padding . They are £22 only a size 38C but it's the most comfortable bra I have ever wore. The other night I forgot I still had my bra on when I went to put my pj top. They are soft and I look like I have boobs they are very supportive.
I live in pull on trousers and shirts with no buttons and when I go out trousers and Seasalt tunics . All my shoes ,boots and trainers from Hotter only footwear you never have to break in.

If you feel comfortable then you gain confidence.

I used to wash my hair every day when I was at work.

Now I go to aquacise several times a week, I don’t bother to do it so often as it soon looks a mess after being in the water.

Have never worn much make up, even less now.

“You can’t gild the lily”.

As my darling DH said once when I was fretting whether I looked ok on a night out. “No one’s looking at you”.

(It was meant to reassure me, and now I often think how true)

Sometimes i wonder whatever happened to "women's lib". Would you find a man wondering if he'd "let himself go" cos he was wearing comfy clothes? I very much doubt it!

I've always worn what I want, when I want. It's sleeveless top and shorts at the moment as it's so hot - I don't see the point of trying to cover up my 19st (very!) fat legs and arms as some would - why should I be uncomfortably hot?

Nope I have not let myself go, wear very little make up wear perfume every day whether home or out hair and nails done ever 4 weeks no Botox or fillers for me just like to look decent for me nobody else

No I m the opposite I even wear my light make up and earrings and perfume when I go to the beach or allotment just don’t feel alive if I m not looking what I feel is my best

Footwear'

I last bought a new pair of shoes (sandals) 6 years ago. I have 2 prs of sandals, I pr trainers, wellies, a pair of smart black flats. ditto red, a very old (25+) pair of leather mountain boots which I still wear for walking, and now for gardening as I appreciate the extra ankle support. I just re-waterproofed them this week.
I also have a large collection of handknitted scandinavian wool socks, worn round the house and inside boots and wellies.

I remember my mother talking about " putting her face on" It was a rather orange powder and always lipstick. Tweed behind the ears. Hair, grey something like the style favoured by the late Queen.
Her outfits were like some sort of watered down regalia.Wool and tweed featured heavily, always a " good coat", stockings and Bally shoes or Val Dal. They were put back in the boxes after use.
A watch, rings, necklace and earrings.
So sad to see her in a nursing home is red striped nightie that wasn't even hers.

No. I've not let myself go.

I look tidy apart from dog walking and gardening. I don't iron. I shake, hand press, fold - out of the dryer.

Excellent hair cut, lovely bayalage. Lippy, good moisturiser.

I think a lot of people gave up being smart during COVID, even those who WFH.

I shower, wash and blow dry my hair every morning. I put my makeup on every day (even did during lockdown). My nails and toenails are painted, just a light neutral colour. I like nice clothes and wear a fresh outfit every day.

It's just who I am and I've always been like this and see no reason to change now. We're all different, there's no right or wrong. Just go with what feels right for you.

Aveline

I had a thought this morning as I got into my unironed trousers and top and shook my hair: I've let myself go. I gave up on make up, won't wear uncomfortable clothes and definitely no uncomfortable shoes no matter what they look like.
I'm quite happy. I don't care about 'being judged'. Maybe it's the confidence of older age or maybe I'm just a slob. Is it just me?

Me too.

I thought I was liberated in the 1960's , but we hadn't a clue.

Old age is the REAL liberation to do exactly as we please and nobody gives a damn. Because I'm invisible !

As a child I used to dream of being invisible. And being able to fly. AS soon as they bring out that little back-pack-jet thing I'm up for it.

When DH was so unwell and caring for him was a more than full time job I reduced the time spent on myself and have never reverted. Like others, clean person and clothes, a five weekly good haircut and expensive scent (much loved by DH) are enough for my life now, and I only get out the iron if unavoidable. As my mother would have pointed out, nobody’s going to be looking at you.